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The Trials and Tribulations of Linus Solomon Greene

Living with a Stroller

Well, it's been about two months since this darn stroller came onto the walk scene in my life. Bark!

There's a real pro and con at work here, and I'm not sure which side of the dog-door I come down on.

On one paw, I'm getting major walk time. Seriously. Woof! I mean every morning AND some nights. I'm the king of my neighborhood! Dogs must think my scent is omni-present.

On the other paw, that stroller can really get in the way. Sometimes I sniff something really peculiar on the street, I lower my schnauz and WHAM. Stroller wheel to the ribs.

Gruff!

All in all, I think it's not bad. Excercise that is.

And, that thing in the stroller is always good for an hourly dropped food and cracker. And you can't shake a tail at that!

Bark!

I'm letting you in on my secret

Fellow dogs of California do I have a tip for you.

Ruff.

Forget about running free at dog parks, screw those greenies that you occassionally get as treats. What I'm about to let you in on is even better than oven-roasted beef rib bones still warm from cooking. Believe it.

I have found a source of happiness and enjoyment that will raise the spirit of even the most down-trodden Basset Hound.

The joy of antagonizing!

Bark! Bark! Bark!

Just the other day I was on a walk, and I sniffed a poor lab (Black from the smell of things) behind a gate. Whoa boy, did the fun begin then.

I barked and scratched 'til I was out of breath, and all that caged dog could do was whimper. I'll tell you, antagonizing dogs in houses and behind doors is the bestest thing ever.

Woof!

I've developed a list of where the target dogs are in my neighborhood, and now every morning walk is just a matter of walking from one source of happiness to the other.

Grrr.
Sniff.

I think I smell a bone coming out of the oven...

Talk later.

Ruff.

What a drag it is getting old

Awooooo!

I went to the dog park yesterday, and I'm not the Bulldog I used to be. Two hearty sprints after some dirty and smelly border collie and I had enough.

I'll tell you, the dog park ain't what it used to be. Bark! It used to be an oasis of grass frequented by dogs who knew how to behave. These new, young pups are so unrefined. I saw one dog bark just because I was getting love from his owner, I'll tell you that behaviour is so 1985. Woof Woof!

The best part of the dog park is running full tilt into a dog three times my size. I'll tell you the higher they are, the easier they fall. Heh. That reminds me of an early dog park adventure I had when I mistook a small human for a Bull Mastiff. At least she wasn't vindictive.

Anyway. Woof! Woof! Woof! After the park I pretty much slept all day. My dad watched his football team, which meant my sleep was pretty much full of interruptions. But, what's a purebred bulldog to do.

I'm off to lie in hiding, waiting, planning for that poor mailman.