Dogster

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OOPS I DID IT AGAIN

The Crate

So I recently got my crate back. It was on loan to my cousin Fez (see my page) but he outgrew it. I never used to need a crate...I used to sleep on mom and dad's bed peacefully, or make rounds of the house. I had free rein, the kingdom was mine. Then one day my humans brought this red ball of fur home. He liked to chew on my tail and pull at my ears...it was mildly annoying. Recently I noticed the red ball of fur they call Flynn had grown, suddenly he was bigger then me. He would not leave me alone, he was just constantly picking at me...biting on my legs, and tail and face, he is really very annoying. So I made a new discovery..I love my crate...it bring me solace, and comfort, and big fluffy pillows. Did I mention it has a gate? That is the best feature of my comfort wagon, no red ball of fur to harass me, peace and quiet at last...zzzzzz.

The Basement

So the last few nights my people have locked me in the basement. Even though the basment has carpet and couches and dog toys I am confident that this is abuse! My mom says that I am keeping the house up with my night time "rounds" (protection and safety come first you know! See my diary on barking). I don't understand what the problem is! I go outside at least three times a night to patrol my yard, and I complete several rounds of the house every night...I am clearly keeping my humans safe! My mom and dad say I am very annoying and I am teaching my puppy Flynn bad habits. Is this just cause for the basement...am I so wrong? Mom won't even let me bark and scratch at the basement door...I am not even allowed that little gesture. Life is tough...I am quite sure I should complain to some agency about this clear case of mistreatment! Until I can learn how to dial the phone I will just sit here and sulk.

Barking

So I like to bark....a lot. I admit I am a horrible guard dog, there have been two car break-ins while I was on the prowl, but it's not for lack of "the bark". I like to bark for all occasions (mostly beacuse it's fun to see my humans frantically yelling at the window and running outside in their pajamas flailing their arms...goood stuff). I bark for treats from my mailman neighbor bob, and I like to bark at the birds, cats and lights in the alley deserve a bark. It goes without saying that dogs walking by deserve a bark, and of course wind...it's very scary and it requires hysterical barks. The best barks are unknown noises in the middle of the night, they deserve frantic barks that will alert my whole house, sometimes it's the furnace going on, but ya just never know do ya? Recently my humans got a second muzzle for me (I ate the first one when they left it vulnerable). This muzzle thing is demeaning, I hang my head and look sorrowfull, but yet I have discovered that with some effort I can still manage to bark! It's not as loud or as incessant, but it's still noise. My humans take turns coming out to scold me as they say my barking is too stressful, and if one has to deal with it repeatedley they might just muzzle me with crazy glue...I think they're joking...I'm pretty sure they are. Did I mention I love to bark!