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Like a zebra

June 8th 2016 5:10 am
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Fomfomfom sprayed me with Apple cider vinegar again. I smell like feet.

And they're so desperate they are going to feed me vitamin E and evening primrose oil. Yesterday they put expired evening primrose oil on my skin. Today they're going to eat the expired primrose themselves and bought me new ones. Alas the capsules are bovine and they're hesitant. Maybe tomorrow they'll buy me vegetarian capsules. They're very fanciful that way.

During my evening walk they delved into all the words describing animals. My favourite is zebrine.

 

Plastic bowl dermatitis

June 7th 2016 6:38 am
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So the cat woman said the inside of my upper lip has thickened and she said I've lost a lot of colour on my nose and lips since the last time she saw me. Fomfomfom came home and started googling like crazy and this thing called the plastic bowl dermatitis turned up. So apparently some dog noses turn pink from the use of plastic bowls. They don't know if it's true but they are not taking chances. So I found myself drinking water out of their ceramic soup bowl. My blue plastic bowl which has been with me since forever is now hidden somewhere.

Sigh.

In happier news, I don't have diarrhoea anymore.

 

Cat vet woman

June 6th 2016 4:01 am
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Last night we went down at 2am. Today I had to go twice in the afternoon 10 minutes apart and then I found myself at the vet's. They made an appointment with the cat vet woman, how embarrassing. I warned them not to tell anyone I saw a cat specialist. My friends would laugh at me.

But the cat get woman was nice. She sucked poop out from my behind and talked rubbish to me when she tried to look inside my ears so I won't bite her. Then she looked inside my upper lip and thought it's thickened so she took a picture and wanted to send it to the skin guy. Then she found I had a lot of bacteria in my poop and I'm on antibiotics again.

She said no lamb and very little kibble, if at all. Back to frog.

 

Back to kibble

June 5th 2016 6:55 am
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I had another tummyache almost midnight last night and so we quickly went down. They think it's the fatty lamb I've been having that's giving me the runs. So it's been decided that I will eat lamb kibble for dinner and supper from now on. I am not complaining. It's been so long since I've had kibble; it tastes so good.

They said I shouldn't eat too much of it anyway so Ah bee gave me 70 for dinner. That was hardly enough so I asked Fomfomfom for some more. She then gave me another 136. When Ah ma and Ah bee heard what she's done, they gave it to her real good. She was so contrite she just kept quiet and let them abuse her.

Yums.

 

Actually

June 4th 2016 4:27 am
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Today I had a stomachache in the afternoon so I told ah bee. Ah ma told her to bring me down in a hurry coz they know I don't kid around. Then I had diarrhoea and we played for 40 minutes. When I came home, ah ma praised me for being clever for telling them.

When I was downstairs, a man asked ah bee how old her puppy is. Ah bee said 13 and the strange man said, 13 years old actually? I don't know how to be 13 years old unactually; I guess he means I look young. Okie. I'll take it.

A newborn panda baby is only as big as its mama's mouth, we saw in the papers today. Would that human babies be that small, ah bee said enviously.

I don't know what that means actually and unactually.

 

It's only money

June 3rd 2016 9:05 am
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Just now after my dinner I was still hungry so I barked at them. Cha and Ah ma just ignored me. So I kept barking and then Ah ma told me I can't have more food because we don't have money anymore.

I panicked for a moment and then I remembered my shoebox so I told ah ma she can have the money in my shoebox.

Coz I love Ah ma.

 

Drama mama

June 2nd 2016 8:05 am
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Ah bee kicked a concrete block today accidentally and scratched the top of her foot. The skin was broken and she had to clean it with alcohol and she said she was going to write the word "Ren" (maybe in blood) on a piece of cloth and tie it around her forehead and bite down hard on a towel as she bears with the pain. I wanted to snigger at her drama.

Until cha said it sounded exactly like something I would do.

 

Delicious

June 1st 2016 10:26 am
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It's been a week since I started on the lamb. I'm really loving it. It's either lamb rump or shabu and sometimes they fry it up for me. It smells so good everyone says so and they all want a piece.

But it's all mine.

 

Quid pro quo

May 31st 2016 5:10 am
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Ah ma finally bathed me today. It's the first time in, oh I don't know, two months, probably. In return, she wants my Dogu. To sweeten the deal, she washed all my toys.

It's a practical world.

 

So deep

May 30th 2016 9:15 am
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"What day is it?" asked Pooh.

"It's today," replied Piglet.

"My favourite day," said Pooh.

 
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