September 30th 2009 5:29 pm
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Today was great. We all got to share Mom for an hour at a time. She would just hold us and love us and talk to us and we just loved on her and I could tell that it really helped Mom. I know her pain level is bad and I gave her lots of kisses. It is my turn right now and she is going to keep doing it the rest of today. She always loves us and we her but today it was just a day to love us and I am all for that. My Mom is everything to me. She is my life!
I love you Mom!
July 11th 2009 6:18 pm
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I hope nobody thought we were being rude last diary entry. We have appreciated everything so much. The wonderful support and love and the best friendships ever. Mom is in so much pain and she is very depressed and tired of the pain because she knows it's not like it will ever go away. It's always here and it's getting worse. Don't ever take for granted good health or pain free. When you have pain or bad health you may as well have nothing. No matter how many pills Mom takes this pain will not go away and she feels like she is going completely crazy. I'm so sorry. I need to vent. I need to try and figure out how to deal with this pain. I had so much mental pain as a child but this physical pain is too much. No one should ever have to go through this, maybe only killers, and child abusers and animal abusers. That is all and terrorists too.
July 10th 2009 9:49 pm
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I know for a long time Mom has been going down hill and she comes here and she always gets so much love and support but Mom is giving up the fight. Today she told Dad that she couldn't stand this pain anymore and she was tired of ruining Dads life too. She is basically very tired of pain 24/7 and it gets worse and no amount of medications help. She told Dad she wishes God would take her and she would be out of her misery. If anyone reads this plesse don't leave comments. I know you mean well and you have helped tremendously it's just is making Mom more sad now. She doesn't want more pain meds and she doesn't want sympathy...she just wants to be free pain. Now she is afraid she is going to end up in a crazy home because it is so stressful. She can't sleep, she can't eat, it is very hard and sad.
If any one wants to do anything pray for my Mom.
She needs lots of prayers...
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