Chief Executive - Scooter Squarepants.

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Stink like dog.

March 8th 2008 1:51 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

Mom - when you wrinkle your nose and say "You stink like dog".

Not an insult.

Just wanted you to know.

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

 

A Request from Scooter. Think good things for my sister- Misty.

March 7th 2008 9:10 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

Mom was all happy on the Misty entry tonight, but that was because she didn't want Misty to know she was going back to the VET tomorrow. So now you get the real 'Scoop' from 'Scooter'. hmmm this sounds like a 'Scooter Scoop' ...or does that sound like I've just been on a dog walk BOL?

Mom thinks Misty has bladder stones again. Which seems horrible since she just had surgery pre Santapaws time. And to be as big as they are - mom says peas & carrotts don't even grow that fast. I had my paw on them - and as the Prince dog I am - they are like a pea 14 of the 7 mattresses below what I am sleeping on.

Keep your paws crossed for my sister Misty.

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

 

Addendum to the Neighbourly Bark Column of before.

March 5th 2008 10:24 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

Another thing to keep in mind to avoid the bark frenzy.

DO NOT - rent a movie that starts out w/ dogs that are in a park barking. How are we to know?
DO NOT - rent a movie that within the first 10 minutes the cute dog in the beginning dies. Your mom cries + more dog barking.
DO NOT - rent a movie that depicts a lady, work, dogs, and not much else. At the wrong emotional interpretation, more tears + more dog barking.
DO NOT - rent a movie that touches on animal abuse, cruelty and a focus to heal what you can, or cannot. This makes mom bawl some more + more dogs bark.

DO WATCH - 'The Year of the Dog'.
++If only as a Scooter dog you want lots and lots of hugs and sniffle squeezing. I'm a boy and like my belly rubbed - I'll sit through pretty much anything. BOL.

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

 

Neighborhood Watch Dog.

March 5th 2008 4:00 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

I can tell by the look in her eyes, mom is getting a little peeved at me and my sister. You see the weather is getting warmer and it is staying light out later, and we've forgotten all our outside summer manners. We are barking fools when you let us out. Mom is NOT happy! We know this because last night *GASP* she showed us the bark collars. You know she has hit her limit when those are brought out from the dark corner of the SNACK cabinet.

This morning after our spaz out with the nice neighbor dog across the fence, mom told us we'd better get our act together by the time she gets home from work. I'd like to point out the true mission we are on as we bark out our warnings.

**The neighbor dog through the fence - the nice one. We're just saying hi.
**The neighbor dogs through the fence - the mean ones. We're just saying stop trying to sound so mean.
**The EVIL NEMESIS SQUIRRELS - we are saving your life and our yard from these rodents w/ puffy tails. We hear they carry disease AND you are so very upset with them when they dig up your bulbs. See mom we are helping you garden, but draw the line at pulling weeds - no thumbs.
**The loud truck that goes by. Just telling you there might be company coming.
**The neighbors who smoke out on their front porch and talk. Just passing along that there might be intruders lurking around.
**The doorbell on TV. Hey we can't help it if commercials are encouraging bad behavior.
**The door knock for the pizza commercials. Reminding you that you do need to eat dinner at night - and perhaps Pizza will be your choice?
**The neighbor dog a couple streets over that is barking to us. We are just passing along what he has to say to the neighbor dog a couple other streets over. We are the go between for gossip.
**The squealing kids from up the hill. Ok - that's because the squealing hurts our ears - stop little kids, stop!

So mom, before you get your panties all up in a bunch, re-read the above. We only have your best interest at heart when we bark alert the neighborhood. Before you go slapping those bark collars on us (thanks for not turning them on though, you are such a wuss!) please keep in mind that we do it all for the love of YOU.

That's our story and we're sticking to it.

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

P.S. I, Misty, endorce the above statement(s) to be true.

 

Scooter's Rules of Bathtaking.

March 4th 2008 6:32 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

Mom must have read where I was so proud that we didn't get a bath last weekend either. That's 3 weekends in a row. Because next thing I know Misty is headed off to the kitchen and there is a towel on the floor. Never a good sign.

Sure enough, I was next.

So mom, since you gave us a bath so late I just want to point out the following things that should be acceptable for after the faucet spits all over us.

1. Shaking in the sink is acceptable. Deal with the mess.
2. Rubbing our wet body all over the only room with carpet is acceptable. It's not like it's in 1 spot - we scoot all over that floor.
3. Laying on the bed while the other sibling is getting a bath is acceptable. Just helping to scent the bed a little faster.
4. Getting rambunctious after the bath and being rowdy is acceptable. What can we say? The bath "stimulated" us.
5. Any clean clothes you leave on the bed in a pile are open game for making a snuggly bed. Hey, we're not the pigs here that just threw the clothes on top of the bed.

That's a start for now. I'm sure as you continue this torture in the future that I'll come up with more. I'd appreciate if you would read the above and sign below at the "X". Thank you.

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

**I hearby (state your name) have read the above and promise to uphold the agreed upon terms. Violation of any of the above terms and conditions will be punishable immediately. Penalties to be applied according to gross negligence level of above terms.

X___________________

Hey mom - how come you didn't sign it?? Wait. Come back here! I can't sign it for you - no thumbs....

 

We Escaped the Bath Again this Weekend!

March 2nd 2008 8:32 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

I'm not sure how we did it other than mom has been very busy this weekend doing stuff. We managed to escape a bath this weekend even though mom did the bed stuff. That always means we have to get wet and have stuff rubbed into our fur, all just to get wet again.

I will tell you the scratches in between the getting wet part aren't so bad, but not worth getting wet in the first place.

She says we stink like dog. Well we say she stinks like human. And we like that smell. So she must like our smell. Which must be why we didn't get a bath this weekend.

See mom - I knew you would see our way of thinking.

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

 

I sleep on clean sheets.

March 1st 2008 9:37 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

Joy today.

Mom did the bed stuff.

I layed on warm comforter until the sheets were dry.

Then I snuggled into the fresh made bed.

Life is Scooter good!

Sniff at when I wake up ~Scooter~

 

Running Errands is not the same as going to the Dog Park!

March 1st 2008 9:11 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

Ran "errands" with mom today. I've decided this task is not as fun as going to visit friends or the dog park.

First off. Errands involves driving around - yea! It also involves stopping - yea! Unfortunately it also involves not letting Scooter out when the door opens. What's up with that?

The man working at the gas station while you filled the car up w/ food. He scared us. Why did he start talking to you when we didn't even know he was there? Talk about scary!

Then the grocery store run. Putting stuff in the back of the car where we can sniff the fresh bread and then leaving. How fun is that for us?

Finally on the road again. What - another stop? I can't get out? But that pizza you just put in the trunk smells so good.

Movies - you stopped to get some movies? I'd better get some serious lap time out of the fact that you are not cooking dinner - and you have movies to walk.

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

 

Flea or Freckle?

March 1st 2008 12:24 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

Does anyone else have a spot on their belly that your mom constantly does a double take on? Mine I guess, looks like a flea. Mom is always scratching at it to see if it will move - but it never does.

I told you I didn't have fleas mom. And I don't stink and need a bath either.

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

 

Trying to talk mom into....

February 29th 2008 6:46 pm
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Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

Trying to talk mom into getting rid of my sister BOL.

Why? you ask.

Because she just ran off with my Greenie I'd been saving under the blanket.

I looked at mom like what the?

And looked at my sister like you little!

Mom laughed and said oh Scooter. And I still haven't been able to sit on moms lap yet tonight.

Off to chase some kitties through the house! Somehow I have to be the boss of something.

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

 
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