Patrollin' My Terriertories!

Well, I think that nasty snow was some kind of April Fool'sy joke 'cause it is all gone now. Instead, we got some sunny weather in the fifties which meant I finally got to go patrol all my terriertories. I was so excited to get to go on walks - I got two long walks this weekend and it was so much fun. I had to pee everywhere to mark that "Whitley was Here." Momma says she doesn't even know how I could have that much water in me. She doesn't understand that I have a highly techernicull way of allocating pee. I call it the Squirt System - a squirt here, a squirt there. I can't tell you any more because it's Top Secret Classified Information, but it is an impressive system that can last me for an hour and a half walk with only one water refill.

Anyways, I had lotsa fun. I was even skipping on the walk. I have this funny skipping thing I do when I am really happy - I do a little skip with one foot. It makes my momma laugh. But she doesn't think everything I do is funny, like when I tried to start a fight with a rottweiler. But I had a good time growling and showing off who was boss. ME, I'm the boss of the whole wide world, especially Hahvahd. It is mine and he shouldn't have been pooping there so I had to bark and growl a lot. I was kinda disappointed I didn't get any pets on my walks, but I did get some oohs and aahs. And I got some snuggles from my momma when we got home. So I think this was a pretty good weekend!

Congrats to my pal, Beanie McTavish for being Dog of the Day today! Way to go Beanie!!

April Fools?

I thought my momma played a big April Fool's joke on me this morning. See, she said it was April but when I went out there there was all this SNOW! In APRIL! I was pretty sure she musta spent all night trucking it in to trick me, but then I remembered she'd been asleep in the bed. Hmmm, I think mother nature or God or somebody must be playing a joke on us. Cause all this snow is crazy!

Anyways, I had another exciting day of supervisering my momma while she coughed and wrote a paper - not very exciting. But I did get in some good playing with my Koko Chewnel toy when my momma was doing yoga - I brought her the toy tons and she threw it. I figured she musta wanted to play since she was down on the floor. Hee hee! Hope this weather gets better so I can get a walk.

Bad Whitley Returns!!!

Being Nurse Whitley just wasn't that much fun. I mean, my momma just keeps being sick. It is so boring. I wanted to go on a walk today, but we couldn't because she is sick. Instead she took me on a very strange car ride. I got in the car which was already running and I was super excited. But I fell asleep pretty soon and when I woke up and smelled the air, it smelled the same. We were right in the same place! So I fell back asleep and when I woke up elebenty million trillion hours later I got out of the car - and we were right back at the house! I peed the grass again since we'd been gone ages. I just am mad I missed the trip. Momma says there wasn't a trip, she was just running the car since the battery had to be jumped, but I did not see her jumping nothing, so I know she is lying. Then she left and came back with some foods and stuffs, but no MEATZ. It is a travesty!!! After I got a bath, she was upstairs working on a paper and coughing and stuffs and that's when I decided to have fun! Fun like pooping in the house and tearing up those snotty wontons of Kleenex in the trash! It was a good time, but momma was not too happy about it. She is no fun sometimes!!

Pee S. Thanks to all my pals who congratulated me on being a DDP yesterday and gave me gifties. Y'all are the best!

Nurse Whitley, Reporting For Duty

I think that is now my job or something. Our maybe my second job, since I still gotta be Head of Security. You see pupses, my momma is still feeling sick. She is having lots of big time coughs that I need to bark at and blowing her nose tons and sleeping a lots and even urka gurkaing some. It's a lot and it keeps me very busy. She was feeling so bad today she did not even put on her makeups and make her hair straight!! She just wore her Hahvahd sweatshirt and snowflakey pants - that is not a good sign. Especially my momma's hair - it was kinda scary and all over the place. Normally, me and momma are very vain and we like to get all dressed up and cute but my momma is not feeling good enough to do any of it. So I did an extra good job of guarding her and even got a Texas Toothpick in return. Yum yum!!! As much as I like Texas Toothpicks, I still want her to get better so we can go on walks and stuff. And I can get Texas Toothpicks anyways, right?

Sick Momma = Boring Momma

Yeah, you heard it right. My momma has been sick a lot of her Spring Break and she is real boring. All she does is lay there and cough. Big yawns. My barks are WAY more impressive than her coughs. But apparently she is too sick for walks and pool ball and other fun stuff even though she was not to sick for Lady Gaga. She didn't even bring home a meat dress for me! Stingy momma. Probably kept all the MEATZ for herself.

I have been really impressing everyone around here with all my barking skills. I bark all the time. And my momma has no voice so she can't even tell me to shut up. It is so funny. BOL! But pups, don't think I'm just a big meanie. I know how to make my momma feel better. When she came home from shopping today, I brought her two toys - the Barkardi Rum toy and the Loubarktin shoe toy. I know the way to my momma's heart!

