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Tinkerbell's Update

Human dad passes away

My human daddy, Roman passed away on Thurs. Oct 8th at 5:20 am in my human mommy's arms at the Western Reserve Hospice House on E. 185th in Cleveland Ohio. My human dad Roman was in the hospital since Sept. 19th in CCu and had to have surgery on the 23rd. He died from Non-Hodgkins Liver Cancer. I miss him very much and haven't been the same. My kitty sisters and my human mommy and I are grieving and my sugar level is up. I peed on the carpet the day he died while my human mommy was at the funeral parlor that afternoon.
I am keeping my mommy company and have piled all my dog toys on my daddy's side of the bed and lay my head on his pillow. I climb under the covers on my daddy's side to keep it warm. My mommy cries alot and I lick away the salty tears to comfort her. My human parents are still newleyweds that didn't have a honeymoon or reception cause my daddy was sick. They were only married for 9 months. We won't be moving to a new home that they planned and all our dreams went down the toilet. Now I guess its just me, the cats, the pigeon and mommy and we have a big adjustment to go through. It's hard because all of my daddy's stuff is all around and his scent is still present all around.

Tinkerbell's Challenges

Being diagnosed with a chronic illness isn't easy. There are rocky roads and obstacles along the way. The acceptance and adjustment phase takes time and doesn't happen overnight. Illnesses don't come with "instruction manuals". Learning to accept the illness also takes time. The interim period between the acceptance or rejection phase is challenging. Learning to adapt to change isn't easy. I see it as a challenge which requires little steps at a time instead of big leaps. You have to have a plan of action and adjust your goals. Here are my recent ones.
I have adapted quite well with not being able to see. It took time. I went from being hospitalized to being diagnosed with diabetes mellitus. I went from 3 units of insulin twice a day to 9 units of insulin. I started getting cloudy eyes in the beginning to having white eyes and loosing my sight. I used to step on the cats, run into trees, hit doorways, missed jumping on the bed and into the car and walking into my human parents legs and now I don't do it as much. I went from being able to eat whatever I wanted (those basted pig ears, MMMMM!) to having dietary restrictions, which I don't like! I went from 26 pounds and returned to my normal weight of 38-40. I went from being extremely thirsty and peeing alot (having accidents in the house) to quenching my thirst and controlling my bladder. (I don't bark when I have to go, never did unless I had to have an urgent poop!). I used to be able to see the squirrels, deers, birds outside the window and in front of me now I don't. My mommy and daddy think I can see shadows out of one eye or movement because I respond when I look far away and I used to be able to see my kitty sisters paws playing with me, now I don't. I don't like the changes (which have been the obstacles on my path)BUT I'VE LEARNED TO ACCEPT AND ADAPT TO THE CHANGE!
My human mommy and daddy educated themselves and sought resources to help them adapt to my disability. They joined groups to help them with emotional issues to help them cope. They had to adjust by changing the way they did things. It wasn't easy!
Recently, my human father was diagnosed with kidney cancer and last week he was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma of the Liver. He has to start his chemotherapy next week. My parents had to go to classes to learn what to expect and how to adapt. They have a team of people who help them with the financial, emotional, spiritual and educational issues that they face. The road is very rocky ahead and there will be numerous obstacles. ! These obstacles are invisible and come unexpectedly. We've had to prepare ahead and develop a plan of action. We had goals that were set and have had to be adjusted temporarily. Plans had to be put on hold because there was a setback both medically, physically and financially.
We are a family. I have adapted to the change. My parents have accepted and adapted. The obstacles in the road are the challenges which together we can overcome.
I am their angel, their assistant guide and they are mine. I help them alleviated the stress by providing the warmth and companionship that they need. I snuggle with them and kiss them frequently to show them that I love them no matter what. I cannot see their faces to see the heartbroken emotions they display. I don't need to see it, I can hear it in their voice. I know that I am their pillar of strength when they are sad. When they are sad, I don't leave them alone. I am their personal stress reliever, their coping angel who eliminates any fears, anger, sorrow. I am their joy and their life and together we work as a team. We are motivated and determined not to let our illnesses get the best of us and we strive to achieve our goals despite the roadblocks ahead. Our love for eachother is so strong, the bond cannot be broken or taken away. We share our love with others who are ill and need support, which in turn helps us emotionally feel better. We continually seek out the resources available around us and are not afraid to ask for help when we need it. Together as a team we are striving even though there are unexpected circumstances. Our love for eachother helps us strive and grow together as a family and we will continue to grow and learn to achieve what we have set out to accomplish!

My challenges

Having an illness isn't easy. I was hospitalized last spring and was diagnosed as a diabetic and require insulin twice a day. My insulin started at 3 units and is up to 9 units. The first few months after receiving insulin I started to get cloudy eyes and was told that I am developing cataracts. I started bumping and running into things (doorways, trees, tables), stepped on the cats, missed the bed, etc.
I am progressively getting worse with my sight and have become blind. I can hear and smell really good. But,,,,,I cannot see close and can walk up to a squirrel and not see him! My mommy thinks that I can see shadows out of one eye. There is no where for her to take me to get my eyes checked.

My human mom and dad have had to help guide me through the doorways and tighten my leash so I don't run into things. I have adapted pretty well. I don't step on the cats as often. The only thing I don't like is that I cannot see my favorite squirrels, deers, etc. I go for rides and can sniff the air out the window but I cannot see what is outside the window!

Recently my human parents got married in December. I got to kiss the bride on her wedding day....see my picture I attached!

My human father was in the hospital and was diagnosed with kidney cancer and recently Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma and he will be starting Chemotherapy next week. My human mommy was in the hospital this last week and cannot go back to work. She is also chronically ill and has learned to adjust.

We all help eachother. I help both of them by snuggling with them and kissing them which alleviates their stress. They help me by guiding me and teaching me ways to find things. Even though we are facing some challenges, I am happy. I have learned to adapt to the change even though I don't like it and be happy with someone who loves me despite being ill. My parents are struggling financially, but we are managing to keep things together.

We are family. My kitty sisters love me and I love them and so does my pigeon Tweetybyrd. We got a new addition the family recently. Another rescued kitty named CC (Couch Commander). I'm still trying to get used to her. We have a wonderful zoo at home. Now that spring is here I will be able to go for walks and rides in the car. We went out for a few walks and rides so far. I'm glad that I can make other people happy!