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11 years, my dear boy....

May 24th 2011 11:03 am
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My beloved son, Kody,

You are our golden angel, watching over us.
When we lost you, I felt life was ending.
I felt life had no meaning, and was asking “what is the point?” Then I realized you were the point.
We had YOU.

You were our biggest boy. The one that everyone noticed.
So gorgeous and glorious. The smile and glow.
You had a halo long before you went to heaven.

We look forward to seeing you and your furblings again.
Your Daddy & I will do our best to be deserving of going to that place when it is our time.

We love you, baby. Always.

Mom & Dad,
Mickey & Jenny
Wally, Sara & Baby Cat
May 24, 2011

 

10 years.....

May 24th 2010 7:57 am
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My beloved son, Kody,

This marks your 10th year of being at the bridge without us. It’s hard to fathom that it’s been that long. We never forget you. I only wish we had more time like we did in the end. Special time; time that you shared with your Daddy & Mommy alone.
You continue to guide us in your golden ways. Spirit free from strife and open to new experiences.
I will always remember your sounds and smells. I still miss they way you would stand over us if we laid on our backs. Your face hovering over us, breathing into our noses, saying, “Please, pet me. Love me”. We did, my golden boy. We always will.

Please continue to watch over your family and be with Grizzly, Sammy, Bernie, and Astro. We will be there soon.

I never knew that love lost can hurt for so long.

We remain proud of you, today and forever.

Mom & Dad,
Mickey & Jenny
Wally, Sara & Baby Cat
May 24, 2010

When I released these balloons, for the first time in ALL the balloons we have released, they went straight up. I mean STRAIGHT up! I watched for several minutes then noticed a strange cloud that was a pinkish color. It was made of thin stuff. It was swirling around. The sky was one of those spring skies that has poofy clouds here and there with beautiful blue. To see this swirling cloud was VERY strange. As we watched for about 10 minutes, it never moved but changed shape. It was like watching a tornado directly over us. It was a dust devil, but it was up in the air, caught there somehow. We think it was a sign from Kody. Why weren't the balloons drawn into it? There must have been no other wind or the balloons would not have gone straight up. Very unusual. Kody has always been one to make sure he sends me signs.

I love you, Kody. I know you are still near.

 

Happy birthday, my son

May 13th 2010 10:53 am
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Today would have been your 22nd birthday. I know there was no way you could have lived to be 22, but I still celebrate the day of your birth.

You are the only one we ever KNEW the date of your birth. I thank God you were put in my arms.

I love you, Kody. My golden angel. I always will.

 

9th Anniversary since you left to the Rainbow Bridge

May 22nd 2009 10:00 am
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My beloved son, Kodiak

This year marks 9 years since I last touched your golden paws. How can that be? Can it really be 9 years since I looked into your eyes? Since I smelled your ears? Your pure Golden spirit will be with me always.

Little Jenny reminds me of you, sometimes. Her tail thumps the walls when she’s happy, and when Daddy gets home, she takes his arm in her mouth and tries to walk away with him, just like you did. It makes us smile to remember those wonderful days.

You are certainly no longer alone, my love. There are 5 of you waiting for us at the Bridge. Five. How can that be?

Little Bernadette must be beside herself to see you and play with you. From the time we adopted her, we told her all about you. We were always so proud of our golden boy.

You know our hearts are healing from losing you, but we will never forget you.

Kodiak, our Koko puff…. We love you.

Mom & Dad,
Mickey & Jenny
Wally, Sara & Baby Cat

 

Happy Birthday, my golden angel

May 13th 2009 1:21 pm
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Twenty-one years ago, today, you were born. What a blessed day that was.

Happy Birthday, Kody.

I love you, baby.

 

8 Year Anniversary of your final journey

May 23rd 2008 8:16 am
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*to be airmailed tomorrow morning, tied to the strings of 6 balloons of various colors, *

Dearest Kody,

Tomorrow is your final journey anniversary. Can it really be 8 years since I touched your fur? Since I kissed your paws? 8 years since I smelled your breath? Time passes, and I don’t know where it went.

Thank you for helping Sammy when he joined you at the bridge. I know you were probably one of the first to greet him, weren’t you?

I miss you so much. Ginger was here for a while, and she reminded us so much of you. Your thumping tail, your panting sounds, and your silly grumpy/play growls.

Please, continue to watch over your family. I know you did the best you could to protect us all. The light of your love will always surround us.

We have gone to the ocean more lately. The smell of it, and just the trip there reminds me of you and how you used to get happy just going over the hill and seeing the eucalyptus trees.
Such a smart boy.

May we meet again, in our time, at the Rainbow Bridge.

