ScOut and About

I'm like a fine whine

I turned 5 today and if I do say so myself I am coming into my prime. I'm darn cute, I'm obedient without being obsequious, I am not shy about making my needs known and I have perfected the art of a well placed auditory request.

My whine and I have matured into sublime perfection.

Oh, what is that...it's w-i-n-e that ages nicely?
Hmmm, that does change things a bit.

Never mind.

scatology

When planning my morning constitutional, I like to make my deposits at the faaaaar end of the leash. I will cover the maximum real estate, sniff around, circle, sniff some more...no not quite right...a little further out, maybe over to the left...assume the posi...no not yet, sniff, circle...really I'm almost there...ahhh.

It's unfortunate that my creations end up in biodegradable bags rather than in their natural biodegradable state, but humans seem to have an unnatural obsession with our movements.

I also like to make sure I place my Scoutness in as many different locations as possible.
That's just the kind of girl I am.

how do you spell thief?

C-A-T!

Yes, that's right the same brazen feline that lounges around in our back yard taunting me with their orange nonchalance is none other than the neighborhood cat burgler!!

Mom notices that dads outdoor flip flop is looking a little chewed and he notices the other one is gone, which reminds him that the neighbor had asked him before if he was missing one. This led us straight to the criminals house to reclaim the other gnawed on shoe. According to his accomplice, apparently this is a habitual thing.

Nobody's safe!! Call the police!! Throw his furry butt in jail!!

Disappointingly, mom and dad declined to press charges, but are going to be very careful about their flip flops in the future.

the one that got away

I did it!
I caught my first crab!!
I have been honing my crab chasing skills for many dog moons, but they are formidable foes; wily critters and FAST in a crabby sort of way. Most of the time they are in the rocks and scamper to safety before I can get em. Today I chased one over the sand and into the water, stuck my head in and came up with a crab leg in my mouth...with a crab attached! It was so exciting!! Then I got hit by a wave and lost my grip!! I tried to retrieve it, but it was too late. Ahhh, the fickle fingers of fate.

I'm tellin' you...it was huge !!...monsterous...the .biggest .crab. evah...but it got away.

You'll have to take my word for it.

A dog's work is never done.

Mom has been very remiss in not allowing me to update my diary since our move to our new house. Apparently it takes longer for people to take care of their business, like getting internet connected, that it does for us dogs to pee on every new thing. So we just got our new internet connection a MONTH after moving. But really, to give her credit, if all she had to do was pee on the computer I'm sure that would have happened before now.

Truthfully I have been VERY busy in our new place. I have been involved in many excellent activities, like chicken chasing, frog stare downs, territorial peeing in our new yard, getting my a$$ kicked by my sister, whining to be let out on demand, grass eating, checking out the neighbor cats... just to name a few.

Excuse me, I must run, I think a I hear a chicken taunting me.

Reformed

I am being very good.

Despite, or perhaps because of, rumors to the contrary.

Garçon!

I do enjoy my meals. I have an unerring ability to know when it is time to eat, but will start staring at the waiter, er...mom about a half hour before, just in case I can push an earlier reservation.

Then I take my time (unlike my sister the Hoover) to fully experience my food...

...I smell, I savor, I dine, I crunch, I lick, I...

...burp.

May I see the dessert menu?

"issues"...moi?

I have noticed a precipitous decline in the number of times that mom is willing to take me to the dog park lately. She does not seem to understand that there are times when I have to get a little, shall we say, FIRM with the occasional dog who gets my hackles up. It's usually in the get to know you phase of the relationship and it's tough to say exactly what happens that crosses my line, except that once it's crossed it's hard to change my mind.

This is a relatively new development and mom doesn't seem to be a bit pleased about the whole thing. She seems to think it is MY "issue" and that she needs to figure out what to do differently with me so that it doesn't keep happening.

It sounds suspiciously like therapy.

resolutions?

...oh, i thought it was revolution.

I'm all for a little regime change but don't expect me to do anything different.

I am perfect the way I am.

scardey dog

I dislike loud noises. Alot.
I will just stop and refuse to move. Period.
No way. No how.
Don't even try to tell me it's okay. Liar.
Just make it go away. Thanks.

expressing myself

Let me put it to you simply...my butt malfunctioned and a gloved finger had to "express" my recalcitrant gland.

That prompted MY expression; "hole-y s**t!"

I am hoping I can find a way to express myself without assistance next time.

I'm HOT!

That is I am partial to seeking out experiences in which my elevated temperature causes me to pant in delirious ecstasy.
In Oregon I used to plant myself in front of the heater, but that action is missing since the move to the tropics. But I manage to find enough hotness here to satisfy my cravings.
After my mid-day pee...I plop myself on the concrete in a anticipatory swoon of the baking to come.
When the clothes come out of the dryer...I'm on it baby!
On the beach...no shade for this pooch, it's sand and sun all the way.
What can I say...
I'm hot!

concierge extraordinaire

I'm not sayin' I'm easy or anything, but when it comes to visitors in the guest room, I'm just...well...friendly. I like to sneak in the middle of the night and add an extra little aloha to their slumber.

What guest wouldn't enjoy waking up to my feets staring them in the face from under the blankies? Hmmm? Try getting that kind of treatment in one of those 5 star hotels!

I didn't think so.

I pee, therefore I am

On the beach yesterday I marked my existence (Yes, I know I'm a girl...what's your point?) for the world to know on anything I could sling my cootchy over:

I peed on sand;
I peed on poop;
I peed on a dead bird;
I peed on a coconut;
I peed on a stick;
I peed on a dead fish;
I peed on some rope;
I peed on plastic;
I peed on a rock;
I peed on burnt wood;
I peed on grass;
I peed on a shrub;
I peed on a shell;
I peed on driftwood;
I might have even peed on pee!

No existential crisis for this pup!

