Life as a princess

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Sept.5 2013... 14 weeks ago ~~

September 6th 2013 2:23 pm
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Dearest Buttercup,
I am so lonely for you .. i miss you so much ! I still wake up at 2 and at 4 .. those were our times ...i miss our walks in the stroller at night .. i miss seeing the kids at the kamp everyday .. i miss buying you things , i miss taking your picture ... honestly ... I JUST PLAIN MISS YOU ! .. your beds are still in their places and i still look for you .. i am glad you are not suffering with those nasty belly aches .. and i couldn't stand you not eating , and losing so much weight .. sending you over the bridge was my last gift i could give you .. but my heart still aches! Until we meet again dearest .. i love you to pieces !

Love& Kisses to my Angel Girl !,
Always Mom !


8/29/2013 ......13 weeks ago today ~~~~

August 29th 2013 4:17 pm
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Dearest Buttercup,
Time is going way to fast these days.. I miss you more than ever ! I finally captured on film the white butterfly on your forget me knots..... I know it is your spirit ! I had it printed on canvas and have it framed . I pray for you every night and wish I could hold you and get those great kisses and nosies!
I know we can't live forever.. but our time together was way to short .
No matter how busy the day is life just isn't complete without you ! My whole life and daily schedule revolved around you and no matter how I try to fill the time it just isn't the same !



12 weeks ago ~~~

August 22nd 2013 4:31 am
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Dearest Buttercup,
I can't believe how fast the time is going without you ! I don't know if my heart will ever heal.. your fur cousin Lilly has been keeping me in training.. LOL ! I have been staying with your brother a lot helping them with their health issues and taking care of Lilly. She is a champ at demanding what she wants .. and it is a chore at times trying to figure out what her bark means.. she gets me up once during the night for a potty break .. but that is no problem. She is not a good girl like you when it comes to taking her meds !

I went to see my friend last evening to hear the recorded message she had from the medium that she saw and spoke about you . OH MY GOSH ! it is totally amazing and i now have it recorded on my computer ! I do know you are safe , and are sending me signals daily ... i pray every night to keep you safe angel baby .. our time together was way to short !

I miss you incredibly .. and love you forever !

Kissey, Kisses,


11 weeks ago today ~~

August 15th 2013 4:36 am
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Good Morning sweet angel,

The weeks just keep moving so quickly without you ... Your brother Paul and Aunty Carla have been needing my help this past week .. i run home to get clothes and to kiss your box and your brothers boxes. Every night i say a prayer to keep you safe and to let me know that you are ok. ..and the dear Lord hasn't failed yet.

My friend Kate does a physic phone call to have her future read about once a year or when every she is feeling out of sorts... i am not sure about all of this but Kate did a phone reading with this lady from Philadelphia.. and the lady was telling her things all of it right . Kate lost a friend sometime ago and all of a sudden the lady was talking about Kates friend... and everything she was saying was true... all of sudden she says .. wait .. there is something coming through the vail... it is a white dog .. a very pampered white dog that recently passed a way ... she said .. you just saw the person that owned this dog not long away .. which was true as we were together about 2 weeks ago .. she said the dog wants you to let her know that she is ok , that she knows how much she was loved, that she loved her so much , and she so appreciated her wonderful life , and she said .. wait their is one more thing .. the dog says don't wait to long to get another dog.

Well as you can imagine i am sobbing ... and i said REALLY KATE .... she said i have it all recorded .. so as soon as i can get to Kates house i will hear it for my own ears !

There is no way any one on a phone from Philadelphia could know any thing about you and me right ?? what ever.. i am forever grateful and will continue to pray for you dear sweet Buttercup and i thank the dear Lord every day !

I love you Buttercup,

p.s. Your fur cousin Lilly has been my bed buddy .. she is so different from you but such a cutie! She sure won't give you a kiss for nothing .. no one gets a kiss.. she just wants to curl up next to you .. and when she wants something she will give you an demanding bark .. until you figure out what it is she wants . LOL ! Your brother says i have passed Lilly 101 ! LOL !


