I don't like you

Did I mention that we have a pet turtle at home?

The human call it the fly river turtle or the river fly turtle or whatever it is. How can a turtle fly anyway? But if by some miracle it can really fly back to some river it belongs to I will be more than happy to help it on its way. Hmmph.

Personally I think that my breed sounds so much cooler. Miniature Pinscher, King of the Toy Dogs. Ain't that such a purty title? I certainly think so.

Definitely cooler than some stalwart turtle who keeps trying to take my humans' attentions from me, at the very least. Do you know that at least once a week, the slimy reptile would make them clean his tank? Then they would adoringly carry him outside to the open where he can roam about freely while I, I am locked in the house and not allowed to go out at all! How unfair is that?!!

...

Ok, granted that I tried to bite him one or two or ten times but he was in my territory! I am a great, noble, handsome King, I must defend my lands from ugly creatures like them, shouldn't I? I don't understand what the big fuss is about actually, I didn't even really bite him or anything, just trying to scare him but the galling thing is that I don't think I even managed to intimidate him!

This is humiliating. And now here I am, stewing in my basket as my humans blatantly ignore me (this is too much, I tell you) and go about seeing to that blasted reptile's every need!

Grr.

I don't like you, fly river turtle or river fly turtle or whatever your mama calls you.

I don't like you at all.

You better watch out coz one day I am going to sell you to a Chinese restaurant where they are going to make turtle soup out of you, hah! See how you will try to invade my family then!

Until then, I will bide my time and wait and plot and beg for treats and eat the treats and yum...

Aherm.

Anyway, I will wait! Just you see, I will prevail!! Hah!

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