Love,
Mommy, Daddy, Mickey, Bernadette
Baby Cat, Sara, and Wally

 

Son of mine...

May 12th 2008 12:57 pm
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Sweet Kokopuff,

Your birthday is tomorrow, and you would have been 20!

I will celebrate your life and not my loss, because I love you. How can I be sad that I was blessed to have you in my life? I would not ever change a thing.

Tonight, Auntie Alison is bringing Ginger over, and you know how much she reminds me of you.

I love you Kody. Forever.....

 

Numbers...

November 18th 2007 5:44 pm
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I found the paperwork on his last days... I have the numbers. I don't know what they mean, but it looked bad...


On April 24, we took him in for a broken tooth... but it wasn't that. We still don't know what it was. It could have been a bee sting?

They did preop bloodwork.

On May 6, BUN was 113.6 and Creat was 3.52

May 8, BUN 95 and Creat was 2.20, Ca (calcium, I assume?) was 13.02

May 11, BUN 53, Crat 1.86, Ca 12.49

May 15 BUN 28.8, Cre 1.93, Ca 11.83, Alb 2.97

When we took him in, they did what they could.


It was fairly quick... and they never said he was dying, they said it was serious, though. They said he was in the early stages of nephritic (sp?) disease.
Until the night we took him in at 2 am.. we didn't know. Even then, they never said. His glucos was 25.9., they worked on him for a while (I was with him the entire time) and got his Alb down to 1.63,
TP (?)down to 4.39,
AlkP 1562
Alt was off the scale
BUN was 50.0
Creat 3.96
Glucos (10% dextrose) was 538.1....

The results we got from UC Davis, were he died, his BUN was 61 at that time, and his ALT was 1134. Creat was 3.9, AST was 583

I don't know what any of that means, but if it makes sense to you...????

I just know, until he died in the car, and then of course UC Davis, no one ever told us he was dying. Our regular vet wasn't there that day.

I regret that. I have all his records, and they never wrote that.

He was on Science Diet K/D as soon as we found out.

 

I dreamed of you last night...

August 24th 2007 8:12 am
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My sweet angel,

Thank you for my gift. Last night, I had a dream about you.

We were at Auntie Kristy's house and then we took you to a vet. It looked like a rescue vet, because of all of the outdoor chain link.

For some reason, you got away from us, and they said I would never be able to catch you again, or recognize you as your fur was shaved from your beautiful head and shoulders. Oh, boy were they wrong.

Daddy went running out the door to chase you, but you ran away, tail high in the air, happy with your freedom.

I went through a door and knelt down and called your name. You ran to me, ears flapping, and crashed your face into my legs! Oh, Kody. I was sooooo happy!

I got to rub behind your ears, and kiss your head! Oh, it was so wonderful. Then I woke up. You were still at the Rainbow Bridge.

Baby boy, it has been over 7 years, and I still miss you!

Did I tell you about when Sammy was at the hospital having his leg amputated? While we waited, a gorgeous golden was there to have his vaccinations. He looked so much like you, I had to go say hello. He let me pet him, and made the same sounds you did with the happy pant. I burst into tears and explained to the lady that he reminded me of you... I was sorry I cried into that pup's fur, but I just miss you so much.

I know I will never be able to have another Golden. I would constantly compare it to you, and that wouldn't be fair to the pup.

I love you, sweet angel boy. I always will. Thank you for my gift.

 

7 year anniversary

May 24th 2007 9:17 pm
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Tonight I sent Kody his letter, attached to 6 rainbow colored balloons.

This is what the letter said:
Dearest Kody,

I can’t believe it has been 7 years since you made the trip to the bridge. It feels much longer, but just yesterday at the same time. It is possible I haven’t touched you for that long? Haven’t smelled your toes since then?

You know about what Sammy has been through over the past year. Oh, sweet Kody. I’m so sorry I haven’t been visiting like I was, but I think of you all the time.

We have a new member of the family. A little rotten orange cat named Wally. You would have LOVED him! He would have snuggled you all night long!

I was remembering so many happy, wonderful times we spent with you. Your loving ways, the way you would attract attention everywhere you went. We miss touching your perfect fur, and hearing your enormous bark.

Please continue to watch over Sammy. He needs you so much right now. He is faltering quickly, and at only 10, it is far too soon for him to join you. Please wrap your wings around his fragile body.

I think part of the reason we have such a large family now is because you left such a huge hole in our family.

You were perfect love embodied. No one will ever take your place. How could they? We love you, now and forever.


I sat at his grave listening to Mirah Carey sing "I'll Never Forget You", looking at photos of him. I could barely see the photos from the tears.

I smiled, though, as I watched the balloons dissappear into the brilliant blue sky. I know he is still with me, watching over us.

 
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