10 Weeks since you passed

August 10th 2013 4:16 am
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Dearest Buttercup,
It has been 10 weeks since you left us for the rainbow bridge. I feel like you are just on vacation and that you will be back soon. It must be because of the white butterflies that still visit me daily. No matter where I go there seems to be your incredible spirit with me . Your brother Paul and Aunty Carla are really having a rough time right now so I have been staying with them and taking care of your fur cousin Lilly. She is such a sweetie ..but in a very different way from you. She isn't a kisser or cuddler..but put a blanket at your feet and she just wants to lay on top of your feet. If you have to get up she will give you a WOOF to sit back down. She like you has a lot of meds to be taken through out the day , but NOT like you she is so darn picky about what she eats so it can be a huge challenge to get her to take her meds. So far I have been very successful. Brother Paul say i am in Lilly training and have passed . My official diploma will be coming in the mail LOL! The funny thing is she now gives them the big snub she is mad at them and keeps her eyes on me at all times. Maybe in some strange way she is helping my soul to heal without you . She like you gets me up in the middle of the night ..we go for potty, a wee snack and back to bed. There will never be another girl like you sweet angel. I miss you so much and love you forever!

Kissey kisses,
Love you ,
P.S. to my dogster pals ..if you don't see me posting for Buttercup it is because I am staying with my son and his wife for now. My daughter in law starts treatment next week for cancer and the stress has had a huge effect on both of them,complicated with broken sleep every night taking care of their aging dog Lilly. Please keep them in your prayers . I will post when I can. I only have my iPad with me and sometimes it is very difficult to post or type. Angel Buttercup and I will be back !


8/1/2013 9 weeks ago today ~~~~

August 1st 2013 4:20 pm
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Dearest Buttercup ,
Today is 9 weeks you left us for the rainbow bridge. I still have my white butterfly in the yard .. i have to tell you that Daddy and i went to Conn. this week-end for a family reunion. I was truly afraid to leave , because i didn't want to come home and find no butterflies in the yard. We arrived at cousin Sue's house on Sat. Her place is beautiful. After about 5 minutes in her yard .. there was my white butterfly .. than there were two .. i said * Sue do you have white butterflies .. she said no why .. i normally have yellow ones..* so i told her about the white butterflies ... Cousin Sue lost her Savannah ( yellow lab) not long ago we watched the two butterflies frolic and play all day we decided it was you and Savannah for sure ! On Sunday we went to play golf and sure enough there was my white butterfly .. we went to visit cousin Sue's business * Villarinas* and sure enough when i got out of the car there was a white butterfly .. i know for sure your spirit is with me everywhere.. but it does not help the loss i feel. Sometimes it makes me smile and other times it makes me cry . When we got home .. i went right to the back yard to water the flowers .. and no butterfly .. Cousin Sue kept saying .. Buttercup wants you to move here ! LOL ! .. well after a while sure enough there you were ..* the white butterfly *
We had a love affair that only the two of us will ever understand .I pray every night Buttercup for you .. and i kiss your sweet memorial box daily .. boy do i miss those kisses !

Until we meet again sweet Angel.
I Love you beyond words ,


July 25, 2013 2 months ago today ~~~~

July 25th 2013 2:02 pm
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Dearest Buttercup ,
Two months ago today you left for the rainbow bridge . Gosh the days get harder without you. We had a very special love affair and honestly i am not sure if my heart will ever heal . I know you are sending me signs that you are ok .. I pray every night and ask god for a sign from you . The white butterflies that are in the yard , that are following me no matter where i go ,i know must be your spirit. I did a little research about white butterflies and this is what i found out. They symbolize the soul of the departed loved ones, and life after death. They also represent a guardian angel ushering you along lifes path, and they also symbolize good luck. They are the most common form of communication after death. They also are a symbol of the resurrection. Last night i once again prayed for a sign .. i just wanted to see you in my dreams.. as i was about to doze off.. i swore i heard you doing your mona routine to get up on the bed.. i said "Patty you are imagining things ". so i turn the volume down on the T.V. i know i heard you 4 more times. I know you are with me .. but i sure miss holding you and just plan taking care of you ! I get angry that i couldn't do more for you Buttercup .. please know i did all i could do babygirl, my last gift was not to let you suffer ... I love you !

