IT'S ALL ABOUT ME!!!

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I was a bad girl yesterday....YET AGAIN!!

June 16th 2009 12:42 pm
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As some of you might know, our grandmom is visiting us to give mom's sister a break from taking of grandmom 24/7, and since mama isn't working right now, its working out good.

So, yesterday we had some visitors to see grandmom and one of them brought mom some sugar free jelly beans!!! OH-MY-DOG!! Grandmom ate a few and then everyone went on about their business and the company left.

Well, after awhile mom had followed grandmom to help her into her nightgown, and was gone - ohhhh, maybe 2 minutes- then she came and checked on me and Austin and I had taken that whole bag of jelly beans off the back of the couch (mom thinks this is a safe place--like I can't reach it--MOM GET A CLUE!! I CAN!!) and was in the middle of the living room with some of them beans all spread out -- boy they sure were pretty and I KNOW they HAD to taste good too!! Unfortunately, for me, they were individually wrapped! Well I never! Who individually wraps jelly beans--we know them Easter Bunnies don't at Easter time!! So mom grabbed them up--I didn't even get to eat not even ONE (although one was pretty soggy from me chomping on it but couldn't get through the paper fast enough, and the bag was pretty wet with spit too). Mom was sooooooooo mad she hollered at me and was ready to pull my ears off, but threw me outside instead...yeah, like that'll teach me--BOL!!

I just can't help myself--if there is food to be found I WILL find it and do my darndest to eat it up, whatever it may be, before mom finds out. Remember I ate some chocolate covered peanuts a few weeks ago. Well, hey mom, don't leave food out where I can reach it. If you feel this is a problem, then maybe you should get a smaller dog! Like that'll happen! When pigs fly!! BOL

 

Ice Cream Flavor...

June 15th 2009 9:17 am
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My good Friend Bella tagged me (after I had tagged her) in the ice cream game.


What kind of ice cream are you ?

Here we go......

I am going to tag six friends and tell them what kind of ice cream I look like. Then they tag six of their friends to tell what kind of ice cream they look like! Sprinkles count too!


I think I look like creamy licorice ice cream.

I'm going to tag:

Tucker
Po
Kacie
Wyatt
Comet
Boston

 

Ice Cream Flavor...

June 15th 2009 9:15 am
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My good Friend Prada tagged me (after I had tagged her) in the ice cream game.


What kind of ice cream are you ?

Here we go......

I am going to tag six friends and tell them what kind of ice cream I look like. Then you tag six of your friends and tell them to tell you what kind of ice cream you look like! Sprinkles count too!


I think I look like creamy licorice ice cream.

I'm going to tag:

Tucker
Po
Kacie
Wyatt
Comet
Boston

 

Take this survey and then ask your friends to take it too

June 14th 2009 10:10 pm
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Take this survey and send me your answers (or you can post them in your diary like I did so everyone can read about you)

What is your name? Doodle Masters (although the people that had me before mom called me SnickerDoodle, but mom just dropped the Snicker)

What other nicknames do you have? Doo, Doodie, (many others that aren't printable)

What breed are you? Weimaraner

Where were you born? San Antonio, TX

Where do you live now? San Antonio, TX


What is your favorite toy? all the stuffy ones are my favorite and I always have one in my mouth when I get around mom--I've even been known to take them to bed with me

What is your favorite store? Probably a place like Petsmart where there is lots of treats and food to choose from

How many toys do you have? we have alot,

What brand of food do you eat? Me personally, I'm a chow hound so I'll eat any kind, but Austin is picky so mom gets us Regular Flavor Beneful

Wet or dry food? dry

What is your favorite color? I think pink looks good with grey and thats the color of my collar and leash

Are you bad when nobody's looking? YES and even when they are looking!

Are you friendly? Very much so!

Are you overweight? Yes, mama calls me a chubba butt

Do you eat people food? Yes but not on a regular basis, just sniks and snacks mom gives me and she always lets me lick her plate.

Do you eat bugs? I don't think so

Do you live with other animals? yes..my brother Austin

Do you like to exercise? I like to roughhouse if thats considered exercising and will chase after a ball if mom throws it but not for long cause its too hot and fat dogs can't run for long.

Do you like car rides? Not particularly...I'm very tense and mom doesn't take me often

Do you get into stuff? Any chance I get!!

Do you like to swim? Mom doesn't know--we don't have a pool or live near water

What is your favorite treat? all treats are my fav

Do you shed? some, but no where near as bad as Austin

What's the funniest thing you ever did? I don't know that I do anything funny, although mom thinks its funny when she sneeks up on me and it scares me cause I'm not expecting it.

What's the bravest thing you ever did? I kill birds that get in our yard to protect mom

Are you neutered? yep (spayed)

Are you a social animal? Yes

Collar or harness? None, but I do have a pink collar if we need to go somewhere.

