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Cha says I'm a bouncing ray of sunshine

June 16th 2009 8:12 am
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Last night fomfomfom spied on ah gong and hid behind a screen to eavesdrop on his conversation with his broker. It went something like this: "We have met with utter failure this time. Waterloo. Napoleon, you know? But that was his end. We will rise again."

Fomfomfom sniggered and reported it happily to ah bee first thing when ah bee came back. And the same message was reported merrily to cha this morning. My mamas huddled together and hi-fived and giggled.

I would love to call them unfillial but I kind of foresaw this particular loo too. Perhaps we should just, kindly, say ah gong is not very smart.


Poor fat moo

June 15th 2009 8:47 am
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Ah ma finally got down to patching up my fat moo. It was torn at the armpits and was losing its stuffing so I bugged ah ma for the longest time to get him fixed.

Later I found that ah ma had sewed fat moo's arms together. She explained that there was no other way to do it.

How unhappy I am.


Brown Nose

June 14th 2009 8:32 am
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This shih tzu was left at the guard house in a cage. Fomfomfom and ah bee were unhappy she was there coz her owner had gone out and the maid had the day off. She couldn't be left alone at home either coz she's a barker and neighbours will complain. So she was destined to sit in the hot weather until 9pm when the owner comes back.

My unhappy mamas went to the rental apartment to retrieve my harness and brought brown nose for a walk. We don't know her name, but her nose and eyes are real brown and we think she's a little albino. She's real feisty and had quarrelled with me often in the past. We started up again today, but she calmed down after she sniffed my backside and put me in her database. We walked side by side and it was fun.

I went home to rest after an hour and a half. Fomfomfom's walk with brown nose lasted three and a half hours coz she didn't want brown nose back in the cage early if she could help it.

Ok, she's actually quite cute. Like me.


Call off the search

June 13th 2009 9:50 am
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I finally saw Ah bee after she went missing in action for 50 hours. She promised she'd spend the weekend with me. I was happy.

I just didn't think that meant bundling me up and heading to the apartment where I napped while she played tennis with her friends. But I did get to meet my fans. I was excited to see HF whom I haven't seen in nearly 2 years. And I was introduced to Evelyn, who said I am The Ngeow Ngeow. What bollocks. I am The Queen. Now don't anybody forget that.

And I thought shewould be playing with me all night long but the useless thing was out like a light. She didn't even come to open the door for me when I barked. Ever since we moved back to the condo, I've not been able to open doors by myself. I used to be able to do it using my snout but the walls here are cut differently; there's always a corner in the way. And so just now when no one came to my rescue, I had to shimmy my way out. Turns out I was watched and everyone heard about how clever I was, shimmying my way out of a situation.

I thought you should too.


Ah bee who?

June 12th 2009 8:47 am
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I didn't see ah bee last night coz she came back only after I'd turned in. I didn't see her this morning coz she'd already left when I woke up. Now I'm going to sleep again and she's still not back.

I hope she's not out soliciting.


Don't want to sleep

June 11th 2009 8:58 am
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Yesterday they tucked me in bed at 1030. I rolled all over the place for an hour coz I wasn't sleepy at all. Tonight I'm smarter. It's 12 midnight already and I refuse to go to bed. It's all a matter of compensating for unfairness. No one rides roughshod over xiaoping, especially when it comes to matters of the bed.

Besides, ah bee ain't back yet. She must be busy advocating and soliciting. I'll wait for her.


66 whole months

June 10th 2009 7:45 am
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I am 5 and a half years old today! What a momentous occasion. But ah ma kept stealing my soft toy shiu shiu. It's unbecoming. She had washed shiu shiu and kept trying to put him under the sun. I had to do sleuthing on my birthday. I'd find shiu shiu and keep him beside my volleyball. I would be satisfied, but ah ma would cackle and then hide him again. One would think ah ma is 5 and a half years old.

How childish.

The celebration food consisted of a braised chicken heart, half a gizzard, a bit of liver and exactly one slice of chicken.

Now that's childish and stingy.

Ah bee came back and wanted to sleep, so they told me it's 1130 already, bedtime. But fomfomfom whispered in my ear it's only 1030. But since I was the youngest, I had to comply and I was hustled into my bed unceremoniously.

Childish and stingy and lazy liars. Boo.


There, there

June 9th 2009 8:50 am
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Ah bee told me this morning she dreamt I was bitten by a snake and then she woke up crying. I comforted her and said I wasn't bitten at all. When she was having the nightmare, I was sleeping and holding hands with fomfomfom. We were very happy all night.

Pat, pat.


What I have to endure

June 8th 2009 8:14 am
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Ah ma held a jasmine flower to my nose and I didn't like it at all. I sneezed and walked away. Ah ma didn't respect me and chased after me with that darn flower and I wasn't happy at all. Ah ma likes the smell and I don't, and Ah ma kept laughing at me.

Ah bee came back late and had dinner, so I sat by her feet and raised my head as high as I could and opened my eyes as wide as I could. I often get some food this way. But I was tired after ah ma's harrassment, so after a while, my eyes closed. But I firmly maintained my posture. Ah bee sniggered and I woke up, but I still couldn't keep my eyes open. So I sat there with my head high and eyes closed, since no food seemed to be forthcoming. Ah bee told ah ma to come see me fall asleep while asking for food and ah ma laughed out loud at me again.

It is very hurtful, all these people always laughing at me. But ah ma's good humour gave me some food and it wasn't all a loss after all.


Teenage mutant ninja mushrooms

June 7th 2009 8:31 am
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Yesterday, we found mutated enoki mushrooms at the rental apartment. It had been left in the fridge so long it turned into a monster. The bottom half had wilted and the top half perhaps fed on the rotting bottom and grew big and bloated. Fomfomfom opened the fridge door and out it sprang. They struggled, yes, there was combat. After a nail-biting sequence, fomfomfom won and pushed the mutant mushrooms into the rubbish chute.

Who'd have thunk how dangerous 70 cents can be these days.

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