Dogster

return to top

Woody's Musins'

OW!

Of all the...my tooth broke in half! And it wasn't just any old tooth, it was my right fang. Now it's jagged and Heidi says she wants to put a cap on it...I don't see how a hat would help a broken tooth, but humans also mark their territory in a tiny, closed room, so who knows what they're thinking half the time.

The wake-up regimen

The cat and I have devised a surefire way to wake Heidi up in the morning. The cat starts whining in her ear. This gets her at least half awake. Then, he pounces on her foot and tries to bite it. Heidi becomes not only fully awake, but also slightly homicidal. That's where I take things over.

I jump on the bed, jump around the bed, locate our victims face, and proceed to lick it. She utters something like "RRRMMMFFF" and attempts to hide her face--but a seasoned wake-up veteran like myself knows how to get around such a deflection: I paw at the hand blocking the face, and go in for the kill again. Heidi mumbles an obscenity I won't repeat here, and she's off to feed us both. SUCCESS. WE OWN HER.

The wake-up regimen

The cat and I have devised a surefire way to wake Heidi up in the morning. The cat starts whining in her ear. This gets her at least half awake. Then, he pounces on her foot and tries to bite it. Heidi becomes not only fully awake, but also slightly homicidal. That's where I take things over.

I jump on the bed, jump around the bed, locate our victims face, and proceed to lick it. She utters something like "RRRMMMFFF" and attempts to hide her face--but a seasoned wake-up veteran like myself knows how to get around such a deflection: I paw at the hand blocking the face, and go in for the kill again. Heidi mumbles an obscenity I won't repeat here, and she's off to feed us both. SUCCESS. WE OWN HER.