AhhhRoooOoOOoOOOOOooOOoo!

(Page 8 of 16: Viewing Diary Entry 71 to 80)  
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Coffee's Letter to Santa #4

December 21st 2008 4:58 pm
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Dear Santa,

I was framed.

Love,
Coffee

 

Coffee's Letter to Santa #3

December 10th 2008 4:13 pm
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Dear Santa,

It seemed like a good idea at the time.

Love,
Coffee

 

Coffee's Letter to Santa #2

December 7th 2008 4:57 pm
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Dear Santa,

Define "naughty."

Love,
Coffee

 

Coffee's Letter to Santa #1

December 3rd 2008 1:54 pm
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Dear Santa,

It was like that already when I got here.

Love,
Coffee
Very Good Girl

 

A Better Way To Race

November 30th 2008 10:22 am
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11:07am
136th Avenue
Me in the backseat with my head hanging out the drivers side back
window.
We stop at the traffic light at Colorado Boulevard.
When a Jeep pulls up next to us.
There is a Husky. He also has his head hanging out the passenger
side window.
Our noses are only feet apart.
Our eyes meet.
The Husky barks his challenge and I ROooOooooooOooooO back.
The competition is engaged.
THE RACE IS ON!
The light turns green and
We're Off!
Faster Faster!
We are neck and neck!
Bark Bark Bark!
RoooOOOoooooooOOOoOooooo!
We start to pull ahead!
TAKE THAT HUSKY!
Oh no! We're slowing!
Then we stop at the light.
The handsome Husky is a worthy adversary.
But he must be beaten.
I am a greyhound. I will win.
The light turns green!
Faster Faster!
And we pull ahead!
Go Mom!
My tail is wagging thump thump thump in the back seat.
With one last bark, the Husky cries out his defeat and turns into
WalMart.
I am victorious!
I have won!
And I am ready for a nap.
This is the best way to race.

Love,
Coffee

 

Baffling Human Behavior Part XVII

November 23rd 2008 1:21 pm
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I found out this weekend that other people’s houses have bathrooms similar to the ones in my house. (I know! I was shocked too!) But if you are invited over to a friend’s house, and you decide to check on mom while she is in the bathroom and you open the door… she will screech at you, waddle across the floor and slam the door in your face.

Rude. That never happened at home. Her behavior is inexplicable.

Love,
Coffee
(What? Privacy? Never heard of it.)

 

Intelligence Testing (or lack thereof)

November 13th 2008 12:11 pm
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Today mom read an article about dog intelligence. It suggested that one way to test a dog’s intelligence is to put a towel over the dog’s head and see how long it takes the dog to get out. The faster the dog gets out, the smarter the dog. Or so the theory goes.

So.. mom comes over to me and throws a towel over me. And waits. I don’t move. Not a peep. Not a wiggle. I continue to lay asnooze on the floor. And mom waited and waited and waited. Then she gave up and took the towel off herself.

She isn’t sure if I am a dunce or a genius.

All I know is that someone’s intelligence got tested and it wasn’t mine. Har Har Har!

Love,
Coffee

 

Coffee the.. Beaver?

November 10th 2008 5:21 pm
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If you are going to arrange the blankets, pillows, assorted stuffies and mat in your crate, be sure not to pile it all up at the crate door.

You create a dam, and have to cry for mom to come dig you out.

And instead of seeing your distress at being stuck, she will run for her camera and take your picture.

Love,
Coffee

 

Lots of Adorabley Adorableness

October 27th 2008 9:46 am
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This morning I was sound asleep in my favorite upside down cockroaching position. I heard mom walking around, then she stop next to me. She say “Coffee, you are such a silly. You are my best girl and I love you very much.”

I wagged my tail. Thump thump thump on the floor. My eyes never even opened. Even in my dreams, I hear my mom’s voice and my name and it makes me happy.

I love retirement.

Love,
Coffee

 

Why Greyhounds Make Terrible Retrievers, Part II

October 21st 2008 7:59 am
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Today mom threw a ball. Usually when she does this, we stand there and stare at each other to see who will actually end up going get the thing, but this time I TOOK OFF! I ran after the ball at full speed!

Only problem: I was so fast that I passed the ball and got to the fence before it did. I turned around to see where the slow ball went and it hit me on the head.

Not. Cool.

I know you retrievers out there like this whole “fetch” business, but I just don’t get it.

Love,
Coffee

 
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