It's a girl's prerogative

When getting ready to go paddling on the river, it is imperative to have the correct equipment:
kayaks...check,
paddlers (mom&dad)...check,
float coats with convenient handles on the back...check,
towels to drape across the front so I don't slip...check,
fresh water...check,
treats o' plenty...check.
Ahhh, this is the life. Floatin' in the kayak with dad...

Wait just a darn minute! This is unacceptable! Tully is over there with mom! Stop! Let me off! I must be over there! There is better than here. IT IS! If you don't believe me, then I will just have to jump around and whine until you take me seriously!

Oh joy! Hi Tully!, hi mom!, aren't you glad I'm here with you now?

Oops! Sorry about pushing you in Tully, maybe there's not enough room here on the front for both of us. You go over with dad and I'll stay here with mom.

Ahhh, floatin' in the kayak with mom...

Hold on! Stop already! I changed my mind! I NEED to be in the kayak with dad! There is better than here!

IT IS!

chickity chompz

Chickity chickens are everywhere and I have yet to chompz on just one! I am doing my dogged best to sneak up on the little feathery rats but they are just FAST. And I am all too often hobbled by a neck restraint that puts me at a distinct disadvantage.

Tully and I camethisclose to catching one the other day when we were on an early morning off leash walk. I flushed one out of the bushes and off we went in hot pursuit with squawkin' and feathers flyin'! Mom's screaming really put a damper on the fun, especially when she chased me down and grabbed me by the previously mentioned restraint.

Snatched from the jaws of victory!

I believe it was Winston Churchill, who rather looked like a dog himself, who said "Never, never, never give up."

Hear that chickens?

Ellatious!

Okay, now it's official.
The amazing Ella dog has been on Diary Central more times than I can count on my paw! There is no doubt that that Dogster Dog has got his eye on that girl.
What's there not to love!...She is sumpin' special!

failure is not an option

hmm, hmmm...time to play. What toy gets the honor today? Let me just roll around on it a bit to make sure. Oh yeah, excellent choice. Hey, you! You over there...hello...time to play with me!

What!?

I won't take...what is that word?....for an answer. I will drop my chosen toy at your feet. I will make noise. I will jump around. I will stare. If you ignore me I will get closer. If you tell me to wait while you stare at the computer I will jump on your lap, put my paws on your chest and stare you down, that's right, straight in the face.

Are you starting to get my drift?

If you want to play don't bother. I really can't be at your beck and call.

it's about time

We were finally sprung from exile after the folks tired of galavanting around the mainland without us. Fortunately mom had the great foresight to buy us many gifts and tasty treats to bribe herself back into good graces.

Okay, it wasn't so bad.

I am not above charming the camp counselors to get a little preferential treatment. I only had one occasion to b*tch bark, so I was on pretty good behavior. I hug out with my sister mostly. And don't tell mom this, but they fed us canned food...nummy numster canned food! They told mom "your dogs have no trouble eating"...well, duh...it was canned food!

Still, delish food not withstanding, it is good to have the pawrents back home.
*sigh*

summer camp my a**

I'm really not sure what the mom and dad have up their sleeve, but I'm thinkin' it involves them going somewhere without us.

I do not like this at all.

Just because they call the place a "pet resort" doesn't mean we'll be gettin' prime rib and doggie massages. Mom keeps sayin', think of this as summer camp...you'll have fun...really.

Uh-huh, whatever you need to tell yourself mom.

learned in obedience class

I am trainable.

Mom is not.

well whaddya know

I gots to be one of the today's featured diaries on the Diary Central page! Just in time to share my mom's embarassing poop story. Sure I'm the third one down, but I'm just happy to be on the same page with all the other doggie diaries.

I also got awfully nice congrats from a couple of way cool doggies, whose diaries entertain me on a regular basis. Thanks to oh so sweet Ella and the very talented Nubby Puppy! I also got a pug hug from Pippin! How fun is that?!

I'd like to thank all those who made this possible. Thanks mom for letting me use the computer. Thanks Dogster for having this rawkin' web site. Thanks all my pals for the fun and inspiration they add to my furry existence.

I woof you all!!

so busted

Picture this:
mom is taking us on our daily morning walk and it's early and dark. We always are obliging enough to do our poo-ing within the first block or two from the house, but of course never in the same place. Variety is the spice of live, no? But I digress.

So I find a choice spot in a corner lot under a palm tree. Sweet. Mom is bent over looking for my business in the dark with one of her never ending supply of biodegradable doody bags and trying to make sure she gets it all when a truck, a BIG truck with chrome rims, stops and silently stares at her.

uh-oh.

She continues to look for and pick up the poop, but now she's really nervous and it's not helping her poop aquisition skills.
"What are you doing...on my lawn" says the truck.
um...picking up poop, sez mom, anticipating that the conversation will deteriorate from there.

Mom has used her considerable defenses to block the unhappy experience of being lectured by a very displeased truck. However even as she had to conceed that the truck had the right to tell her we couldn't use the lawn as our personal bathroom, she was also sure that the truck did not fully appreciate the fact that she was a responsible pet owner and was actually picking up the poop.

Didn't bother me at all.

Aloha is hello, good bye and love...

Aloha oe, aloha oe,
One fond embrace, a hoi ae au
Until we meet again, until we meet again

Aloha Elvis

hostess with the mostess

Having a visitor from out of state has recently demanded a considerable amount of my time and energy. You see it is my doody, I mean duty, to make sure she enjoyed herself and came away with a favorable impression of , well... me. Why else would anyone travel here but to hang out with the scruffy cuteness of myself?

So I offered the finest 'Ilio aloha:
I rolled over and offered my tummy in a warm welcome...
I licked her feets to make her feel accepted into our pack...
I snoogled on her bed so she wouldn't sleep alone...
I squeaked toys and dropped them on her to entice her inner puppy to play...
I kissed her face to make sure anything missed by the napkin was taken care of...
I generously offered to reduce her portion size (but only when dad wasn't paying attention.)

In other words I did everything doggily possible for her to have a good time and leave with hairs on her clothes and a smile on her face.

