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Ants in the water jug

May 21st 2015 9:21 am
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I woke up at 4am and puked all over the room. Later ah bee would say it's coz I ate liver soup and pork and kibble altogether last night. And they decreed I cannot eat too much tonight.

So fomfomfom fed me kibble for supper and counted carefully what I ate. Suddenly ah bee and Cha said stop, and I looked longingly at the kibble and fomfomfom looked longingly at me. Ah bee said, xp can fill up with water.

Oooh, ah bee, a pox on you and I hope you find ants in your water forever. So there.

 

Huff and puff and blow your house down

May 19th 2015 8:09 am
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That's what it felt like this evening. It started pouring all of a sudden and the winds were so strong. It's a good thing I was home already. And fortified by liver. Hot liver soup is the best thing to have on a cold rainy night.

Ah ma's window was leaking some so doomsday bee proudly brought out her stash of duct tape. Only ah ma thought her yellow tape's too ugly so she didn't use it in the end.

We don't ever want to have to use her supplies.

 

Tramadol

May 18th 2015 7:33 am
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I ate a lot of grass this morning coz I wasn't feeling wonderful. But I didn't throw up. Then I felt better and all was well.

Then I read that the painkiller I was on, tramadol, is a very hip drug in Egypt. The doc put me on it when my back hurt a few months ago and I was stoned out of my mind. They're still marveling at how unruffled I was on the way over to the vet. I was docile. That was the only time in 11 years, I tell you.

Anyway, tramadol. Yes, I speak with authority. It's a powerful drug.

 

Cause and effect

May 17th 2015 8:35 am
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Fomfomfom cut my hair today. It's really ratty and so I bit her coz she was doing such a bad job. She went around telling everyone it's ugly because I refused to cooperate and even bit her. Of course everyone believed me and not her.

We saw the old man and his Maltese from the other condo today. He thought we had moved away coz he hasn't seen us since Chinese new year. He and the other old man with the King Charles even had a discussion on when they last saw us. Giggles. I'm famous even in the next condo.

Then we saw baby and Fomfomfom decided to call her Baby Longlegs. Heehee. We asked if her grandmother is doing okay coz last we heard she was bedridden. We found out that she had passed away nearly a year ago but there was no funeral so we didn't know. It was a little sad but grandmother was 93 so I guess no one can complain.

Such is life.

 

Koala p

May 16th 2015 9:16 am
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Ah bee's got a wedding to attend tonight and she'd be in a long dress. She asked if I wanted to go with her. You can hide under my skirt and no one will know.

I pointed out that her skirt doesn't quite reach the ground so people will still see me. Then you just hug my calf like a koala, Xiaoping. But I told her I'll get tired at some point and won't be able to hang on.

No problem, I'll make you a harness and strap you to my calf.

But people will hear my bell when you walk, i said. Then I'll tell them I'm wearing an anklet, she replied.

This person cannot take a hint.

 

Stew

May 15th 2015 8:59 am
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I wasn't in the happiest of moods this morning. It started from last evening when it rained and my walk was unsatisfactory. I didn't manage to poop. Then this morning I was a little constipated so it made me even more upset. When it began to rain after my walk, I lost my temper. I barked randomly and everyone was so concerned. When they finally realized maybe it's the rain, they started laughing. Look at that silly xp, who knows how long she's been stewing away, fom said. Don't worry, she added, the rain will stop before your evening walk.

She's lucky it did. Hmph.

 

Baby planet

May 14th 2015 4:19 am
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Ah ma was channel surfing and she came across animal planet. Oooh, I want to watch baby planet, she declares. It was baby panda time.

I dunno why, but I'm not very happy when ah ma looks at baby animals. I don't mind when she watches unlovely old hippos though.

 

Bag of worms

May 13th 2015 6:42 am
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That day we saw a worm crossing the path. Then ah bee pretended she was picking it up, and stuffing it into a make-believe bag. Then she picked up a lot more pretend worms and soon the bag was full. Ah bee grabbed it at the top and shook it at me. Is this what u want to be, xp, is this what u want to be?, she cried.

I know they always complain I'm a wriggling bag of worms, but this is beyond stupid. I hope no one saw that display.

They're so embarrassing.

 

White chocolate

May 12th 2015 3:53 am
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I hadn't seen chocolate in the longest time, and when we met at the sandpit today, she absolutely went to pieces. She barked non-stop, wanted to kiss me, and was altogether too happy. It's flattering coz she's usually quite aloof. I think she really missed me. She even kissed fomfomfom.

Then our joyful meeting ended and we had to go and we said our byebyes. Jojo suddenly stopped us and said, oh yes, his parents are starting a new business, an online shop selling dresses.

I guess he suddenly remembered fomfomfom and ah bee are girls and decided to do some advertising. Maybe that's what chocolate was doing,

 

Ah ma's roses

May 11th 2015 8:19 am
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2 days ago, ah ma happily came home with a pot of yellow roses. She proudly watered them and hung them up together with the nice orchids. Suffice to say the roses are almost dead today. Ah ma put it most eloquently when she glimpsed her flowers and exclaimed "aiyoh!" I guess the heat got to them yellow roses.

And ah bee was so irritating tonight. She kept making a clicking sound next to my face and I wanted her to stop so I said "woof". They were delighted. I don't know why.

Doggies all know how to say woof.

 
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