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Happy birthday to me!

October 10th 2008 8:03 am
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It is my birthday again today. I am 4 years and 10 months today and I got a slice of pandan chiffon cake. I shared it with fomfomfom and we had it for dessert after dinner.

It was shih tzu day at the vet's today. We had one here, one there, even one baby sleeping on the magazine table. It was disgraceful. But he looked less than a month old so we didn't scold him. We went to see the vet coz we received a rabies vaccination reminder. We thought it was dodgy coz it came with other irrelevant reminders so we thought their computer system probably had rabies. Indeed the vet confirmed the clinic had rabies. And I finally put on some weight. Now I am 5.55kg, fomfomfom is pleased.

At night ah ma came back from her gambling spree and she rang the bell and we opened the door to see her standing with 2 tall caucasian girls. They are our neighbours, on school exchange programmes. They were making pizzas and wanted to borrow a cup of flour. A cup! ah ma exclaimed. Take the whole bag! They were happy and we were happy and we settled to ah ma's heroic tales at the gambling tables.

I waited all night but the girls didn't come by to give me a pizza.

 

One night only

October 9th 2008 8:30 am
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Ah ma is in another country gambling up a storm, and ah gong seems a little lonely. We were all in cha's room, and ah gong was hovering at the door, asking this, then that, then giving advice. Ah bee was entertaining him, fomfomfom was not talking, I was listening carefully, and cha finally threw him out.

I thought he's just a lonely old man who wanted to talk. Ah bee suggested I sleep in ah gong's room tonight, I will listen to him talk all night and then he can tuck me in. It will only be for a night coz ah ma comes back tomorrow and they can go back to enjoying each other's company.

 

Profits

October 8th 2008 8:46 am
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I heard ah ma go off again early this morning, when it was still dark. I scratched the door to ask cha to let me out so I may say goodbye to ah ma, but cha didn't open the door for me. Sigh, ah ma was off on one of her numerous trips, I guess not saying goodbye is no biggie. She does it all the time. The more important thing is I forgot to tell ask ma to bet $50 on big for me.

But I had profits elsewhere. It seems the price of gold went up today, so I told fomfomfom that I will take the profits on the 500 ounces of gold I told her to buy yesterday. Fomfomfom tried to protest I didn't tell her to buy anything yesterday but I would not have it. I asked ah bee to calculate the profits and--was that a wink I saw from fomfomfom to ah bee?--after some intense mindwork, ah bee grandly declared that the profit is a lollipop. Satisfied, I told ah bee to remember to collect my lollipop and put it in my shoebox.

Trading is such satisfying business.

 

Kiss and tell

October 7th 2008 7:34 am
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I met an iguana today. I hadn't had time to ask his name before he ran away. I wanted to catch him to bring home for fomfomfom but I only managed to kiss him. I didn't want to kiss and tell so I made no mention of the encounter to anyone at home.

Ah bee, however, adheres to an altogether different moral code. It is reprehensible how she spilt the beans and fomfomfom made her wipe my mouth before she will let me kiss her. Next time I witness any of ah bee's encounters of such kind I will shout it from the rooftops. And then I will scrub out her mouth too.

 

2 cats and 3 dogs this morning. Whee!

October 6th 2008 8:40 am
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I got this big swollen bump on my right eyelid this afternoon. Fomfomfom was so alarmed she screamed for cha to come take a look, who dismissed it as an insect bite. Or, aha! It might be the duck fomfomfom fed me for lunch. An allergy! Cha gave fomfomfom dirty looks and said I shouldn't be eating too much meat.

I went for a walk with the lovely fomfomfom and when I came back, the bump was gone. Aha! It must have been an allergy, cha declares. Fomfomfom got only dirty looks. I told fomfomfom, it's ok. I will treat her well. Just keep all that exotic meat coming.

Ah ma was watering her plants with fishy water again. I had to get some of that tasty stuff, so I licked the flower pot. That, ah ma saw. Cha didn't tell ah ma I licked the soil too in case ah ma drags me for mouth cleaning. I got a scolding from cha and the lovely fomfomfom kissed me and said it's ok.

At night me and fomfomfom and ah ma watched the dow drop off a cliff and I decided I had to sleep soon. Coz not many people will be able to sleep tonight and grandpa zhou will be very free to play the swing with me. Whee!

 

World Animal Day

October 5th 2008 8:12 am
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According to the papers, apparently it is world 'nimal day today. Cha informed me of that pleasant fact, and I thought, good for all you animals out there!

I asked cha when it is world baby day coz that would be when I can celebrate. Cha said she didn't know, but we can privately designate today as world smelly baby day and I can celebrate.

I thought, that's not a bad idea at all. Though I had a bath today and I'm not a smelly baby. I will be sure not to bathe on this day next year so that I can celebrate my day properly.

 

Cha cha cha!

October 4th 2008 10:19 am
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Today is Cha's birthday. One more year and she'll be tofu dregs. That's not the saddest part about today; the saddest bit came when a cake was delivered to our place for Cha. Ah ma asked, why is there a birthday cake? It's not anyone's birthday. It's my birthday today Ma, Cha replied. Isn't your birthday long over, Ah ma asked.

Ouch.

The good thing is, the rest of the day was happy for her.

Together now, CHACHACHA!

 

Ah bee should only eat McChickens from now

October 3rd 2008 10:10 am
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Ah gong called me dog dog this morning. I told him my name is xiaoping and he should call me that. He insisted on calling me dog dog and we had words. I told cha I'm going to call him old man from now on.

Ah bee's supper was a McSpicy. I had to have some, and my word, it was delicious, but so spicy. My stummy is rumbling now.

 

When I saw that coconut, I had to say conut, conut, coconut

October 2nd 2008 9:25 am
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We saw a CSI miami advert on tv. Fomfomfom muttered, horatio is an awful name. Ah bee agreed enthusiastically and the 2 of them made like poets and went, ratio, ratio, horatio. Cha screamed that's lame and they said, we didn't say that, ping did.

I said, yeah, whatever. You can put everything on my head, just keep that fried fish coming.

 

Happy Children's Day to me

October 1st 2008 7:39 am
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Ah ma has taken to watering her precious plants with water she used to wash rice, fish etc. So last night she put a tub of fish water into the fridge and this morning, as the cold water was awaiting its destiny on the balcony, I lapped at it. Unfortunately, ah ma caught me and I got me some furious mouth cleaning.

As I sulked the afternoon away, I felt some rumblings in my stummy and it was a stummyache so I pooped in front of the stairs. It was the first time I'd had to poop in this house, and in a great hurry too, so the location wasn't choice. Ah ma found the pile and everyone praised me for not eating my poop. And I got lots of lovin' coz I presumably was having a stummyache.

It is Children's Day today. As is tradition, ah bee came back with a happy meal for me. The toy is a car of dubious quality, unlike the cars of yore, as ah bee recounted with great regret. I didn't like it, but the plastic cow piggybank was something else. It was a free gift from the cinema. I tried to bite its head off and when fomfomfom, mindful of the chemicals it could contain, tried to take it away, I bit her. Later, they hid the thing and I am left in regret. Chicken mcnuggets do not assuage regret.

 
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