Mission accomplished!

nuf said

The only thing I like better than hikin' my duck is sniffin' my butt.

the old bait and switch

I just returned from a class that I thought was going to be a new creative outlet for my terrieristic energy and talent; the o-bee-dance class. You know, "imagine you're the bee" free form movement, performance art peeing, advanced insect chasing, the sniff butt tango...and so much more.

WRONG!

Here was this field full of interesting and talented dogs and we had to stay next to our person THE WHOLE TIME! A travesty of the highest order! There were orders given, corrections and a paltry "good dog" for compliance. I'm sure what happened was illegal and I for one plan to file a grievance with PISSS: Prevention of Indignities to Sensitive Souls Society.

It's just not right!

And neither is that stinky vet that is keeping us all waiting for the word on Elvis. I'm gonna report them too!

LoveHopeElvisLoveHopeElvisLoveHopeElvisLoveHopeElvis LoveHopeElvis

oh won't you stay

We are sad as sad can be.
We just got to be pals with a unique and amazing dog; Elvis the Iziban Hound. He is very sick right now and no one knows what is going to happen, but we have to keep thinking the best! He is getting as much love and care as any dog could because this incredible dog has an incredible family. We are trying to muster up as much paw power as caninely possible to send to our pal. We can't stop thinking about him and we wish there was something, anything more to do.

Check out what Ella has to say about him in A Celebration of All Things Elvis!

We hope he gets to stay.

Kakouko

Ass right!

Being an pono hawaiian dog now I am trying to blend in with the locals instead of getting stink eye as malihini. I gots the flowered collar, the hula girl squeak toy, the hawaiian hound crash pad. I hang out on the beach, sniff coconuts and chase crabs. Shaka!

But I couldn't very well da kine with a haole name, now could I? So mom punched my name into an Hawaiian dictionary site and found my Hawaiian name. Mo' bettah fo me!

It didn't work for Tully, but I think she should be called Lolo...crazy! BOL!

I am Kakouko, hear me bark!

Up to no good

I overheard mom talking to dad about some kind of "obedience class" mom signed up for. Apawrently it's not just for her, she plans to take one of us with her! When she asked the class leader at the orientation which one should come he said, "well, who's your problem child?" I believe my name was put down and I'm not sure I like the implication!

If she wants to learn to be more obedient that's fine with me, just leave me out of it.

hog wild

I got to roll on a dead, dried out wild hog hide today...the skull was even there.

I know!!!
How cool is that!

It's going to be hard to top that one, but a dog's gotta have goals.

om my...

...for me? You shouldn't have mom!

How kind and thoughtful for you to deposit a huge mound of clean warm clothes on the bed for me to snuggle in! Those radiating garments bring me such joy! If you see me panting (hehe-so punny) it's only because I am experiencing the exhilaration of a moment of supreme transcendence.

However it is rather annoying when you insist on removing items from under me and disturbing the serenity of my perfectly toasty pile. Now please just leave me in peace with my heated laundry to fully enjoy my material meditation.

Om...

Happy New Year on the cheap

I'm broke!
It's 2008 and not a Zealie to my name!
I'm not quite sure how that happened, but sure enough my account is coming up a big goose egg zero. It couldn't have been my holiday extravagance!, I think Tully must have been sneaking some when I wasn't looking!

As a result I have to resort to wishing all my loved and admired pals a very heartfelt wish from the affordability of my diary page.
So...
Happy New Year
and have a
Terrierific 2008 !!

Sniff you around!,
Scout

The answer is yes

For a while there I had my mom thinking that I was maturing and growing out of my youthful rolling habits and smelly proclivities...
ha!

During a lovely beach walk the other day, on the lookout for those wiley crabs and elusive birds, I discovered not one, but two opportunities that were just too good to pass up.

Unable to catch a live crab, finding a dead one to roll on was perhaps even more satisfying. What it lacked in chase enjoyment it more than made up for in stench quality. Then, rather than a live bird, I encountered yet another carcass for my putrid indulgence.

How happy I was!,
until the moment of truth came...I was not allowed back into the car until I was doused in a torturous amount of water and cleansed of the smell that I had so blissfully aquired.

Was the universe trying to show me that when we get what we want, it is not always in the way we expect, and there is usually a price to pay?

Will I roll again in my new found maturity?

Do dogs sniff butts?

Dear Santa Paws,

We are in Hawaii now so I hope the address change came through in time.
Here's what I would like:
I know we need water for things to be so beautiful here, but please make it stop raining. I would like lots more sun for walks, beach lounging, dog park visits and chicken watching.
Also I would like for my mom not to have to work. It should be her full time job to hang out with us, play with us, take us places, give us treats and generally be available for lovies at all times.
I want lots of friends to run around and play with all nice and friendly and with no annoying habits or scary behavior! And remind Tully that grabbing my tail to slow me down is not the kind of behavior that gets her on your "nice" list.
Also please make sure that the treat bag is perpetually full of delectable goodies, liberally dispensed.
And lest I seem too self absorbed, please remember all the wonderful doggies that aren't as lucky as I am when you make your rounds this year. Safe and loving furever homes would be a nice stocking stuffer.
A VERY Good Girl,
Scout

The Terrier Has Landed

Yea!
We made it to our new island home!

The trip wasn't so bad! I think mom was seriously stressed out by having to hand us over to the baggage people at the airport, but Tully and I traveled like the international jet setters we are. We breezed through quarentine and were planting our paws in red dirt in no time. Best of all is that our mom and dad are here and we are all together again.

The weather is beautiful and we have already played on the beach (love it!), checked out the dog park (awesome) and gone to the vets (routine checkup). We have not been allowed to chase any of the chickens, but they look delicious!

Time for my afternoon nap after a busy dog park morning.
Aloha!

Leavin' on a jet plane...

It's here.

It's time.

After long weeks of dadlessness there are plans afoot to reunite the family once again. In less than 2 weeks!! mom, dad , Tully and I will be checking in for the flight to Hawaii. I happen to have it on good authority that they will be checking us in as BAGGAGE!!

