STUPID SPRING

Okay i know it ISN'T summer yet, but i'm preparing!
I am uber excited!
(You think i'm cool now don't you?? cause i used the word 'uber'? right? am i right?)
It will be an OVER the top Summer!
WAYYYYYY WAYYYYY better than being watched after by the cleaning lady while my Mom goes on vaca.!
THEY'RE TAKING ME!
I'm going to the BEACH!
Now, i've googled the beach, and as far as i can tell, it is a giant sand box, people turn red, Most humans shed most of their fur, humans jump in the water, and there are trees that grow kibble!
SOUNDS LIKE HEAVEN TO ME!
If any of you dogs knows anything else i should know about "Beach" please don't hesitate!
So, i guess i'll have to settle with STUPID Spring.
sigh.
sigh.
sigh-i-dee sigh sigh.
Is spring over yet?

CAT catastrofy, U.S.A. Papillons,

Lets start off on the first thing, CAT. I'm really not to clear on who CAT is, but my cousin, Beau (the one who's still alive), lives(ed)with CAT before, and well, i've been to his house, i've seen that CAT and i've touched it too, but thats why i'm worried. CAT at Beau's house is really not like dogs at all. His name is Fuzzy, and he is really old and cranky,(kind of like beau acts towards me), he seemed timid and kind, but maybe because he was flinching. when i poked that lint brush, it felt like furry jello, so i did it again, and again, and- and then he went all "HIIICKKSSKSKSK" and started to try to attack me! I NEVER EVER wanted to see Another CAT again! Just my luck, when my owner picke dme up from my cousin's house, i heard her talking about "Rescueing a kitten" or something, later on, i figured out that "kitten" ment CAT in some other laungauge. I do NOT want to live with a CAT! HELPPP MEEE!



Also, i have just started my own cool club, U.S.A. Papillons, if you're a papillon, and you HAVEN'T been invited, pleeaseee send me a message!

School???

Dear people and Dogs,
After finding Simon,(My beloved friend) , My mommy was jumping up and down for some reason. "MARIO!!! YOU HAVE BEEN EXCEPTED TO MKUD!!!" she kept saying. I had to figure this out on my own but it stands for "Mouse Kateers university for dogs" or its "Moderate Kind Unique Dogs University." Either way its a Dog school online and on ground. Their website isn't up yet but it looks like a prison on the outside. Its for rude Unruly Dogs who need some help. AM I RUDE? AM I UNRULY? no. I don't no why they are doing this to me. But its so uptight, you have to take a quiz an stuff, and send in your best pictures and all this stuff. ITS MADNESS MAN! You must have trim hair and not to unruly you no, its like a bad dream waiting to happen. My mommy is making, me , ADVERTISE for something I hate. So i guess GO MUD i mean MKUD.

MISSING MOUSE

dear readers,
my favoritist toy, is missing. his name is Simon and he is a mouse. he is orange all over and his tummy is a dark yellow, please contact me if you find him. until then i have been playing with my other bestest friend Mouseford Ma'vinche. But we all call him mouseford. Mouseford is a blue mouse and is in 2 of my pictures that i have on my page. i dont have much time and i am not worrying about if i dont capizalize things or spell things wrong. i have to find Simon!!!
Ps:I might get to go to the park later on... the doggie park.....with all the nice lookin' ladies that are chiwawas and papillons and anything thats almost or is smaller than me.
> Love you guys(my fans which are both boys and girls not just guys),
:*) Mario (who likes to non offend people and apologize for it.)
>

