return to top

The Tao of Sunny

Detente

I have studied, I meditated, I have matured. I am an educated dog, a sensitive dog, and I have attained Understanding. I have done what many thought was impossible: I have learned to Behave Myself around Cows.

I am one with the Cow. No, that's silly, of course I'm not one with the Cow. But I'm not a slobbering idiot with the Cow either. I am Calm. I am Thoughtful. I am in control of my Emotions. I no longer have to be restrained and distracted. I walk by the Cows off leash, under my own power, guided by my own conscience.

I do not chase the Cows. I do not bark. I merely watch them, and drink in their scent. I have acquired a rudimentray knowledge of the Bovine language, and sometimes I converse with the Cows.

I say, "Hello, Bos taurus, I see by your red body and white face that you are a Hereford."

The cows reply, "Moooooo. Yoooooo are a Dog. Dogs chase. Dogs bark."

"It is true that I am a dog. But I do not chase Cows, nor do I bark at them. Be at peace, my friends, I mean you no harm."

"Moooooo. Doooooo not chase us. We are big, we are heavy, we have pointy parts."

"I will not chase you, good Cattle. You have my word on that. However, some day you will be slaughtered, and your parts will be placed on little styrofoam trays and wrapped in plastic and labeled and put on display at the Supermarket. Them my mom will go to the Supermarket and buy your neck bones, and she will bring them home for me and I will eat all the meat and chew on your bones and it will be good."

The Cows are not offended by this. They are simple creatures, who understand their place in the universe.

"Moooooo," They say, "You are not chasing us. We will ignore you and chew our cuds now."

I'm not sure why I was once so in awe of them

Walking

This afternoon I went walking with my mom. We climbed up the hill to a pretty street where all the houses had gardens and all the gardens were overflowing with bright bloomy flowers. We passed a house with a sign that said Very Spoiled Dachshunds Live Here, which made my mom smile. I peed on a bush, and that made me smile.

Then we went down the hill, and some of the houses weren't so pretty. There was a Malamute on a chain in a yard who kept jumping and asking if I would play with him. I thought of my friend Mingus, and I was sad.

There were lots of other dogs in yards who all talked about me as I went by. Some of them got very excited, and some of them screamed and practically fainted! I guess they were jealous of my red fuzziness, or maybe some of them are in love with me. All I know is, everytime I got for a walk, it's a pretty big event for the neighborhood dogs.

Some people think that keeping their dogs in the yard is okay, but really it's a pretty sad life for those dogs. No wonder they're jealous of me.

I got it!

I figured out the weave poles! It's easy, you just go in and out and in and out and out- wait, no, it's in and out and in and in- D'oh!

Okay, deep breath. In and out and in and out and in and out. That's it! Whew, heavy stuff!

I talked to some very smart dogs at the agility trial, and they said that I got it wrong. Thinking too much doesn't turn your brain to oatmeal, it's not thinking that turns your brain to oatmeal. Boy, that's a relief. I was worried that learning the weave poles was going to use up all my brains, and that I wouldn't have anything left for kongs and dog doors.

I can't wait until I'm ready to compete. Going to trials with Bella and staying in my crate all day is boring. I want my turn!