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From the Hound's Mouth

Mom might be loosing it...

This morning mom went to work without showering. I thought she was a little stinky, but I didn't want to say anything and hurt her feelings. When she gave me my treats, she told me "I'll see you in an hour, Evie." An hour? So not only is mom boycotting bathing, she doesn't even know how long she works? I was starting to get worried about mom's mental health, but why worry when there is rawhide to chew...

Well imagine my surprise, when 40 minutes later a giant zebra appears in front of my house and mom spills out its side! I was thrilled to see my mom and relieved that she survived being eaten by a zebra. I gave mom lots of helicopter tail, bows, and even a big kiss.

So any advice about what to do about a mentally unstable mom who gets eaten by herbivores?

Thanks,
Evie Petunia

[Disclaimer from Rachel: I didn't shower because I was just dropping my car off at the dealership for some work. I always shower before work. And yes, I work 10 hour days, not 1 hour days. And I took the dealership shuttle, which is painted with zebra stripes, home so I didn't have to wait around while they work on my car.]

Blessing of the Pets

Yesterday mom took me to synagogue for the 3rd Annual Blessing of the Pets. She told me that the rabbi had invited all the pets in the congregation to come for a celebration of our non-human family members. I’d never met a rabbi before, but I REALLY like rabbits, and there is only one letter difference between rabbi and rabbit, so I figured rabbis must be pretty cool. Well let me be the first to tell you that rabbis are NOTHING like rabbits! I mean, the rabbi was really nice and gave good pets, but he is not the least bit fuzzy. And I bet he doesn’t even squeak if you bite him. I was thinking about testing this theory when two girls arrived with 3 chickens and a duck! Boy did they look tasty! Mom told me that I am only allowed to eat chickens when they are properly cooked, and made me stand as far away from them as possible for the group picture. Party pooper!

It was still fun, even if I didn't get to eat a chicken. I met other Chewish dogs, got complimented on my coat, got lots of pets, got blessed, and mom told me three reasons why she loves me. It must have been hard to choose only three! The rabbi even told everyone about my racing carreer.

Gifts from Above

Dear Fairy Dogmother,

Thank you very much for the partially chewed rawhide chip you left for me to find on my walk. I was only 20 feet from my front yard when I discovered this special gift on the sidewalk. I snatched it up and pranced to the park across the street with it in my mouth. I lay down in the grass and fallen leaves to chew.

Unfortunately my mama had other ideas. Something about getting exercise on my walk and not sitting around chewing in 35 degree weather. Mothers!

Mom took away my rawhide and we kept walking, but miraculously it reappeared on the side walk right before we got back to the house. Not once, but twice you made my dreams come true, Fairy Dogmother!

Thank you, thank you, thank you. I promise to continue to be a good Petunia, so you can keep the treats coming!

Love and squirrels,
Evie Petunia