Really!...BAGGAGE! I don't know about you but isn't that hard not to take personally?! Isn't baggage something you go to therapy to get rid of?!

And all this time I thought we would be in the First Class cabin, sipping beef broth and nibbling, make that wolfing down, filet mignon. I am sorely offended and disappointed. However I do not have a choice, no matter how beseechingly I look at them and whine...I mean plead.

I can't wait to see my dad again, but the plane I can do without!

Oh, what one must endure in this dogs life.

Invasion of the Ring Tailed Catboy

I am Sentry of the Back Door and it is my job to make sure that any wildlife that enters the yard is closely watched, just in case they are up to no good. Really just being in the yard is no good. My job mostly involves whining, I mean sending the warning alarm, at the sight of turkeys, deer and the occasional cat. They fear me.

Mom stubbornly refuses to let me have open access to the yard. It's not my fault there is no fence. I am really perturbed at not having opposible paw pads so I could open the door myself and handle the situation as I see fit; that is either chasing off the offending animal (or, ahem... play with them:o)

The most recent development is quite disturbing though.

Mom has taken to being nice to a very orange and very friendly kitty that meows it up in the back yard. What it is about this interloper that makes him different is still unclear. I have more dogtective work to do to figure that one out. Suffice to say though that she goes out to schmooze with him and leaves us trapped to witness this through the back window!

I know!

I can't take my horrified eyes off the scene. I did manage to poke my head out enough one time to get a whiff of him, though I think that by the way my tail was wagging, mom thought I was inclined to be friendly and want to play. That is just a ruse to lull him into a false sense of security while I stealthly plan to eliminate the competition.

Watch out Ring Tailed Catboy...I am on to you!

Tagged by Crick Lurve!

My beeeutiful friend Cricket has tagged me with LURVE . So, now it's up to me to spread it around and tag three more awesome dogster dogs!!

Here are The Rules: tag three of your pals and write why they deserve to be love tagged! Direct them to your diary for the rules.

Jack! Just look at that muppet mug!! Jack is the kind of guy you want to take home to mom. He was very supportive when my sister Tully came to live with us. (Just between you and me I think she's always had a crush on him!!) He makes us laugh and it doesn't hurt that he is soooo handsome, funny and sweet.

Snooper! This girl provided early encouragment and tech support for our early Dogster efforts. She deserves a hazardous duty award for having to put up living with c-a-t-s, which she does with attitude and humor. You can count on her to put a smile on your face.

Ziggy Moonbeam! This cute girl is about as friendly and generous as they come. She never fails to send congratulations to the dog of the day and week and greetings to whoever else she wants to brighten the day for. She's just adorable and spreads the love without even being tagged!

Honorable love mention goes back to immensely loveable Cricket and her oh so faboo brother Izzie, as well as up to the bridge for the one and only Daisy.

Can't send out enough doggie love!

When the the dad's away...

...we get to sleep with mom!!

This has been forbidden territory since dad "claims" to be somewhat allergic to our kind. (I think he's just being selfish with the king size dog bed.) Since he vanished (aloha!) mom has revised the rules. Tully and I are a little worried that if one pawrent disappears, it could happen again! So now we can, and pretty much do, follow her everywhere. I make sure I am within nose touching distance. If she sits down for any length of time, I'll just plop myself on her feet so that if she needs to move again I'll be alerted.

We miss the dad, but Project Mom Surveilance is in place...and the new sleeping accomodations...
~blissful~
*sigh*

For- Daisy

...For love, that comes wherever life and sense
Are given by God, in thee was most intense;
A chain of heart, a feeling of the mind,
A tender sympathy, which did thee bind
Not only to us Men, but to thy Kind:
Yea, for thy fellow-brutes in thee we saw
A soul of love, love's intellectual law:--
Hence, if we wept, it was not done in shame;
Our tears from passion and from reason came,
And, therefore, shalt thou be an honoured name!
W. Wordsworth 1805.

Something is afoot

There has been waaaaaay too much activity going on in my peaceful home. Mom and dad are up to something and I'm not sure I like it one bit. They didn't ask me if it was okay to disrupt my predictable routine! I'm gettin' kind of nervous and when I'm nervous I get quiet and hungry.

People are in and out, furniture is moving around and things just seem a little too busy. I hear ominous rumblings about moving to someplace called Ha Wa Ii.

WHA...How can this happen! I've never lived anywhere but Oregon!
What is a dog to do?!

I need a snack.

Xtreme eating

I have discovered a new delicacy!

It is the fertilizer layer underneath newly laid sod/grass. We were playing in the back yard of my friend Danner when my mom found me with my nose to the ground snuffling and snorting around like a little furry pig looking for truffles (whatever those are!) For some reason though mom doesn't think this is as wonderful as I do.

Oh, but it smells like poop and tastes like heaven!!

Delish!

I've created a monster!

It started in all innocence.

Campaign PLAY-WITH-ME!! was for getting my shy, brown nose (well I guess you could make a case that all dogs are brown nose!), let's make that suck-up sister to loosen up and act like a dog, for dog sake. I have been dedicated to the cause and tireless in my efforts to remake her into a dog and playmate worthy of the distinction.

Unfortunately she has added a few florishes that put me at a distinct disadvantage. The nerve.

First, she is faster than me. So when I can finally get her to chase me I am working twice as hard. Then, she likes to grab me by the scruff of the neck and take me down!! Sometimes she grabs my tail and shakes it like a squeak toy! Of course if she stops I taunt her with "bet you can't do that again!...I double dog dare you!"

Now she has taken up Scout bowling. She is the ball and I am the pins. She runs up without me seeing her and slams into me, sending me rolling, honest to dog, three times, a** over teakettle!! That wasn't in the playbook.

She's the TullyMonster...and I am having a blast!

I got tagged!!

Holy Shmokes I just got tagged by two of my dog pals: Snooper and Ziggy Moonbeam! This could be more fun than getting Tully to chase me.

