I've been Violated!! In the rudest sort of way.

Hey everypup ~Scooter here~

I have to tell you all it has been a rough week!! I do not EVER want to relive this week again in my whole dog life!! It was horrible and I may never recover.

I haven't been feeling so good for the past couple days. Just laying around and not interested in anything. Not even scratches or lap time. Those of you who know me know that is an immediate sign that something is not right in the Scooter World.

I haven't been pooping. I was a little stuffed up.

Sure, I'd try. And try. And try. And try some more. Even turn around to check the progress out - but nothing.

Oh what a miserable feeling.

So mom took me to Dr. B the dog doctor. Now let me tell you, I really like this guy and the place. I've only had to go in support of my sister after her surgery and such. Oh and the time I got stuck with the needle. But that didn't matter because the lady that gave them to me was so in LOVE with me , Scooter, that I didn't really mind.

It all started out good. I strutted in the door and another little dog and her human mom were in the front room. Mom wouldn't let me close to the other dog because it was recovering just like Misty was after her surgery. Although let me tell you - I sure did try. Well the other lady sure puffed my head up by telling me how cute I was and on and on and on. Mom told me later she wanted to barf. I looked at her and she didn't look queasy at all so I think she was pulling my leg.

We went into the special room to see the doctor and this time I was up on the table. The nice lady from the front came in and took me to the scale. Mom guessed 12.3 lbs and she was so WRONG! Only 11.8 lbs. Which isn't good news since a year ago I was 10.4 lbs. It's all that good food that Misty has to eat now from the doctor - it's high in calories. And we all know how I like to sleep in. Eat right before bed and then go straight to sleep.

The doctor checked me out and told me how cute I was. If I didn't feel so backed up this would be shaping up to be a wonderful day. There was discussion on weight issues. Otherwise temperature normal. But I was full in my glands. They would have to be expressed. Not knowing what I was in for - I headed right out that door with that nice doctor man.

Let me tell you - I expressed my unhappiness in what that man did to me outside of my mom's presence. I can only assume (ha get it BOL) mom did not know what I was in for or she never would have released me into the clutches of the torture chamber.

I squealed and screamed and whined. That team of humans invaded my nether region 3 times. Let me tell you again. 3 TIMES!!

After the humans had decided the torture had lasted long enough I was back with my mom. I ran and hid behind her and did not want to look at the doctor at all. I'm pretty sure I don't like him as much as Misty says she doesn't like him. Mom says he's perfectly nice, knows what he's doing and has a fondness for Papillons since he takes an agility class with one.

After he filled my mom full of some story on how full I was and that he didn't have big fingers - Dude I so disagree - look at it from my point of view. But that I was very full. I had a cortizone shot to help with the discomfort. He also shaved up my bum. Mom said next time (NEXT TIME????) if he's got the shaver out to do my belly too. Mom sure is in a weird sense of humor today.

Dr. B was concerned that mom was thinking he was really hurting me. Well he was - don't listen to him mom. Didn't you hear me squeal like a stuck Scooter? Mom laughed and said not at all. She was actually sharing a laugh with the front desk lady. She said she was actually sorry she forgot to tell them I was a complete wuss.

You know what I did. I peed on that lady vet tech that was helping the doctor preform horrible things to the other side of me. Since I hadn't really gotten out of bed and done the morning ritual - I had a lot in me. A Lot! Perhaps when I can walk without a hitch in my giddy-up I might feel sorry for that. But for right now - she totally deserved it.

And mom - I'm actually GLAD you have to put cream on my bum twice a day. HA!

Sniff at ya later ~Scooter~

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