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Fat pets give me a bad name

March 23rd 2010 7:08 am
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Fomfomfom was so sick she couldn't even bring me for my evening walk. So cha brought me while fomfomfom watched animal planet on cable tv. The show was called "downsizing your pet". I hope it didn't give her any ideas.

Maybe she was too sick to process any information.


One man's treasure is another man's mango

March 22nd 2010 7:52 am
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Evelyn gave ah bee a mango today and someone told ah bee it's the very rare white flower mango, almost extinct. Ah bee told evelyn, who has a sack of such mangoes at home, and evelyn declared, whaddya know? It's almost like having a panda in the fridge.

Well, I think it looks like the mangoes on sale at the market place. I'll buy me a sack tomorrow too.


Sunday morning surprise

March 21st 2010 9:10 am
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Three of the little bandits showed up outside our door again this morning. The only difference this time is that Ah ma was home and she had to pop her head out to see what the ruckus was all about. Who would she see but the three bandits. Amanda was so shocked to see Ah ma she could only manage a weak hello after a while. I think Eliza hid behind their Aunty. You don't know my Ah ma; she can be scary if she wants to.

But this time Ah ma decided not to scare them and they continued making a lot of noise and it woke Ah Bee. What a way to wake up on a Sunday morning, she says. I think she means it's a wonderful way to wake up on any given morning.

Not me. I thought I would be safe from them crazy kids when I'm at home. Now, like what Cha says, my haven is compromised.

This cannot do.


The one about my poo poo

March 20th 2010 10:01 am
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We went to the vet bright and early this morning coz I was due for my annual vaccination. Plus my anal sacs needed to be emptied. I’m about 2 weeks overdue on that; Ah bee got out of doing it since she insists that the vet can do it anyway.

She’s right but that also means my anal sacs were very full. So when the vet woman squeezed them (this is another vet woman, not the one I usually see), I kinda sprayed the wall, floor and table top with that black substance. But the vet woman is cool; she calmly cleaned my backside first, then attended to the stained wall and floor. And she jokingly asked Ah bee if she’s got anything on her face. I like her.

And you know what the best part is? She didn’t even charge us for emptying my anal sacs. I like her!

I'm not sure if I got a tummyache from the deworming pill I had to eat at the vet's but I had the runs in the evening when I went down for my walk. Later at night I had to go again so I ran into the toilet, and then another toilet, before deciding I'd better go at the balcony. Ah ma praised me for being clever and gave me plenty of belly rubs for my poor tummy.



Child abuse

March 19th 2010 9:45 am
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Today karen wanted to go pee pee but her maid refused to bring her to the toilet coz she was busy talking on her cellphone and karen was wearing diapers. So karen went alone and was away for 10 minutes before public pressure forced the disgusting maid to go check on her. They emerged with karen crying and the maid holding her pants in her hands. We don't know what happened to karen when she was alone in the toilet.

The mercedes buddhist uncle who saw everything was livid. And fomfomfom was so guilty she didn't go into the toilet after karen coz she had to look after me. We were very disturbed all night over the episode, but conceded nothing can be done.

The parents ought to be shot.


The beginning of the end

March 18th 2010 7:30 am
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Oh no, ah ma's finally gone and done it! Now ah ma's got unrestricted access to the casino for a year!

And she and fomfomfom are going a-gambling again tomorrow. I've thought of a way to make the money last. Fomfomfom will go to the roulette table and buy black and red simultaneously. With luck she can play for an entire day.

I'm so smart.


When I grow up...

March 17th 2010 9:19 am
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Eliza wants to drive a bus coz it can carry a lot of people. Amanda says she wants to drive a big car. Nicky doesn't mind driving an aeroplane.

Me, I don't do drive. I only do driven around.

Kids. Stupido.


School holidays special

March 16th 2010 9:34 am
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Of course ah ma lost most of what she'd won yesterday.

I was so caught up in documenting ah ma's casino shenanigans that I forgot to mention, my car arrived yesterday! Sheldon is his name, and he's a spankin' new red mini cooper. I was the first passenger and fomfomfom drove me around the estate. I didn't really like it coz it smells funny and I don't know how to drive it. I prefer my remote controlled cooper.

But it's mine and all the kids must ask my permission before they can sit in it. Eliza and Mashita took rides today and left shoeprints on the back of the front seats. Amanda has arranged for a ride tomorrow at 9am.

I'll start charging money next week.


Casino Wind-Cloud

March 15th 2010 7:03 am
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How many times can red turn up on the roulette table consecutively? I dunno, but I certainly can write more consecutive entries on ah ma and her casino shenanigans.

Anyway, ah ma made some money at the roulette table for once today. But since she's going again tomorrow, we can kiss the money goodbye.

Goodbye, money. It was nice knowing you.


I know this is my 4th straight entry on Ah ma

March 14th 2010 8:45 am
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but I really need to write this down - the woman is off to the casino tomorrow again! And we know for sure she's going again next week with another bunch of people. That makes three straight weeks. And she says we shouldn't buy her the year pass. But only because she wants to see if she likes the other casino better.

I think I need to hide my shoebox.

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