Here are the rules of the game!

Each player starts with seven random facts about themselves. Dogs who are tagged, need to post in their Diary the rules & their 7 pawsome facts. Then choose 7 dogs to tag and list their names. Don’t forget to bark them a pmail that they have been tagged and to read your Diary, or, send them a fun Rosette announcing they've been Tagged!

Seven Facts about Scout

1. I am named after the little girl in the book To Kill a Mockingbird and I am curious and spunky and smart just like her...humble too.

2. I am often mistaken for a boy dog and I actually also lift my back left leg ever so slightly off the ground when I pee.

3. I am a stink-a-holic. If it smells, I must roll.

4. I eat grass like a little furry cow. But I freak out when my dad makes cow noises to tease me.

5. I will do anything for a treat. Nothing is beneath my dignity when treats are involved.

6. I love water, especially when I'm hot, and will sqeeze myself into the drink bucket at the dog park if nothing else is available.

7. I will pester my sister Tully unmercifully using tactics like clubbing her with toys, jumping on top of her, rolling into her and smacking her with my paws, grabbing her leg in my mouth until she submits to my will and chases me around the living room!

I am tagging:
Jack
Daisy
Cujo
Cricket
Piper the Wonder Dog
Hannah
Benny

Have fun!

On a Roll...again

Whaahooo!

It has been ages since I had a roll worth mentioning. Finally, on a walk this weekend, I discovered a perfectly lovely dead snake and got in a shoulder roll and a back rub before the dad caught up with me. Tully was a little slow on the uptake and missed out entirely. Ha!

I can't wait to find all the other enticingly stinky and rollable organic (preferably decaying) matter in store for me this spring and summer.
It's all the amazing natural cycle of life: live, die, roll.

You appreciate nature your way and I'll do it mine.

Advisory warning: not for the weak of stomach!

Oh dog, was I sick on Wednesday!

The day started out just fine with an excellent walk and playtime with my sister and big retriever boyfriend. We ate a delicious breakfast and played some more. Then when mom when upstairs to get ready for work I emptied the contents of my tummy on the floor, (ahem) carpet, several times. Mom thinks I must have eaten toxic poop on the walk which must have ignited my food and caused it to come hurling out. But she has no conclusive proof other than the stink and copious brown piles of tummy contents she encountered upon coming downstairs.

But barf hell had not really even begun. I neglected to tell her that while she was upstairs, Tully had taken it upon herself to clean up a bit and eaten what I had just deposited. Before she had even finished cleaning up my efforts, Tully began the second round of redecorating the living room with now recycled barf.

Just when mom thought it could not get any worse, it did!! We barfed and barfed and barfed some more. I don't know about Tully, but I was feeling mighty puny. Mom couldn't get mad at us, but I think she did have some kind of break down. If I wasn't feeling so bad I might have felt sorry for her.

Anyway, I'm recovered and raring to go today!

Now, where's that poop?

Grass addiction...

...is a serious problem...for my mom.

I admit I am a treataholic;
and I am a stinkaholic (thank you Cricket);
But a grassaholic?

Especially since this d-i-e-t thing has been inflicted on me, I have supplimented my nutritional intake with grazing. I have no problem with it whatsoever.
I crave grass, I eat grass, I poop grass.
No problem.

Now mom, on the other hand, doesn't seem to like it that I ring my bathroom bell just to go outside to eat grass.
She doesn't like it when I browse around like a little furry cow looking for just the right blade selection.
She doesn't like it when she tells me to "leave it" and has to come toward me before I grab one more mouthful and reluctantly pull myself away.
She doesn't like it when she has to check my backside for poopgrass cling-ons.

I must admit, that she doesn't like it kind of makes the whole thing more enjoyable!

Diet is a 4-letter word

I have been deemed "overweight" after my last visit to the evil vet.
How much you ask...What do I look like I'm being paid by Jenny Craig to share that priviledged information with you? Never expect a girl to divulge her weight!

So, I have been switched to different food for my new d-i-e-t (bleh). To show my displeasure with the whole mess, I'm on a hunger strike, except for treats of course and what I can steal from Tully :oP

But dog cannot live by treat scraps alone and now I'm starving! Even my powerful do-my-bidding stare is failing to get me anything more than my prescribed rations.

I am not happy right now!

I'm just big-boned!

Here is how it is: My sister is this scrawny little thing (too skinny if you want to know the truth) but, in comparison, I am looking somewhat...ample. I am quite active and athletic but I do love my treats.

Unfortunately, I have also found that Tully is a little slow on treat aquisition and consumption, so I have taken full advantage of her delay to, well, basically steal some of her treats after I've inhaled my own. I'm not proud of this, but I just can't seem to help myself.

Okay, I'm a thief and a pig...maybe I do have a problem. If I keep this up it won't be long before I am waddling around.

This is beginning to concern my folks, who seem to think that something needs to be done about this. Maybe I'll need rehab...

Nah! I don't have a problem, THEY have the problem. Yeah, that's it.

Hey, are you going to eat that?

Where is Tully?

My sister is just starting to get more fun, occasionally picking the toys to shake them and running around with me. My tactics of beating her over the head with squeeky toys and rolling on my back in her face have begun to work on her. Subtle I'm not.

So, I was getting used to having that little furball around, even though she's a total love hog, and now she's not here! Mom left with her this morning mumbling something about having to spay her before she is in heat.

What the heck does that mean?! I'm the one that lays in front of the heater...I'm hot all the time! I was so sad this morning that I didn't even eat my breakfast.

I hope Tully comes back soon.

*sigh*

Welcome home Tully!

I have a sister!!
Her name is Tully and she came to live with us about a week ago. Just between you and me, she is a little weird, but she's kind of growing on me.

She apparently missed Dog Knowledge 101, cause she doesn't know about a lot of things. Like, today she went poop in the house. That is a no-no. I hope she learns that rule soon cause the more time mom spends cleaning up, the less time there is for lovin' on us.