Since it is St. Patrick's Day tomorrow I've got my momma's favorite Irish "blessing" for you:

May those that love us, love us.
And those that don't love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if He doesn't turn their hearts,
May He turn their ankles
So we will know them by their limping.

And momma wonders where I get all my evilness from!!

Spring Break!

I have been havin' lotsa fun on my Spring Break! On Wednesday I went to that airport place and got on a plane then got on another plane. I still didn't get no "intensive pat downs" but I did get a nice pat on the head. I think that Logan airport place has false advertisin'. I was so happy to be back in Texas, I got super excited when I smelled Finley's momma - I went crazy in my carrier. And I had lotsa fun huffin' the Texas air, specially when we got to Plano. Plano just has a special smell to it that requires lotsa huffin'. I was grinnin' tons and I'm not usually a super-smiley pup. I had lotsa fun with Finley, then Maurice and his momma came home yesterday. Momma says I am acting like a groupie becuase I keep following him around and panting at him. She says she needs to buy me a copy of The Rules because guys like girls that play hard-to-get. I thought The Rules were about pooping in the house, since that seems to be problematic but apparently they're something else entirely. My barker has been turned on full-force since I've been back. I don't bark tons when it's just me and momma, but I bark TONS when we're back in Texas. Barking is fun!!

Mardi Gras!

Happy Mardi Gras everyone! I am hoping to get some gumbo, seafood dirty rice, crawfish etouffee, and King Cake. But I have the feeling I may be disappointed since my momma is so lazy. She does not even want to chase rats with me.

About a week ago, I saw a rat late at night in the bushes by the big house. I have been obsessed with getting that rat ever since. I keep trying to get it, but for some reason, momma does not want to chase rats with me. I am only doing my job as Head of Security! It's my job to kill intruding vermins and that rat looks like it would be fun to kill. For some reason, my momma wants me just to "do business" when I go outside. Doesn't she understand rat killin' is my business?? Mommas, they are so difficult sometimes.

I'm a Daily Diary Pick!

Ok, there is no excuses for my momma. She knows I am a DDP for tomorrow (technically today) so that means she has to treat me like the princess puppy I am tomorrow. I have a list of requests and demands to explain to my momma what that means. That means EGGIE WEGGIES for breakfast, whatever she is eating for dinner (along with my own dinner of course), a couple of Texas Toothpicks, a stinkey chewie, and LOTS and LOTS of playing with the squeaky toys. Those are my demands for right now, I will try to dream up a few more for tomorrow so give me some other good demands, ok pups?? Thanks!!

Apologizin' and Exorcising

I am a real expert at apologizin' to momma. I do a great job. I know some pups are wondering know what a cutie like me has to be apologizin' for except for the unbearable cuteness. Well today, I had to apologize for an accidental poop in the house. See, I got my bath and then after my bath I was doing all kinds of zoomies and bumping into the walls and I think I literally knocked the poop out of myself in the living room! Momma wasn't too happy since she'd been out with me an hour ago. But poop comes out a lot easier after zoomies in a warm house than outside in the cold. Anyways, I got that "bad dog!" stuff. So I was apologizin' to momma while she was doing laundry by trying to trip her so she would get down on the ground and pet me. She got kinda irritated so she told me to go to my crate. Then she went back upstairs. I sat in my crate for a whole ten minutes since I knew I'd been kinda bad. Then I started bring my momma toys while she was doing her exorcising. My momma does lotsa exorcising now, every day she is exorcising. I think she have some bad demons in her since sometimes the exorcising makes her dance, sometimes she is on the floor doing weird things, and sometimes she makes funny faces. But I have my own methods of helping her exorcise, like bringing her toys. I brought her 7 different toys while she exorcised herself. Then I got to sit on top of momma and give her lickies. And I think it worked since I got pizza crust tonight! So my advice is, if you want to apologize, try bringing your momma lotsa toys. They love it!

A Visit with Finley's momma!

Finley's momma came to see me last week. It was tons of fun She even brought me new fleecies. I had a lot of fun getting her to throw toys for me and sleeping on her head. And she is so much better than my momma - she leaves eggy weggy on her plate for me to eat unlike my momma who is real selfish with the eggy weggy. We all had a good time. Of course, I think they could have spent some more time with me and less time eating at restaurants and getting their hair groomed and seeing movies about black swans, but overall it was a pretty good visit. I understand the eating part and even watching a movie about birds since their fun to bark at, but not the grooming part. I just think my momma wants to have pretty light hair like me. I'm still the blonder one though - BOL!
But my dumb momma went somewhere with Finley's momma and lost her. I think this place is called the airport or Logan - you know, the same place that promises intensive pat downs but doesn't deliver. So now I am back to just momma which is kinda disappointin' but at least she remembered to feed me my ground beef before midnight tonight!