Retractable or regular leash? regular

Ceramic, Metal or Plastic bowls? metal

Do you sleep in a crate? no we don't own one,

Do you have a dog bed? no, I sleep in bed with mom

Do you have a doghouse? yes, the house we live in is the doghouse and we just let mom stay here to take care of us. There's 2 outside but we have NEVER used them (they're there from the previous dogs that used to live here before we came along)

Do you belong to any dog clubs? lots...

How does your owner describe you? Sometimes she can't come up with words to describe me, but mischief maker or busy body are used frequently.

 

What kind of ice cream are you??

June 14th 2009 3:30 pm
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My brother Austin tagged me with a new game. What kind of ice cream are you?

I am going to tag five friends and tell them what kind of ice cream I look like. Then you tag five of your friends and tell them what kind of ice cream you look like! Sprinkles count too!

I think I look like a light creamy licorice flavor.

I'm gonna tag:

My boyfriend Tank
DD
Prada
Bella
Benji
TaZ
Chanel

Ok, so I added a few more--;o)

 

Ya'll need to go check out this video...

June 10th 2009 4:41 pm
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Mom found this video (its from You Tube) and thought it was funny and wanted to share. Its what happens when the parents are away at work...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPZcMuR8Hg0

 

The Story of Adam and Eve's Pets

June 5th 2009 8:52 am
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Adam and Eve said, 'Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us.'

And God said, I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourselves.'

And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and Eve. And it was a good animal And God was pleased.

And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve and he wagged his tail .

And Adam said, 'Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal.'

And God said, 'I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG.'



And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them and loved them.

And they were comforted
And God was pleased.
And Dog was content and wagged his tail.


After a while, it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord and said, 'Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocks and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved, but perhaps too well.'

And God said, I will create for them a companion who will be with them and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not always worthy of adoration..'

And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.

And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam and Eve gazed into Cat's eyes, they were reminded that they were not the supreme beings.

And Adam and Eve learned humility.

And they were greatly improved.

And God was pleased . . . .. .

And Dog was happy. . . . .




And CAT, being of the nature of cats, couldn't care less one way or another!

 

Doggie Dictionary

June 5th 2009 8:47 am
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Doggie Dictionary

Bath:
This is a process by which the humans drench the floor, walls and themselves. You can help by shaking vigorously and frequently.

Bicycles:
Two-wheeled exercise machines, invented for dogs to control body fat. To get maximum aerobic benefit, you must hide behind a bush and dash out, bark loudly and run alongside for a few yards; the person then swerves, and falls into the bushes, and you prance away.

Bump:
The best way to get your human's attention when they are drinking a fresh cup of coffee or tea.

Deafness:
This is a malady which affects dogs when their person wants them in and they want to stay out. Symptoms include staring blankly at the person, then running in the opposite direction, or lying down.

Dog Bed:
Any soft, dean surface, such as the white bedspread in the guest room or the newly upholstered couch in the living room.

Drool:
Is what you do when your persons have food and you don't. To do this properly, you must sit as close as you can and look sad and let the drool fall to the floor, or better yet, on their laps.


Garbage Can:
A container which your neighbors put out once a week to test your ingenuity. You must stand on your hind legs and try to push the lid off with your nose. If you do it right, you are rewarded with margarine wrappers to shred, beef bones to consume and moldy crusts of bread.

Goose Bump:
A maneuver to use as a lest resort when the Regular Bump doesn't get the attention you require,....especially effective when combined with The Sniff. See below.

Lean:
Every good dog's response to the command "sit!", especially if your person is dressed for an evening out. Incredibly effective before black-tie events.

Leash:
A strap which attaches to your collar, enabling you to lead your person where you want him/her to go.

Love:
Is a feeling of intense affection, given freely and without restriction. The best way you can show your love is to wag your tail. If you're lucky, a human will love you in return.

Sniff:
A social custom to use when you greet other dogs. Place your nose as close as you can to the other dog's rear end and inhale deeply, repeat several times, or until your person makes you stop.

Sofas:
Are to dogs like napkins are to people. After eating, it is polite to run up and down the front of the sofa and wipe your whiskers clean.

Thunder:
This is a signal that the world is coming to an end. Humans remain amazingly calm during thunderstorms, so it is necessary to warn them of the danger by trembling uncontrollably, panting, rolling your eyes wildly, and following at their heels. Let's not forget exiting via windows, chewing door frames and clawing every door in the house!

Wastebasket:
This is a dog toy filled with paper, envelopes, and old candy wrappers. When you get bored, turn over the basket and strew the papers all over the house until your person comes home.