Also, at first she didn't know how to play. I think she thought I was going to be mean. I really just want for us to chase and play. I've had to practically beg her to PLAY WITH ME! She's coming around though and now we have zoomed around and even started to kiss each other.
Hey, it's a sisterly thing!

Welcome home Tully!

I say odor, you say odious

odor: a sensation, stimulation, or perception of the sense of smell...a strong, pervasive quality
odious: arousing or meriting strong dislike, aversion, or intense displeasure

Dear mom,
I am a dog. This may seem self evident however, it is clear that after this weekend you persist in trying to imagine that I should have an aversion to strong smells, just because you do. What you find repulsive, I find irresistable!

I appeal to your sense of empathy. Imagine if someone told you that you should no longer have chocolate and in fact, if you smelled chocolate you should walk in the other direction! Now imagine that you smell the most amazing chocolate you have ever sniffed! It is calling your name! It could be the most blissful experience of your life! Will you choose that or a pat on the head for being a good girl? hmmmmm...

just something to think about.
love, Scout

p.s. I will never disclose the source of the "odious" mystery smell...it is my blissful secret!

Ho Ho Home Again

Whew, It's good to be back home!

Mom and I went to grandmom's house for Christmas.
I thought I might be getting a cat for a present!, but that was just turned out to be the kitty that lives there. I was kind of excited for awhile, but that cat really did not want to play with me or let me chase it, so I don't think cats are very fun. (I still want to chase them!)

So I got lots of cool toys and delicious treats but when it was time to drive home, we got stuck by the weather, snow, freezing rain, high winds for 2 days! Mom didn't like it so much, but I kinda enjoyed the extra attention, walks and playing down by the river. No rolling, but you can't have everything...where would you put it?

I was a little bit of a bad girl at the dog park we stopped at on the way home. Some lady brought 2 little, little, little barky, yappy dogs to the park and boy did they have attitude! I tried to play nice, but, well, it just got to me and before you knew it I had one pinned down to show 'em I'm not going to take s**t from them or anybody else (unless they are bigger than me!) That didn't work out so well, cause mom made me leave the park just as all the fun dogs showed up. Consolation: mom and I did get to play in the snow later. FUN!

Since we got back I have heard my mom and dad talking that one of my litter sisters might need a new home. She has been a show dog and now her owner can't keep her so the breeder asked if we were interested in getting her. I think she deserves a chance to be a loved family member, so I am trying to quietly influence the decision by being very good and cute. Wish me luck.

I'll keep you posted.

Naughty parents!

This is just wrong!!

The day started great. Out with my folks, running, catching, jumping, chasing... happiness! And just after I have had about as much fun as a dog is allowed to have, I am snatched up and deposited in the sink AGAIN to remove what my dad called "serious stank." And get this...I hadn't even rolled in anything!! I thought I was being cooperative and that didn't even work to avoid the dreaded B-word.

Okay, so maybe there was an inordinate amount of deer poop and other savories in this particular field and maybe I did kick up enough to carry home with me. It didn't bother me! Did anyone bother to check and see what I wanted?! They want serious...I am going to seriously roll the next stinky chance I get, so at least I can say I earned it and keep some of my dignity!

I can't stay mad at them though. Even when they are naughty I love them. Just don't subject me to your obsessive cleanliness program!

Hot Dog!

Winter is rolling in and, you know me, I can't wait to roll in winter! As I seem to have an uncanny knack for finding stinky stuff I doubt a little snow would stop me. I can't wait to put my sniffer and stealth rolling skills to the test.

In the meantime I have been accused of "smelling like a dog" and given a b-a-t-h. I AM A DOG!! Just when I am beginning to smell robust and complex, I am stripped down to bare odorlessness. Even running around rubbing myself on the carpet does not restore the natural order. I love my people, but what is with the obsessive complusive cleanliness thing?! Have you no decency (hu)man?

On a more happy note, I have discovered another blissful activity that involves laying in front of the floor heater until I am panting from being such a hot dog. I find it quite intoxicating.

Excuse me while I go bake myself.

Let's Roll!

I've had stellar opportunities to indulge my passion for rolling lately. It's been a particularly busy couple of weeks with lots of good walks and hiking.

The rolling highlights include a dead bird (a little too dry to be optimal, but still enjoyable) and a small puddle of unidentifiable slimy stuff. That was unquestionably the peak of my still developing talent. That one got the best reaction from my folks too, but they interrupted it before I got into a full body roll. They also washed it off before it was really able to dry into a nice piquant crust.
Party poopers.

They try to convince me that my hobby is "bad" and, sure, I'll go along and look like I'm sorry...
BUT I'M NOT!!

It's my birthday and I'll fart if I want to!

I JUST TURNED TWO YEARS OLD!!
(well, actually on November 12th)

Mom says that means I'm technically a teenager. Which could also mean trouble! For instance, I think she's catching on to my strategy of letting a big stinky go in the car so I can get the window down...hehehe.
I don't know what gave me away, but I'll have to figure out a new plan.

I have been so busy! I can really barely type this since I am soooo tired from all the activity of late. My folks and I have been on the road having fun, fun, fun. We went to visit friends, played with my lab pal, Hazel, and hiked around new places, like Minto-Brown Island Park outside Salem, OR.
The end result is that I am now practically comatose from so much fun.

I also got lots of good stuff and TREATS for my birthday! I like this birthday thing. I don't think it's quite fair that people get to have a birthday for each year of theirs and we only get one birthday for every seven dog years!! Who came up with that idea?!? I'll tell you...a cheap human!!

But now I gotta go sleep and so I can have more funnnnzzzzzzzzzzzzzsnortzzzzzzzzzz...

