Turn Left Turn Right

(Page 10 of 308: Viewing Diary Entry 91 to 100)  
[First 10 Diary Entries] Page Links:  5  6  7  8  9  10  11  12  13  14  15  [Last 10 Diary Entries]  

Bloody Mint

October 27th 2014 6:19 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

Today I got mowed down by the Mint. I hate it. They call it my pet but I really have no feelings for it. All it does is sweep and mop and mow me down.

I'm giving it up for adoption.

 

GM

October 26th 2014 5:19 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

Ah bee and fom have been bloated for weeks now and they cannot understand why. Then fom had a eureka moment and she said maybe it's all the tofu we have been eating for lunch. GM soy products apparently can cause estrogen levels to go crazy - some guy drank 1 litre of soy milk daily for we don't know how long and his estrogen levels were higher than a woman's.

Modern living is so hazardous.

 

It's worth it

October 25th 2014 7:22 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

Yesterday fomfomfom was cutting liver in the kitchen when I caught a whiff of it. I stood patiently outside the kitchen and fomfomfom was so impressed by my sense of smell and courtesy that she immediately boiled 2 big pieces for me.

And then I had diarrhoea this morning.

 

Real old eggs

October 24th 2014 7:11 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

Today I went shopping in the minimart and I discovered these fantastic smelling eggs. They were salted eggs and century eggs. Ah bee and the shop auntie then got into a discussion about whether century eggs were really made using horse urine. I had to set them straight; how ignorant they are.

Horse urine is used to make hormone pills, not century eggs. Century eggs are of course made using centuries. Duh.

 

Eyes and ears

October 23rd 2014 8:33 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

Ah ma says her vision is a bit cloudy these days so cha brought her to see an eye doctor today. Turns out she doesn't have cataract; her eyes are a little dry that's all. Nothing to worry about.

We cannot say the same for ah bee's ears. She went to watch two tennis matches today and she said Maria Sharapova's grunts sounded so obscene her ears nearly fell out.

Oooh.

 

P

October 22nd 2014 12:32 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

Fomfomfom says I'm the most wonderful thing in the world and like me, all things wonderful start with p. Like pooches, puppies and pies. Also porridge, pickles and pasta.

Then ah bee giggled and said, "Porridge, pickles and pucumbers".

Er. I think she doesn't get it.

 

Rainy day

October 21st 2014 8:10 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

It rained heavily in the morning and we thought that was it, but it rained again just before I went for my evening walk. Everything was splooshy and I was dainty and I wasn't happy. I didn't want to take my daily pic for "From bugs to bow wow". So ah bee had to make do with a picture taken elsewhere.

All that rain coz ah ma washed the bedsheets.

 

Best before, good after

October 20th 2014 4:35 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

Ah bee realized the Tim Tams she brought back from Australia are past their best before date. Fomfomfom said no problem, she'll take care of them.

In this house, we believe it's best before but still good after.

 

Offended

October 19th 2014 2:29 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

We saw a German Shepherd today and it looked at me quizzically for a while before going away.

Ah bee said it must have been wondering what kind of a rodent I am.

I'm so insulted.

 

Bad music

October 18th 2014 7:54 am
[ Leave A Comment ]

Ah bee bought so much music that she had to listen all day with earphones, or else she can't finish them all. Then she must have gotten bored so she stuck her earphones in my ears. I didn't like the music at all so I ran away and hid under the piano.

I didn't like the bom bom bom.

 
  Sort By Oldest First

Xiao Ping


Subscribe

(What does RSS do?)