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Ka chng ai ga lao lou lai

October 14th 2007 10:33 am
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My Ah ma’s brother came today and he said something in hokkien which, loosely translated, means “backside going to drop down”. *giggles* I think he was referring to me wagging my tail happily on seeing him. Still, I thought he should have put it in a more refined manner. Even though he was saying it as it was. But still. You know what I mean. *giggles*

I thought I’ve seen the end of Sunday night Korean dramedies since the new one is one serious drama. It seems like we’re seeing a delayed reaction of the Korean fever in this house. Fomfomfom and Ah bee were glued to the tv all night and they even cooked themselves Korean minced meat noodles to stuff themselves with while watching the show. Those are 700 calories a packet if you must know. Cha pointed to Ah bee’s tummy and said, “So round!” I hope she’s embarrassed. And that Cha, she ate one potato, one egg and drank milo. Bingeing like that and ignoring me is unacceptable behaviour. And that Fomfomfom had the check to ask me to call her Oma. Ggo ra ji ha go neun.

 

Kiss kiss Fomfomfom

October 13th 2007 10:09 am
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I am afraid I will have to give Melmel up to Diva. She’s got him good. Really I stand no chance against her. Melmel was kissing her in the gardens today. I saw him. And he was so gentle and he kissed her for such a long time. It was so sweet; you have to be there to see it for yourself. That was when I decided to give up Melmel as one of my boyfriends. He’s spoken for. But the cute and shy Chipchip, he’s still mine.

I had to face Fomfomfom the whole day. Sometimes, there are downsides to having big beautiful eyes like mine- I see too much. And today I saw too much of Fomfomfom. But I still love her all the same. She didn’t go to the Sammi Cheng concert so she could stay in to watch me. I heart Fomfomfom deep deep deep deep deep.

 

I overspent today

October 12th 2007 11:07 am
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I am very happy today coz I got to walk for an hour at the gardens. We didn’t meet many friends but still it was a most enjoyable walk. It had rained in the afternoon and the weather was just perfect. I didn’t even pant after. Fomfomfom let me walk everywhere and I could linger at the plants for as long as I wanted. Oh a duck did attempt to attack me but Ah bee was quick to scoop me up. Fomfomfom said she would find someone to assassinate that stupid duck and we will have it braised for dinner. Hmm, I think I will have to talk her outta it. I don’t want the police to catch her.

Oh oh! We saw a dead iguana in the gardens! Its white belly was facing up and it was so dead. Ah bee saw it and she said, “Argh!” Then she pointed it out to Fomfomfom and Fomfomfom went, “ARRRGHHHHHHH!” Silly gals, what’s a dead iguana. I was actually thinking of bringing it home to keep in a jar and I would give it as a present to my Sugar mummy. But I didn’t even get to go near it. Maybe tomorrow.

 

Puppy puppy

October 11th 2007 10:22 am
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The Japanese poodle, she scared me. She was chasing me and her oblivious owner let her. We ended up in a tangled mess and Ah bee got a rope burn on her shin from the retractable leash. And Fomfomfom is still gaga over her. So soft so soft, she kept saying. Grrr. I’ll have all of you know that I am so soft so soft too. Grumble grumble.

Ah bee taught me a lesson today. Cha had cooked a packet of Myojo beehoon and I smelt chicken. So I told Ah bee that I want the chicken from her packet if she cooks. Ah bee solemnly tells me that there is no chicken in there. Are you telling me not to trust my nose, I asked. She nodded and informed me that things aren’t always what they seem. Sometimes, bad bad people will deceive you on purpose- they’d make noodles smell like chicken when there isn’t chicken in there. Fomfomfom said that it’s too early for me to learn that but Ah bee said I’m almost 4. I understood all that Ah bee was trying to tell me. The next time, I will ask Fomfomfom to buy the expensive Taiwanese instant noodles. They have real meat in those.

 

Is no more

October 10th 2007 10:30 am
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Today is my birthday. I am three years and 10 months old. *giggles* Fomfomfom bought me a slice of walnut cake this time and it was delicious! Don’t tell Cha but Ah bee pinched the cake and gave it to me when she wasn’t looking. *giggles* Ah ma said no one celebrates monthly birthdays. No one likes celebrating birthdays that often. But that’s not true; it’s only the mouldie oldies who hate birthdays. Young things like me, we love birthdays.

In other news, the green sofa in the dining room is no more. I have no idea where it went but I know the strange men took it away. I loved the green sofa. I would sleep on it, puke on it, pee on it and use it as my little yellow handkerchief to clean my mouth. Green Sofa, you have served us well. I am not sure how the red sofa they carted down from Ah ma’s room will fare but I don’t really like it- it doesn’t quite have the depth you have. You will be missed.

 

Ah bee's PVFT

October 9th 2007 10:26 am
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Just now we were in Cha’s room and she was letting Ah bee play with futures. Simulated trading of course. So Fomfomfom asked Ah bee, “Long or short?” And Ah bee screamed, “Long!” She made fake US$50 in a coupa of minutes. Ah bee wants me to emphasize it’s banana money she made so don’t you all go asking her for treats. Then, Ah bee declared that she was going to short it. It was a painful 40 minutes after that. There is nothing worse than watching the market which doesn’t move, Ah bee said. Sort of like watching paint dry, Cha offered. So we watched the paint dry. For 40 minutes, I think them traders went off to lim teh. Then thank goodness it went down 7 bids and Ah bee decided to take her $35 banana money and run. That was the end of her Pseudo Virgin Futures Trade.

