Dogster

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Bizkit's Bytes

Westminster

I was helping my mom watch the Westminster Dog Show and she was pointing out the puggy to me. She was pointing and saying, "Look at the pug, Bizkit!" I looked behind both sides of the TV but couldn't see it anywhere, so I fought with Sluggo instead.

MY couch!

Well, the dad was rearranging the living room furniture again, and in the process broke the recliner, so it finally got thrown out. The problem with that is, that left him without his fave seat, so he sat in the loveseat. MY loveseat! I was quite startled to see him there, and reported him to the mom. I whimpered at her but she was pretty unsympathetic, in my opinion. She told me to lie down up there with him, but that's unacceptable! How can I stretch out with him in the way? I love my daddy so much, but a girl's gotta have some legroom. The dad put down a blanket where the recliner used to be, and I thought, oh okay, that's great, he can lie down there. Well, guess what? He was putting that down there for me, not him! Ugh. Why would I want to lie on a floor blankie when there's a perfectly good, comfy loveseat in the very same room? The nerve! I punished the pawrents by leaving the room and snubbing them for the rest of the evening.

More good news from my attorney

Dear Bizkit,

A letter went out to Billy-Goat Butthead today telling him that he had no evidence against you or the other 6 people named in the letter. I told him if he made that kind of threats again we would be taking him to court for slander.
I received a phone call from him and the case is closed. So none of you will have to worry about this any more. Please let your friends know.

Lucky D.
attorney at Law


(Again, Lucky is the best!)