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So embarrassing

September 11th 2014 7:44 am
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Ah bee and I saw a tabby yesterday. She picked me up immediately coz she knows I'll want to get at the cat. And then she started making meowing noises at the cat. The cat which was lying down got up slowly and started walking menacingly towards us. Its tail was upright.

We ran away so quick. I hope no one saw us fleeing from the cat.

 

Heroines

September 10th 2014 8:21 am
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Today jojo was telling ah bee about the white dog he saw running around unsupervised. He asked ah bee if she's seen anyone looking for the dog.

Just while they were talking, we saw the white dog. And the security guard happened to ride by and he told us which unit the white dog belongs to. And then he rode away. Yes we know. Bad person. Karma. Pox on him.

So anyway, chocolate and I (with a little help from jojo and ah bee), we delivered the white dog back to its home.

Happy day.

 

Karma

September 9th 2014 9:41 am
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Today we read about this man in Hong Kong who is wanted by the police for putting his dog in the churning washing machine. When he heard the police was going to get him, he posted on Facebook and said he's going back to China.

We believe in karma.

 

Mid autumn festival

September 8th 2014 11:04 am
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It's maf today so of course I got lanterns. I had 2 of them. The first is of a cartoon baby snake and I disposed of it quickly by stomping on it and then tearing it to pieces. The second one had Loony Toons characters all over it. Both Cha and ah bee's boyfriend were confounded by it; they took a really long time to assemble that one. I didn't like it anyway coz it was too structured and enforced with wires on the inside so I couldn't destroy it.

So ah ma hung it from between her mattress and the frame and it was at a perfect height for me. I was happy watching the light change colours.

Happy maf everyone!

 

XPITPGITWWW

September 7th 2014 9:23 am
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My fringe is a little long and Fomfomfom is not around to cut it. So Ah ma has been scheming to tie it up with a rubber band.

Poor Ah ma. She's so delusional. It's okay I still love her very much.

In other news, Ah bee tells me she dreamt of her dead grandmother last night. We think it's very strange coz it's been a really long time since she passed on. The Chinese believe that when you dream of dead people, it's because they have something to tell you.

I can't imagine what her ah ma has to tell her but I think she should go offer her incense tomorrow.

 

Where's fomfomfom

September 6th 2014 10:22 am
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Fomfomfom left with her luggage today. She said she's going away for two weeks and she can't bear to leave me for so long. Yes she is needy that way.

So ten minutes after she left, ah bee took a picture of me and sent it to her and told her to cry and die.

We practise tough love in this house.

 

Ah bee who

September 5th 2014 10:06 am
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A strange woman came into our house late last night. I was about to call the police but everyone seem to know her. So I approached and she kissed me.

of course! It was Ah bee! I recognise that smelly mouth anywhere.

I spent the whole of today guilt-tripping her for disappearing for so long.

 

Senile and poor

September 4th 2014 7:57 am
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We were all ready to put heartworm medicine on me today. Fomfomfom booked a slot with ah ma for me to bathe. Cha asked fomfomfom to remove my collar. Later fomfomfom asked Cha why I'm not behaving like a madwoman, like I usually do. Cha exclaimed that she had forgotten the heartworm medicine. And there I was running around naked without my collar. Of course I didn't bathe today.

And fomfomfom whispered to me she put $17 worth of petrol in her little car today. I didn't ask her why but I thought perhaps she's not doing too well financially.

I'm quite a sensitive soul.

 

The match

September 3rd 2014 5:09 am
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Nothing happened today so I will write about yesterday and expose fomfomfom. We were passing by the badminton court when grandpa shinri held up his badminton racket and told her to play with his grandson. Fomfomfom politely declined and pointed to me but grandpa shinri took my leash and handed her his racket. Fomfomfom had no choice but to play. When he started keeping score, fomfomfom was horrified. We thought perhaps we could play just 30 seconds and then flee. It became a 5 minute match. It was real intense coz fomfomfom was desperate to get to me so she thrashed poor kenji, who has lots of potential, by the way.

Anyway, the 5 minutes almost killed fomfomfom so I solemnly told her she needs to start exercising. How unfit we are.

 

Insoles

September 2nd 2014 8:11 am
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The most notable thing that happened today is ah ma bought new insoles for her shoes. Then she got out scissors and cut them to fit in her shoes. I'm very happy for ah ma.

And ah ma cooked a big pot of bamboo shoots for dinner. Fomfomfom declared she had been smelling it stew away for a whole day, and she ate a lot of it. Then she kept farting during my evening walk.

I didn't smell anything so maybe bamboo shoots produce nice gas.

 
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