 

The Story of Creation

June 5th 2009 8:45 am
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The Story of Creation...
According to Snoopy

On the first day of creation,
God created the dog.

On the second day,
God created man to serve the dog.

On the third day,
God created all the animals of the earth
to serve as potential food for the dog.

On the fourth day,
God created honest toil so that man
could labor for the good of the dog.

On the fifth day,
God created the tennis ball so that
the dog might or might not retrieve it.

On the sixth day,
God created veterinary science to keep
the dog healthy and the man broke.

On the seventh day,
God tried to rest,
but He had to walk the dog.

Author Unknown

 

Open letter to my dog

June 5th 2009 8:43 am
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An Open Letter to My Dog (The Bad One)
To: My basset hound

DEAR Jasper: I realize that, being a basset hound, it is highly unlikely you will actually read today's column, but at this point I've run out of ideas for communicating with you and am pretty much willing to try anything.

So, let's consider this an intervention. What I'm trying to say is your recent behaviour has been less than acceptable, not that your track record is anything to brag about.

Do I need to remind you about that Christmas fiasco? That's right, the time you found a 20-pound sack of flour in the kitchen, ripped it open, ate about five pounds worth, then gulped down your entire water dish and rolled in the rest of the flour to ensure you were evenly coated in a thick, white, dripping mass of glue, which you then tracked throughout the living room while testing out the new leather sofa and every single chair to see which was the most comfortable.

But that's ancient history. I think we can agree things have been sort of going downhill from there. Just for fun, why don't we start with what you did in the living room yesterday.

Can you show me in the Official Dog Handbook the part where it says: After eating a bunch of grass and the remains of a dead squirrel, never throw up outside if there's a perfectly good carpet in the living room.

Hey, there's more to life than food! I'm serious. You can't eat everything. For example, and this will be a big surprise, Kleenex, paper towels, discarded "hygiene" products, small pieces of wood and plastic bags from Safeway are not considered edible.

Do you have any idea how many fancy-schmancy, high-tech garbage containers we have bought in a vain search for one can -- one (very bad word) can -- that you CAN'T tip over or pry open on the off chance it might be full of yummy coffee grounds, eggshells or mould-coated things from the back of the fridge?

And do you really think we don't know what's been happening to the butter? Oh, yeah, like I really believe the kids have forgotten how to use knives and have been climbing up on the kitchen counter and using their tongues to lathe the butter into a disgusting, albeit very smooth, little blob.

Look, none of this would bother me so much if just once -- one (very bad word) time -- you would just look at me and say: 'Hey, my bad!' Or: 'Sorry, I just sort of lost control!'

But, NO! Whenever we catch you red-handed, you just sit there with that stunned ('Who? Me?') once-again-I-am-unjustly-accused look on your droopy mug, as if butter wouldn't melt in your mouth (which it does).

And have you noticed how no one wants to take you for a walk anymore? Why? Because you don't walk. No, using the same gravitational pull as the space shuttle, you try to yank our skeletons out through our armpits. ("OHMYGAWD! LOOK OVER THERE!! IT'S A SQUIRREL!!!")
What I want to know is why you can't be more like those dogs we see on TV. Not Lassie or Rin Tin Tin. I mean heroic dogs we see on the news, like that black Lab down in Maine who grabbed his owner by the arm last week and pulled him out of a burning house.

But you don't have time for stuff like that. You devote all your mental energy to breaking out of the backyard by ramming through rotten boards in the fence. The neighbours don't like that. They are cat people. Their cat hates you! That's why he hisses at you all the time.

(Just so you know, that fire that I mentioned a moment ago was caused -- and I do not think The Associated Press would make this up -- by a cat named Princess who tipped over a kerosene lamp. I'm just saying.)

You appear to have modelled yourself after Pepper, that Lab-shepherd cross in Wisconsin who, according to AP, got into his owner's purse and wolfed down $750.

On the upside, the family -- and they wisely wore rubber gloves to do this -- was able to recover and wash off $647 that Pepper kindly "deposited" in their backyard, if you get my general drift.

Maybe I'm being a little harsh here; I don't think I'd be mentioning any of this if it wasn't for that little incident with the wiener dog on Friday. You need to realize that you are roughly 10 times bigger than the wiener dog and, under the laws of physics, the two of you cannot occupy the same space at the same time.

That's why, when the two of you tried to run in the back door together, you managed to bodycheck the wiener dog off the top step, causing her to cartwheel in mid-air and land in the planter on the patio.

Not that you've asked, but, other than a slight limp, the wiener dog is going to be just fine. The vet bill, however, cost me $77. And guess who I think should pay for that?

If you're smart, I think you'll contact your buddy Pepper down in Wisconsin. I hear he's still sitting on a little cash.

P.S. Would you please stop licking yourself while I'm talking to you!

 
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