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Only 4 years old!

November 29th 2008 9:16 am
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I didn't want to eat kibble this morning coz I had no appetite. I only wanted my biscuit. But cha was inflexible and cruel and she said no. So I went hungry. Later ah ma studied me and said I was starting to look old. Her heart softened and she gave me a biscuit, bless my ah ma.

I told cha, nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh.

 

You are my sunshine

November 28th 2008 8:41 am
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Something very unfortunate happened to someone Fomfomfom knows. Everyone was shocked. I guess it hit too close to home this time. But nothing in my little doggy world has changed so I am comforted.

Today the security guard uncle took a picture of me. I like him better than the other one. He gives good massages and he remembers my name. The other one calls me goodboy everytime he sees me. Sometimes he calls me goodgirl too. He is so confused I don't know where to start.

Lemme tell you about my biscuits. Cha says that I am only allowed one biscuit after I eat my kibble. That is the rule. I hear her loud and good. So last night, I ate one kibble and I told Ah bee I wanted to claim my biscuit. Ah bee said she wants to box me. Just now at supper, I ate 2 kibbles and I told Fomfomfom I wanted that biscuit. Fomfomfom wanted to box me too. Then Cha says that I have to eat at least 20 kibbles before I get a biscuit. These people are trying to pull an Animal Farm on me but I didn't bite. I'm principled.

Now if only I can stop thinking about that biscuit.

 

El cheapo

November 27th 2008 7:32 am
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Cha said this morning she may want to buy a wii coz its price has dropped some. I was excited, coz I thought then I would be able to play the dance game. There would be a mat, won't there, and I can jump jump jump on the mat. I can compete with fomfomfom and I'm sure I'd win. Cha said there's a yoga game and I can do yoga too. I'd stand on one leg and clasp my hands together and say "om". I won't fall over coz my tail will be like another leg. I can keep fit with ah ma.

Then cha said the price hasn't dropped to her satisfaction and maybe she won't buy the wii after all. I was disappointed. Cha said if it's games i want, she can switch on the xbox for me and she'd put on the legend on the drunken bastards for me. I declined. Drunken what-stards, compared to yoga? What lack of sophistication.

At night I made fomfomfom watch the little nonya with me. Coz I'm a little non. I watched it upside down while enjoying a belly rub and fomfomfom watched it right side up. I'm sure our enjoyment was the same.

 

Leaves don't grow on trees. Not here they don't.

November 26th 2008 7:19 am
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I found a leaf on the balcony just now. It was all dried up and crisp, the way I like my leaves. I love leaves. I love picking them up and tearing them into tiny pieces. I haven't done that since we moved. There were plenty of leaves where we used to stay but none here. Until I found one just now that is.

I was so delighted with my find I trooped off to Ah ma's room with it. I jumped on the sofa and began tearing the leaf into bits. Ah ma was horrified because I was leaving leaf bits all over her sofa. She tried to take my precious leaf away from me. So I bit her.

She got really mad at me and she scolded me. That didn't really bother me. So she kept scolding me and I just stared into space. She said she would scold me for two days. I didn't care. And then she said I would not get any meat for two days.

I can't have that so I went over and licked her hand immediately. Ah ma laughed and gave me a belly rub and that was the end of that little episode.

Ah ma loves me and I love Ah ma.

 

Tail waggin' da dog

November 25th 2008 7:22 am
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I was like fomfomfom's shadow today. I followed her everywhere all afternoon. Cha asked why fomfomfom is in cha's room. I can stay but fomfomfom is not welcome. Fomfomfom explained that since her shadow is here, she must follow.

Then fomfomfom was chased out and I followed.

Ah gong helped me put on my leash so that I may go for my afternoon walk. I guess it was the first time but I was in no mood to savour it coz my walk beckoned.

My walk is very important.

 

Getting too smart for everyone

November 24th 2008 5:30 am
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Times are bad. People don't tell people things anymore. They think they have the right to do all sorts of things. They think they can keep things from others. It is strange. They think they have the right when they don't. They think they have the authority but they don't. They think they have a brain but alas.

But no problem. All it takes is a good hard slap left right centre up down inside and outside. Oops, that's 7 slaps.

I'll do it!

 

Boney biscuit

November 23rd 2008 7:28 am
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There's this new tidbit I have. It's a free gift when I buy the ultra-no-allergen kibble. It's a bag full of delicious bone shaped biscuits and I get 2 a day, after breakfast and after supper. I always look longingly at the bag when my mamas forget to give me one and they will be quick to correct their error.

I didn't feel like supper tonight, only the biscuit so I looked longingly. Fomfomfom said I must eat my kibble supper first before I can have it and to emphasize her point, she took one biscuit and put it into my kibble bottle. Of course I had nothing but biscuit in my mind after that and I refused kibble politely.

The standoff was resolved in a while when ah ma came out and told fomfomfom to give me the biscuit and stop torturing me. Then ah ma looked fondly at me while I ate the biscuit and fomfomfom was the villain. I told ah ma, thank you ah ma!

Ah ma loves me and I love ah ma.

 

Goubuli not.

November 22nd 2008 8:39 am
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I forgot to mention in my entry last night that Cha and I saw a piece of snake skin near the generator room yesterday. It's a good thing we only saw the shed skin and not the snake itself. That would have been creepy. Fomfomfom was rather freaked out and she kept telling everyone to hit the snake 7 inches below its head if we ever run into one. I don't ever want to run into a snake coz I heard that Wernie's dog was killed by one. So remember if you ever see a snake, run. If you can't, remember Fomfomfom's 7 inches rule.

Today was a much better day. Ah ma kept her promise and made me goubuli buns. I had 4 of them. They were so delish I even ate the skin. I don't usually like flour but I finished everything on my plate. But I think they should get a new name. Goubuli can't be goubuli. Not when I had 4 of them.

Ah ma didn't want to give me a belly rub just now and so I threatened to leave home. I told her that I will pack up my bottle and check into Shangrila without her. She only chuckled.

I forgive her on account of the buns.

 

Kan wo li bu li

November 21st 2008 7:23 am
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Ah ma made pork buns that were both steamed and fried at the same time and I was intrigued, especially by the way ah bee inhaled them. But there were none for me. Fomfomfom rebuked ah ma and ah ma was contrite. Ah bee said ah ma should make some goubuli buns for me next time so we can all eat buns together and how happy that will be. But I thought, goubuli means "a bun that even a dog ignores", so how can I enjoy a goubuli bun? If I do, it'll have to change its name.

Such oxymorons disturb me. Yet the way the buns smelled today, I think I can overcome it.

Yes I can.

 

Doggone faces

November 20th 2008 7:15 am
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The stockmarket wasn't doing too well today and fomfomfom said to ah bee, look at those doggone faces. It turns out the other face belongs to ah gong, and my face wasn't even half as doggone as ah gong's.

And I'm much better at the stock market than ah gong. I have standing instructions to ah bee: buy me one share of SGX at the lowest price for the day. And sell at the highest. Like this, I'll be assured of profits every day. It's so simple I wonder why ah gong is so perplexed, and what sort of method he is using. Besides, it'll supplement my meagre pocket money of 40 cents.

 
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