I HAVE BEEN POSINED

Ok, ok this is how it started......................(Flash Back...........
i was sitting on the couch, when i saw one of my favoritist foods, pizza. So i went to dash up on the table and snatch the pizza, but i something cought the corner of my eye. It was in a big blue jar, and it was open. Mommy poured some into a bowl and closed it back up..... i jumped up on the table and began to lick and lick and lick. It was soooooo good and Tangy and uhhhh so good. Mommy got so mad at me and she sent me outside. She said a word that i new i would remember. Suger.
After mommy was asleep i had to have more. I snuck out of her bedroom...and into the kitchen. and this time i smelled it coming not from the cabinet but from the table! It was the suger crystals in a little baggie. It was a faint grey and it had blue on it. I tore it open and licked the crystals. It tasted gross but it smelled the same.i had this posin crystal stuff all over my body and on my nose. I was scared and lonely so i began to cry which led to whimpering which led to long howels. Mommy came down the stairs and patted my head and then felt all the suger. this time she wasnt so mad but she said:
Splenda.
After that i began to pee and poop uncontrollably.
SO WATCH OUT FOR THE POSIIN SPLENDA!! IT WILL RUIN YOUR LIFE

SUMMER IS BACK FOR SURE (I hope)

I ran up to my owner and got on her bed and pulled her hair, licked her, and nibbled sometimes. "NO Mario 5 more minutessszzzzzzzzzzzz" My owner whaled. Finally i got her up and she ran strait to the computer! Then i decided It was time for drastic measures. I took my ball, dropped it at her feet and started to walk out of the room---. She looked at the ball then i turned my head around and gave her the puppy dog eyes. She picked up the ball and threw it then i was sure it was summer time because they only play with you when you do the puppy dog eyes, and you can only do the puppy dog eyes in the summer. I love summer 'cause that means being spoiled.

I AM BACK AND FREE

I survived The Vet! an they didn't make me nudered! I AM STILL A MAN!!! They just took out some baby teeth and that was it. I couldn't feel anything, they knocked me out.....funny ....isn't it?

WHY DO U LIKE SQUIRRELS???

I am soooo mad at my owner! She named all the squirrels in our back yard and she talks to them!!! HOW CRAZY IS THAT? SHE THINKS THEY ARE CUTE AND CUDDLEY! I AM CUTE!!! Ok, here are the EvIl SqUiRrElS nAmEs

1. Baby-boo
2. Piggy-poo
3.Longshot

Can u belive thats all the squirrels we have in our back yard? Well i did, scare away the band of mexican squirrels for my owner! I don't have any thing against mexicans! I love mexicans! My girlfriend is half mexican! Its just, this person from mexico had all these squirrels and they let them free! And there was like 17 of them, and they would knock down our bird feeder and steel the seeds in it! That scared away the birds! I not only love mexicans, i love birds! They are very easy to chase. but anyway the point is it still gets kind of lonely.....


VET NEWS:
OH MY GOSH!!!! My Vet, she said that either i need to get nuderd(I HATE THAT OPTION) or get a girl dog!! I hope they get a girl dog! I never want to get nuderd!
I'm only 2 years old! My owner's dad has to decied, she LOVES animals, she is even a vegetarion! And so is her dad. i just REALLY hope that they dont nuder me like my friend Quincey or my cousin Beau! I also have to get some teeth pulled, find out how it went next week.

-Mario

Ninja-Chip-MONKS

Call me crazy i was sitting next to the window....when i heard "NICK-TAK-NUCHE-MUK" i looked out the window and in a little hole...Mini monks were in it....they were all eating chips! "Chipmonks outside?" my master called i barked and looked at them they looked at me and then thrust their small ninja swords up in the air and kicked the window, i whined and ran to my cage and wouldn't come out.
Sincerly,
Dog who is getting a catscan tomarrow.

WHAT A BUMMER

It happend yesterday.....i was sitting peacefully when I REALLY had to go to the bathroom...This did not bother me because i new it was sunny outside and the birds were chirping. My master looked at me, puzzled. "You sure you want to go out Mario?" All the sudden i heard a big noise "BOOM! BOOOOM!" I then ran to the window and looked out of it, i saw RAIN! THUNDER! LIGHTNING! I whined and ran upstairs, but i still had to go to the bathroom....sooooo......i went upstairs and pooped on the floor, but for me being so polite, I had to wipe my but on the wall an i got in SOOOOO much trouble.