Fomfomfom asked Ah bee how she decided where the market was heading. She replied she would ask herself that question and a little voice in her head would say UP or DOWN and that is how she knows. Fomfomfom told her that when the little voice gets too loud, she should go see a shrink. *giggles* actually, there is no little voice in Ah bee’s head. It’s me pretending to be the little voice. I would tip-toe into the room when I hear the question and I’d whisper UP, DOWN or STAY. Then I would quickly sneak outta the room before she turns around and sees me there. I tell you, she would be clueless, helpless and bankrupt without me. She was happily telling Fomfomfom that the US market would suit her fine since she works late into the night anyway. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that it will never work out. Because it is way past the bedtime of the little voice in her head.

 

A cup of wine

October 8th 2007 11:10 am
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Recently, Ah bee would meet us at the gardens after her class. And I love seeing Ah bee at the gardens; it’s an altogether different feeling. I would race towards her when I see her. It’s like a surprise you know. I love surprises.

Whoever is holding me would drop the leash so that I can charge towards Ah bee. Today Fomfomfom dropped the leash and I flew in Ah bee’s direction. I overshot a little but I turned around and kissed her. Then Ah bee dropped the leash too and said, “Run to Fom!” So I ran. But I ran passed Fomfomfom, past Cha. Then they were all a little horrified coz I was running wild. Cha started chasing me and I darted around her. She couldn’t even lay hands on my leash. Then I ran towards Ah bee and she couldn’t catch me either. It went on for a while- we were just playing catch there. I was most nimble and agile. Those clumsy oafs didn’t even come close. Fomfomfom was laughing hysterically at this point in time coz she realized that I was just playing the fool with them. Cha had landed on her skinny backieside trying to catch me while Ah bee fell forwards and landed on her knees. *giggles* all these time, the useless Fomfomfom was just laughing her head off. At least she knew I was playing and that there wasn’t really any danger. I was just being playful. Cha got me eventually. It was real tiring playing this way. They said we can do this again but we got to choose a nice patch of grass and check that there are no big dogs around. Yay! I love playing catching.

So happy.

Fomfomfom came up with the first line of a couplet just now in the kitchen. She was inspired by the pot of water on the counter. She thought that Ah bee wouldn’t be able to complete it but boy was she wrong. Ah bee gave her, not one but three more lines. Fomfomfom was duly impressed.

But somehow I have a feeling she’s the only one.

 

Xiao Ping er er

October 7th 2007 10:32 am
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Today was a first for Ah ma- she defrosted the chicken in the microwave. Ah ma has never done this before you know. That’s coz my Ah ma, like all good housewives, is a very organized woman. She plans everything. So she has never met the situation where she would be staring at frozen meat in the face. But she didn’t count on me being so hungry today. Usually, I’d get meat for lunch and kibble for dinner. So there wasn’t any meat left at dinnertime. But I was so hungry that I sat at Fomfomfom’s feet while she ate instead of playing out at the garden. She took pity on me and went to ask Ah ma if there’s meat in the fridge. So Ah ma stopped watching the news and came down, only to find herself staring at frozen meat. But that didn’t unfaze my Ah ma- she put it in the microwave. And stood there waiting coz she was worried that the microwave might blow up. We all know that the microwave has a defrost function but that is beside the point. The point, let me reiterate, is Ah ma defrosting the chicken using the microwave for the first time. FOR ME. Kiss kiss Ah ma.

Cha asked me if I’ve got double eyelids. Pffft! What’s double, I told her I have triple eyelids. Double is for commoners. I also have the most beautiful eyelashes. And gorgeous eyes. It’s a pity though- all these years I have been trying to grow eyebrows but to no avail. My boyfriend at the corner of the street, he has lovely blond eyebrows that contrast so wonderfully with his black fur. I should get him to teach me how.

 

Every dog needs a home; every home needs a dog.

October 6th 2007 10:29 am
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Today we went to the condo to get Ah ma. So I took my walk there instead. It’s not a bad place but there aren’t many friends there, unlike at the gardens. We got back relatively early so I got to welcome passers-by at the garden too. So happy.

Later at night, Ah gong, Ah bee and I were out at the porch looking at the red red sky (which Ah bee still thinks is a sailor’s delight). Some clunker of a taxi pulled up outside the neighbour’s and was sputtering away. It totally disturbed the tranquility of the lovely autumn night. So I barked at it. It went away. Then it came back. So I barked at it again. It didn’t go away. So I barked and barked at it, until it went away. That showed him who’s boss around here.

Ah gong decided he wanted some wine so he told Ah bee to open a bottle for him. So Ah bee took out the corkscrew- Jan yiyi has a real crude name for this device but I shan’t repeat it here- and attempted to open it. She’s real lousy and the cork broke halfway. So Ah gong had to dump the entire bottle of wine. I hope she is ashamed, wasting good wine like that. At least the second bottle opened fine.

Oh there is this new shop near the gardens- Karma, Kettle and Rhapsody. I don’t see any kettles hanging in there and I don’t think they even know the meaning of rhapsody. So my powers of deduction tell me that this is a shop where they sell karma. It is about time someone start a shop like this. People, if you know that you are low on your accumulation, do visit the shop.

 

Scarred

October 5th 2007 11:42 am
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I am so used to cleaning my ears every night I can’t seem to rest easy until it is done. And I can’t get anything done- I can't eat, wouldn’t go into my room, and was distracted all night. And it was with an apprehensive heart I finally settled down.

Ping ping pa pa.

 
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