Dog Philosophy

My pals Sydney and Suzee sent this to me and made me smile:o)

Dog Philosophy

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his
tongue. Anonymous

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are
wonderful. Ann Landers

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
Will Rogers

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.
Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
Josh Billings

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
Andy Rooney

We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare.
And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.
M. Acklam

Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people,
who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.
Sigmund Freud

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
Rita Rudner

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times
before lying down.
Robert Benchley

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.
Franklin P. Jones

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have
known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.
James Thurber

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.
Unknown

Ever consider what our dogs must think of us?
I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul,
chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on
earth!
Anne Tyler

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you;
that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
Mark Twain

You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look
that says,
'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'
Dave Barry

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
Roger Caras

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket
and then give him only two of them.
Phil Pastoret

My goal in life is to be as good a person as my dog already thinks I am .
Unknown

Make that a FISH ROLL please!

I have persevered and claim victory over authority and repression!

While on an awesome hike this last weekend I was able to sniff out a veritable jackpot of grossness. Before mom knew it I was on the ground and rolling in some stinky, smelly dead fish remains! Ha! It was the most excellent fish roll I think I have ever had.

The only down side was the b-a-t-h that followed. Authority seems to have the ultimate upper hand. But when the opportunity presents, I WILL roll again. :o)

Later Dogs,
Scout

Sniff, Pee, Eat, Roll or Play

I guess I have been too busy to update my antics, but there have been plenty of them, believe me.

Mom had guests from out of town and I did my best to charm them and will-them-to-do-my-bidding by giving me some of their food! Excellent! I got to taste things I never even knew existed! Those people have really been holding out on me.

I had a blast going on walks and to the dog park. As all doggies know, there are 5 possible responses to things you encounter on your walk: sniff it, pee on it, eat it, roll in it or play with it. I got to do all of that except roll in something. Even though I tried twice, I was THWARTED! I got soooooo close to being able to roll on a dead deer. Mom grabbed me just as I was contemplating which shoulder to start with and anticipating the nirvana of the experience.

One day, Mom came back from one of her little outings with something she told me was a TREAT. Bring it on mom! Then she gave me a piece of I don't know what that I tried to eat, but kept chewing and spitting out. Finally, I decided the only proper response to it was to try and roll in it. Mom said - Well that's not a good sign- but I think it is a compliment of the highest order.

I don't know what her hang up is, but she is stifling my full canine potential. I think I might need therapy if she keeps this up.

RRRRip and Sew

I had a great weekend!! I got to go to the dog park, the beach, play frisbee, swim in the river, chase deer and generally run around with my folks. It's a dogs life!

I particularly enjoy running around with my toys and trying to entice someone to chase me. It doesn't always work, but I have methods to wear down even the most stick in the mud human.
First I try to look particularly cute and irresistable. That works a lot.
Then I try to toss around the toy and throw myself on my back so that it's underneath me and roll and growl like it's trying to get away.
Then I'll push it under the couch and try to dig it out.
If that hasn't worked and if I haven't already destroyed the squeeker (which is one of my missions in life) I will find it and in quick and endless succession:
squeek
squeek
squeek
squeek
squeek
squeek
squeek
sq ueek
squeek
squeek.......

Then I give up and resort to chewing holes in the toy that let me down! RRRRip...That catches mom's attention and even though she tells me not to eat my toys, she doesn't understand that it's the only suitable response for the toys failure to produce a good chase. Besides, it's soooo satisfying.

That's when the toy gets taken to triage and rehab. Sometimes it returns, sometimes not. Such is life. But I think mom and I make a good team...I rip & she sews. Works for me!

Matters of pup ponderation...

Just some random musings:

People always think I'm a boy cause of my name and general scruffy, yet apparently adorable, appearance and rowdy behavior, but I'm secure in my grrrrlness...

It is perfectly acceptable to ring my bell in order to summon my people to do my bidding. Why they think it should just be to announce a bathroom break is sooo limiting...

Speaking of elimination, I have mastered the tripod approach of squatting by lifting my left leg ever so slightly to hover delicately off the ground . If I need to pee on something higher (I find piles of grass and leaves irresistable), then my leg goes up too...

Knowing it's time to go out on a walk is cause for extreme excitement and uncontrollable involuntary movement including rolling around, sitting up, laying down, running away, fanging and high pitched squeeking...

ABC gum is like finding a little savory treasure... a stolen moment of forbidden delictability made all the more delicious by the elicit nature of the encounter...until I get in trouble...

Sniffing, snorting and making "mmmpft" sounds enhance the quality of any smelling experience. The stinkier the better...

Rolling in gross stuff is a celebration of life!!
:oD

lonely dog

My mom was gone all weekend. I didn't want to eat and I spent a lot of time staring out the window waiting for her car to drive up. Dad does his best, but it's just not the same. How do they expect me to be a happy dog when the object of my affection (and the liberal dispenser of treats) is away?

*sigh*

Then when she finally came home and she had the smell of another dog on her clothes!!!! She tried to explain it by saying her friend was sick and she went to help her. Can she help it if her friend has a dog? She missed me as much as I missed her and of course I forgave her.

I had to throughly lick her face to reestablish my dogly supremacy.
All is good with the world again.

Eye drops s**k!

So we went to That Place the other day where there are all kinds of dog smells, but no one to play with. They put me on a metal table to poke and prod me, in some VERY delicate places I might add. Even getting a treat barely makes up for the indignities!!

Just when I thought I was home free, my mom and dad are giving me eye drops 3x a day for 7 days!!! This is not good my furiends! They want me to think it's as hard on them as me, but I'm not buying it. I think I have managed to get more drops on my fur than in my eyes...I will thwart the evil drops!

Later, I have to go hide now...

I Love Dog Parks!

This weekend was awesome! Mom and I went on a visit to see my grandma person and auntie person. It's a bummer to be in the crate for the drive (Mom says it's for safety...bleh! I say it's no fun!) But we stopped at a new (for me) dog park in Ashland on the way down and a great dog park in Redding on the way back.

Woof, woof, woof ,woof,woof...who let the dogs out! I got to sniff butts, jump in water, run around, play with pups, look cute...Party Time!

