September 16th 2007 2:58 pm
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Guess what?!?! I got to go to my Mom's family reunion this weekend at Cave Run Lake in KY. All the rest of em had to be boarded. Mom and Dad let me go cause I'm the best behaved and I like all people and all children. Course I did have to let the other doggies that came know that I am Alpha by growling and snarling at them.. But Mom wouldn't let me get close enough to them to show them physicallybut I think they got the hint. I had sooo much fun. I got to stay in a hotel. I had my very own bed. We went on some long walks by the lake and I got hamburgers and hotdogs. And best of all.. I got Mom and Dad all to myself!!! It was the best weekend ever..
November 4th 2006 3:30 pm
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Humans shall make no law abridging the freedom to bark, bay, or howl anywhere, anytime, and for any reason, real or imagined; or growl if moved or awakened from any chosen spot.
Squirting with hoses, water pistols, screaming, or physical intervention is strictly prohibited.
When Beagles bark, humans must listen until they understand and then perform accordingly.
The right to claim any spot on the bed first, not having to move for humans or siblings; covers and pillows will remain untouched until we vacate said spot.
Good sun spots must be made available throughout every house and curtains that block access are open season.
The unlimited right to enter and exit the back door with human assistance, performed with no grumbling under the breath.
The right to at least one walk per day anywhere, anytime we want, including mud, water hazards, garbage dumps, rolling on dead animals, insects or any other unidentified smelly goo; with no censorship of items or creatures procured to eat.
No muzzles, masks, or other contraptions will be applied to abridge desire to forage.
Sniffing will have no limits as to time or object. Yanking or pulling on the leash is prohibited, as is screaming or physical intervention.
Eating anything is an inalienable right and humans shall make no rules regarding it, including but not limited to: the cat box, sibling's treats or dinners, garbage can exploration, or countertop sweeping.
All packages must be inspected upon entrance to the house.
An adequate space either at or directly under the table must be provided at meal times.
Any food dropped on the floor must be pointed to and is immediately property of the Beagle eliminating any five second rule of humans, and if said Beagle is absent the item must remain untouched until his arrival whether from the next room or outside.
No Beagle is responsible for clean up of any residual dog spit.
Treats will be distributed upon human departure and arrival.
Vegetables from the garden whether on the plant or in a container, especially green beans, are property of the Beagle.
Obesity or its description will be eliminated from any handbooks, manuals, leaflets, or other propaganda upon entering the house and the Beagle will determine what weight is proper for their frame.
Beagles will be secure in their possessions against any search either by humans or siblings.
No seizure of Beagle property is allowed and in the event of exchange for
another item of higher value, both items become property of the Beagle.
In counter- point, Beagles have the right to search and seize at their whim; any pocket, purse, bag, toy box, dishwasher door, countertop, or child.
Chewing feet, scratching ears, rolling on the back and biting of genitals will be permitted and the only resolution will be rubbing of the belly by the human.
Under no circumstances shall any Beagle or canine brother or sister be used for human medical experiment. If caught, humans will undergo said experiment every day for the rest of their lives.
Unusual human behavior, such as harmonica playing, phone talking, lawn mowing, leaf raking, bed-thrashing, etc. will be met with unlimited barking until said activity ceases.
No Beagle will be left behind!
September 19th 2006 4:49 pm
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I am officially a member of the Reynolds family!!!! I have my furever home!! I am sooooo happy.. except for one little thing... I don't like having to be inside the fence all the time. I'm not allowed to roam around. Although theres 2+ acres out there, I liked running around the neighborhood getting into stuff.
My new Mommy said that she is going to take me to PetSmart to go shopping pretty soon. Now I don't know what shopping is nor do I know about Petsmart but I do know I like riding in the car. Its lots of fun. But she says I have to wait till after I get fixed. I didn't even know I was broken!!! She must be confused.
Anyway... I have a home!