2 Years 4 Months

You've been gone for 2 years and 4 months. I still miss you so much.

2 Years Ago Today

Ruby

Its been 2 years with out you. I think about the good times we had almost daily. All the trips to my moms we took. You loved going on any road trips. I was always afraid the cows were going to hurt you, when you were chasing and barking at them.
You knew at my moms you would get to eat bacon and ham and lots of stuff you didn't get at my house.
I try not to be sad about you not being here. I am so grateful to have you the time I did have you. You made my life better. I was with you longer than any BOYFRIEND I've ever had. I never got tired of your company. If you did do something bad, I couldn't stay mad at you .
I am going to be getting another pup soon. I have started looking, but i'm not in a hurry. I don't know how not to compare them to you. But that could be because I have a hard time making decisions. I think when I find the one , you will help me. I know it will be a rescue.
I just wish you were still here.
I MISS YOU SO MUCH

18 Months

Ruby

Just wanted to say I still miss you and think of you every day.

I wrote a poem for you

They say it helps to write a poem. I have never written a poem before. I am not sure if I'm finished with this or not. But 17 months ago today you left me. So here is the poem.


Ruby
You’ve now been gone for a year
Why do I still cry?
Dying, I no longer Fear
Some days I want to die.

Did you know how much I loved you ?
I thought by now I wouldn’t feel such Pain.
I don’t know what to do.
The tears still come like Rain.

Memories is all I have of you.
I can see you running so fast.
I think of things and I’m not so Blue
You always had a blast.

Ruby I need to know
Am I holding you back
I feel you need to go.
Run with the Pack

A couple nights ago
I thought you were there
I woke up and felt where you always slept
Of course the spot was bare
I laid back down and wept

15 months and I still miss you.

Ruby
I still miss you every day. Sometimes I can talk about you. But only if its a funny memory. Never about your illness. I still cry for you as I am now as I write this. I found this poem and it made me think of you.

DOGS WHO'VE SHARED OUR LIVES
Author Unknown

"They will not go quietly,
the dogs who've shared our lives.
In subtle ways they let us know
their spirit still survives.

Old habits still make us think
we hear a barking at the door.
Or step back when we drop
a tasty morsel on the floor.

Our feet still go around the place
the food dish used to be,
And, sometimes, coming home at night,
we miss them terribly.

And although time may bring new friends
and a new food dish to fill,
That one place in our hearts belongs to them...
and always will."

I have 2 fosters now

Ruby

Ingram was adopted at the last adoption day. A couple days later I got Nellie. She is a Staff. Terrier. Its the first time I fostered one that wasn't a boxer. Then yesterday I picked Winter up. I'm dog sitting her for the holidays. I also picked up another foster yesterday. Her name is Lyla. So I'm Loaded down with dogs right now. Lyla is so tiny. She came from the same place Nellie came from. A guy in San Antonio was hoarding a bunch of boxers . We were able to get 15 of them. But he still has at least 25 he wouldn't let us have. Any way I love you and miss you.

Just Wishing Youb Were Here

Ruby
Its Wednesday morning. The day before Thanksgiving. You left me last year the day before thanksgiving. Even though it was Nov. 20th last year. So it feels like I am going to have 2 days of you passing. November 20 and the day before Thanksgiving. I wonder how long it will be , before November 20 is the day before Thanksgiving again.
I know Thanksgiving will never be the same again.

I've got to go . We are going to Longview to have Thanks giving with my mom and my sister. I still have to pack.
I love and miss you still. Maybe if I had not lost my sister the year before you passed it would be easier. She was my best friend too. You helped me so much that last year. I will be so happy when we get to be together again.

1 Year

Ruby

You have been gone for 1 year now. There hasn't been 1 day I haven't thought of you or mentioned your name in a conversation. I know you are with Ollie. Ollie didn't know any one at the bridge until you . I bet he was so happy to see you. We all miss him so much too. Tristin , Ashlyn and I still talk about both of you all the time.

I have another foster now . I only had Nokia for about a month. I changed her name right away to Kia. She had been so badly abused, I didn't think no needed to be the first part of her name. Now I have Ingram . When the rescue got him he had a rope imbedded in his neck and they had to surgically remove it. He has stitches all around his neck. Then he has to go through heart worm treatment. He also has a bad case of kennel cough. I really can't understand how any one could have done this. He is a gentle giant. He has a natural tail and is probably the biggest boxer i've ever seen, or he will be when he gains weight. He lets Walter push him around. I think about the life some of these dogs have had, and I am so thankful you never had to go through any of the abuse they endure. These dogs are what keep me going with out you.
I remember the way you would pounce your feet and bark so loud when we told you to speak. You would have the proudest look on your face. I remember when you and I were coming back from my moms, I had given you a treat shaped like a cigar. You would always sit like a person looking straight ahead. You had this chew hanging out of your mouth and it looked like you were smoking a cigar. We were getting some of the funniest looks from people.
I still miss you so much. A year hasn't eased the pain. I still cry for you almost daily. But sometimes it will be thinking of a good time we shared and I will cry. I want to get another boxer. I've had so many fosters this year and they were great dogs. But they didn't compare to you. Or maybe if I get another dog I will have to let you go. I'm still not ready. I love you
Mom

11 MONTHS

Ruby
You have been gone for 11 months now. I still think of you every day. Ashlyn and I were talking this weekend about some of the fun times we had. I don't want to for get any of them. We had so many good times. You new the time of day you were suppose to go on your walk. If I didn't take you , you would get so mad and bring me your leash. Then you would start barking and put your leash in my lap. I'm still missing you so much. I still haven't gotten another dog. Winter finally was adopted. I only have one foster now, her name is Nokia. She has been so badly abused I don't know if I can bring her out of it. I see these dogs and its so sad. You never had to spend a night outside or anything these dogs have endured. You were loved your whole life. I know I will adopt one. I know when the right one comes along you will give me a sign to keep that special one. Until then I am going to keep fostering. I am fostering 2 at a time. I have been thinking about fosting other kinds of dogs. Like the mutts. They really need me more I think. Maybe later I will do that. I still miss you so much. Since you have been gone there is such a void in my life. Its like i'm just existing. waiting for us to be together again.

I only wanted you

They say memories are golden
well maybe that is true.
I never wanted memories,
I only wanted you.

A million times I needed you,
a million times I cried.
If love alone could have saved you
you never would have died.

In life I loved you dearly,
In death I love you still.
In my heart you hold a place
no one could ever fill.

If tears could build a stairway
and heartache make a lane,
I'd walk the path to heaven
and bring you back again.

Our family chain is broken,
and nothing seems the same.
But as God calls us one by one,
the chain will link again.

– Author unknown