This is funny!!

I got this from a friend's page. I think this is sooo funny!! I have 2 cats in my house and I totally agree with this!!
This is the dog's diary vs. the cat's diary:


DOG:
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

CAT:
Day 983 of my captivity..
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.


There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...............

Getting to know you game!!!!

Copy this diary entry, and paste it into your diary. Read and then delete my answers. Then you can fill in your own! We can get to know our pals better!! Have fun!! Then send a rosette or pawmail to 4 pals and ask them to post it in their diary!!!!

1. What color is your collar?
Orange and it says "Love Me" on it.

2. What kind of food do you eat?
Wellness Super 5 mix Lamb and Barley yummy!!!

3. What are your favorite treats?
Any tiny little crumb I find on the floor


4. Do you have a Valentine or significant other??
No..... :(

5. Do you get Table Scraps?
Nope.... I don't even know what table food is... I did get a piece of cake for my brother's birthday, though :)

6. What is your favorite toy?
Whichever toy one of my brother's is playing with


7. When is your Birthday?
July 15, 2008

8. How many times a day do you get to eat?
Breakfast and dinner

9. Do you have a favorite color?
Orange

10. Do you hope all your pals put this in their diary?
Oh, I know they will...Everyone is such a good sport about stuff like this!!! Have fun fur-friends!!!!xoxox....

I sent this to
Sadie Boo
Lady Sophie
Jessie
Squeek

My First Valentine's Day!!

My first Valentine's day is coming!!! I'm sooo excited!! I am part of the secret valentines exchange for Pugapalooza so I get so sent a valentine to a girlie pug!! I'm not telling who... It's a secret! She is a cutie, though. I wonder who got me???
Valentine's Day is also mom and dad's wedding anniversary! They will be married one year! Mom says she should get 2 presents but dad says 1 is enough :(

Little ole' me

Ok..Mom need to realize how tiny I am. The clothes she buys for me are always too BIG. My pj's hang off me and the hood of my sweater is WAY toooo big... I can't see. When I had that on I kept walking into things. Bandit thought I was a toy and tried to carry me around in his mouth...not fun. I don't think I should be wearing clothes to begin with. But mom swears it will keep me nice and warm (when is it summer??). I hate wearing them. I fight with her when she's dressing me. But she's bigger.... so she wins :(

Football tag!!

Alright Pal! You made it here. I see you caught my foot ball pass. Here is what you should do next! Hurry and pass the ball to 11 of your team mates so they can make a touch down! You are also suppose to write down 5 things about yourself that are funny. Also please leave me a bone and ask all those who visit your diary to leave you a bone so you will know they have been there ok! OK Here goes the play!

1. I make soounds similar to a gremlin :)
2. I am the Slowest eater EVER!!
3. I would rather be with mommy than my brothers.
4. I am afraid of the outside.
5. I can bite REALLY hard!

I tagged:
Duke
Tinkerbelle
Sadie
Teddy
Murphy
Jack
Tank
Maxie
Rosie
Arwen
Squeek

Bandit's 8th Birthday!!

Happy Birthday to YOU!!
Happy Birthday to YOU!!
Happy Birthday to BANDIT!!
Happy Birthday to YOU!!

Since it's my brother's birthday, does that mean I have to be nice to him?????

Mommy

I WUV my mommy soooo much..... But today she is cranky! She is sick. She's coughing everywhere! I don't want to catch it!!!
She's talking all funny, too...Like all muffy sounding.....I don't know....She HAS to get better soon!! We need to eat and go outside and get COOKIES!! If she is sick.....who will do those things for us???? (yeah, yeah there is always daddy, but he is at work ALL day...that's no good for me....I need attention and cookies all the time!)

Tag again!

I'm it again! 7 more things about me...
1. I hate wearing my sweater.
2. I chew on mommy's slippers when she isn't looking ;)
3. I make REALLY FUNNY noises when I am dreaming...
4. I try to get in the dishwasher when it's open
5. I love to sleep on my back with all 4 legs in the air.
6. When Bandit runs faster than me I cry...
7. I have no fur on my belly...

Your turn...
make a diary entry with 7 things about you. Then pmail 7 of your pals. Tell them to read your diary and then they write their own diary entry with 7 things about them and they sent it to 7 of their pals and so on.
Oh, I think I made this sound more confusing than it really is.......

Winter

This is my first winter....I have decided I don't like it one bit. My little toes are soooo cold (I will NOT wear booties). I want to go somewhere nice and warm....
I will not go outside, no,no, no. My mommy has to carry me out. But as soon as she puts me down, I run back to the door! My little legs move faster than her's!
It really needs to be warm...Why doesn't she understand I'm so cold?
Well untill she does... Iguess I'll just go to the bathroom on the floor when she isn't looking (haha)....

New food!!

I discovered the BEST food!! My mom puts it outside in these things that hang from the trees. (I don't know why....maybe so I don't eat it all at once?) It is very tiny (perfect for me), little pieces of different color stuff. It falls on the ground when those pesky birds try to eat it.....they better not eat it all or they will have to deal with me (I may be small but I'm bigger than them). But it's all over the ground!! My own personal doggie buffet!! It's great! My mom tells me not to eat it .(why does she leave it there for me then?) I don't listen to her at all. I keep munching away at it....oh so go0d! She has to come outside and pick me up to get me to stop eating......But I want MORE!!!!!!