I usually use the lay on my back technique to let doggies know I'm nice and they're in charge, then we can almost always play nice. But some of them just go too far and then I have to put my paw down. At the first park I was minding my own business, having fun getting to know everyone when some little horny dog began accosting me and I didn't like that too much. I put up with him for awhile, but then I told him NO! Boy, that makes the people run to break it up! I would never hurt anyone, but a girl has to protect herself. Why couldn't he just behave himself like everyone else? His person took him out when he couldn't behave. Too bad for him! I still had fun!

There was LOTS of nice dogs at the other park. I like to say hello to everyone, even the dogs that are far away. One big dog tried to herd me, but I had fun running away from him. When he tried to leave me alone, I would run back and make him play with me again. When I get hot I jump into the water bucket. Ha, other pups may want to drink, but they have to wait until I cool off!

I hope my mom takes me to lots more parks, even though I don't mind her when she says we have to leave. I can't help it, I love to play with dogs!!

STOP THAT SOUND!

I consider myself a pretty tough girl, most of the time. I can play with all kinds of dogs and rough house with my parents and not much fazes me. Until...
My dad made some horrible sound, like mmmooooo, that just sent me into a tail spin. I freaked! It was like my body was possessed. I couldn't run, I couldn't stay still, I finally ran to my mom and hid between her feet. She would protect me from the awfulness of that noise!! Also, I wanted nothing more to do with dad! Make him go away! My mom wasn't sure what was going on but she said I would be okay. She said I had never had a run in with a cow, whatever that is! (I really liked the horses we visited once though, they were quiet.)
I'm not sure what happened, maybe it was just a bad dream! I felt better later, but...WHAT WAS THAT? AND NEVER DO IT AGAIN!!

Cowabunga!

Yesterday Mom and Dad took me to a great place for us to hike and swim!! I got to run in front and they got to pack in my all important treats. I don't like to let them get too far behind though (they are soooo slow!) If I don't see them I'll wait and if they don't show up soon, I'll go back and look for them. Sometimes they try to hide, but it takes a top dog to outsmart me!

Swimming was fun and I'm getting better at it. Water feels so good for a hot and dusty hiker! I like to paddle around and drink it too. Mom threw out a stick for me to get, not too far though. I'd bring it back, but I got so excited about being a GOOD GIRL!! that I would drop it in the water before I got completely out. We had so much fun and being with Mom and Dad is the best.

Did I already say I love the water!? Even little mudholes that gross my Mom out! How's a little dirt going to hurt anything!? If I'm hot enough, I'm going in...Cowabunga!

Hanging out with Dad

Yesterday Dad had the day off and we hung out together. He was supposed to TAKE ME ON A WALK but I guess he had other things to do, like eat and sleep. The worst part is when he refuses to give me anything he is eating! I'd like to pee on the guy that came up with don't give dogs people food.

So when Mom comes home (I must lick her face!!) and thinks he is shirking his doggydad responsbilities he tries to defend himself by saying "Well I got her for us" and then Mom goes "but who has kept her alive since?" Then they laugh so it's all good. It's the best when Mom and Dad are home with ME. That's where they belong.

My boyfriend's back!

I got to go the the track today with my boyfriend Danner. Our Mom's take us there to run around and play sometimes. I didn't get to see him for awhile when his Mom was having a baby..the hairless kind not a fun puppy.
He's a big, hairy retriever and I adore him! I'll jump on him if he tries to kiss me though. None of that smoochy stuff for me! I can run faster, but he has figured out how to grab on to my collar and flip me over to pin me down. I don't know about you, but that makes me crazy!! At first I act all nonchalant about it, like oh yeah, not a big deal, but when I get up, watch out!! I will kick his butt!
*sigh* I just love him.

Whew!

My lost puppy friend was found and is back home. What a relief. Mom was hoping I would get another chance to play with her, but I guess her family is moving away. Doggone!

Look what the Mom dragged home

I had a puppy come and visit me! I was at my usual spot surveying the road from my window seat when Mom came up the sidewalk with a little furball in her arms. At first I thought, "what the..." Mom told Dad that she had found her in the street!! With no collar!! And no parents!! I know that NOBODY should be in the street anyway. Mom didn't know where she lived so she went around looking to see if someone knew her. She finally found where she lived but no one was home so she brought her back to stay with us until her family came home.
Mom was holding her and she was tired and scared. I was so beside myself...put her down, put her down!! Let me help! She needs someone to play with!
She was just a little puppy and she had a real flat face. Mom said she was so ugly she was cute. (But not cuter that me.) We liked each other right away and wriggled and ran and jumped around together for hours. I can run faster, but because she's a puppy I let her kind of boss me around and jump on me and nibble my chin. Mom and Dad kept laughing at us saying "you are such crazy little girls." We finally wore out and started sleeping, then Mom had to take her home. *sigh*

Then the next day we found out she got out again! How come her parents aren't looking after her better! We went out looking for her and didn't find her. I hope my new girlfriend is going to be okay and some one nice found her and makes sure she is safe.

New to this diary stuff

Okay, it's not MY idea to tell you about myself, but it's hard to resist Mom's payoff of TREATS. She thinks she's training me, but I think I've got things pretty well under control. Dad is not such a push over. He always says, "and you thought a female dog would like me better!" I admit, I'm a Momma's girl, but she has TREATS for dog's sake!
I think I've had a pretty happy puppyhood so far. My parents named me Scout before they even got me cause they had wanted a border terrier for so long. The name is from the spunky little girl in To Kill a Mockingbird, but it also fits because I like be in front checking things out. The breeder picked me out for them, but I think when I rolled on my back and showed them my tummy they couldn't help but think it was meant to be. I still do that when I think it will help me out of a fix. My other strategies are to lick faces, give them the do-my-bidding stare and look irresistably adorable.
I love it when they take me out and we do fun things. I LOVE other dogs and am ready to play at any time. The dog park is one of my favorite places. I also like to go on hikes and on the beach. I may be small, but there isn't anything I can't do!