Fly free sweet angel,
I love you and miss you more than you will ever know !.


July 22, 2013 A poem from my pals Vern , Chloe & Cokenee

July 22nd 2013 2:21 pm
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Aunty Colette put together a wonderful slide show of my photos for mom and at the end was this wonderful poem ! We want to share it with everyone.. get out your tissues !

I'm still here

Please don't mourn for me
I'm still here, though you don't see.
I'm right by your side each night and day
and within your heart I long to stay.

My body is gone but I'm always near.
I'm everything you feel, see or hear.
My spirit is free, but I'll never depart
as long as you keep me alive in your heart.

I'll never wander out of your sight-
I'm the brightest star on a summer night.
I'll never be beyond your reach-
I'm the warm moist sand when you're at the beach.

I'm the colorful leaves when fall comes around
and the pure white snow that blankets the ground.
I'm the beautiful flowers of which you're so fond,
The clear cool water in a quiet pond.

I'm the first bright blossom you'll see in the spring,
The first warm raindrop that April will bring.
I'm the first ray of light when the sun starts to shine,
and you'll see that the face in the moon is mine.

When you start thinking there's no one to love you,
you can talk to me through the Lord above you.
I'll whisper my answer through the leaves on the trees,
and you'll feel my presence in the soft summer breeze.

I'm the hot salty tears that flow when you weep
and the beautiful dreams that come while you sleep.
I'm the smile you see on every face.
Just look for me, I'm everyplace!

See i'm still here.. i am everywhere you look .. but it still isn't the same ..

I miss you everyday more and more Buttercup

Love to you my dearest Angel Girl ,


Thursday July 18 ...7 weeks ago ~~~

July 19th 2013 4:33 am
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Dear Buttercup,

Seven weeks ago you left us for the rainbow bridge... I miss you terribly .. i wish i could have you back with us.. i ask myself over and over, did i do everything i could do for you .. i kiss your box everyday .. and look for you everywhere. The white butterflies that are frolicking in the yard let me know that you are ok. Even on my bike ride the other day there was one right beside me .. i see them in your garden , they land on the front door .. it must be my sign that you are ok .. just to have one of your sweet kisses , I miss holding you , smelling you , taking you for a walk , bathing you , taking your picture, talking to you .. it is unbearable without you somedays ! Until we meet again my babygirl ! I LOVE YOU MORE THAN WORDS COULD EVER SAY !

Love and Miss you ,


6 weeks ago today ~~~

July 11th 2013 5:00 pm
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Dear Buttercup,
I can not believe it is 6 weeks ago today that you left us for the bridge..I wish you could have hung on .. Momma Colette and Momma Karen came for a visit with Vern , Cokenee and Chloe ! They would have just loved you to pieces ! Vern , Chloe & Cokenee enjoyed all your beds and your toys. They sniffed the yard looking for you .. Cokenee and Vern were waiting at the door to be let in and Momma Colette took their picture. When she uploaded the photo their was your ora right next to Vern .. Oh it just made me cry .. i could see you perfect ! I think Momma C. and Momma K brought great spirits with them and your spirit will live on forever with us ! Then yesterday in the afternoon i got a package from Aunty Sally , The Boyzz and Uncle Alan ... OH MY .. it is a perfect stuffed Maltese that looks just like you .. now here is the amazing thing .. we never have butterflies in our yard .. but since you passed on their are white butterflies everyday . The other day i went for a walk and one was following me .. i just know it is your spirit !! well, the maltese stuffed dog that Aunty Sally sent me has on the most adorable outfit with a beautiful butterfly on it ! You know butterflies are a sign of rebirth ...Thank you Aunty Sally and The Boyzz so much !! see you are everywhere with me .. Oh Dear Buttercup i miss you beyond words!! I would give anything to have you back ! The company all left today and the house once again is so quiet . I miss you Babygirl , I miss my kisses, my nozies and most of all your wonderful smell !

I love you Buttercup,
Mommy !

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