Sending love

Dear Sophie,

I'm missing you like crazy. Just wanted to let you know how much I think about you every day. Somedays are especially hard and today is one of those days. 15 years together and it went way too fast. Rest in peace, baby girl. I love you.

love,
Mom

Dear Sophie

Dear Sophie,

It's been 5 months since you made your journey to the bridge. I miss you so much, it's difficult for me to talk about. It's hard for me to look at photos of you. That may get better with time but I'm not so sure; Sally passed away 3 1/2 years ago and I still have a hard time going to her Catster page.

15 years with you and now 5 months without you. I look to your favorite sleeping space often and imagine you there. You were the sweetest girl and I was so blessed to have you with me for so long. Your age kind of snuck up on me and it wasn't until my dad and brother came to town and visited that I realized how difficult everyday things had gotten for you.

I worried for years about what would take you from me and having to say good-bye. It was silly to worry, in the end it was all about you and making sure you were comfortable and happy. When things got too difficult for you, I made the best decisions that I could, always with love and your well-being at the front of my mind, even though it broke my heart.

Thank you for picking me that day in the Humane Society. I will always know that I was in the right place at the right time because you were meant to be my baby girl. We grew up together. I love you and I miss you so much. Please give Sally a big kiss and cuddle from me.

Love you,
Mom

Thoughts and Thank You

So many people told me in recent weeks that I would "just know" when it was time. I worried so much about this because I didn't "know" and at the same time, I knew Sophie was struggling. I could list all the things that she was struggling with and it was so clear that her time here was hard for her and growing more difficult. But she would look at me and smile or kiss me or have a good day or just be sleeping so peacefully, and my heart would say that it can't be time.

I made the appointment to help her cross the bridge two weeks ago. And then I cancelled that appointment and rescheduled it for yesterday, April 23rd. The vet was so kind and told me that I could cancel and reschedule the appointment as many times as I needed to. I wasn't sure that I was going to keep the appointment until April 21st. On that day, Sophie was struggling, despite the 7 pain and arthritis pills she was on daily. I took some time off of work to be with her and it was during that time that I knew I was doing the right thing on behalf of Sophie.

She'd lost interest in so many thing, didn't even want her special bone for more than a minute or two and didn't even want to take a walk. She could no longer wag her tail (which broke my heart). And while she still smiled at me and had a sparkle in her eyes, I could see that she was feeling worse. I didn't think I could do this while she still had a sparkle in her eye but I didn't want to wait until she felt so badly that there was no sparkle at all.

It was the hardest decision. I'm sure I will have a lot of feelings about it in the days and weeks to come. I'm bracing myself for feelings of guilt; right now, it's all about sadness and grief. I didn't realize that I would feel worse today than I did yesterday but I do. Overwhelming sadness.

There are so many things and so many memories that I want to write about (and I'm sure I will at some point) but right now I'm just so sad and a little stuck in the current moment and the moments of yesterday. It was so hard. She went peacefully but it was so, so hard.

The kitties are grieving, too. Leo slept on Sophie's bed last night. He's a little nervous about my crying and has been peering at me with wide eyes. Lucy, who was so very close to Sophie, slept all day yesterday. She finally came downstairs late last night and ate some food and purred while I loved on her. And feisty Charlie has been the most expressive and vocal in his confusion about Sophs. Last night he sat in Sophie's favorite spot and howled. Poor babies, she was a big part of all their lives. She loved her kitties and they loved her.

Thank you all for the support, kind and thoughtful words, and rosettes and gifts on Sophie's page. I've read each one and they mean the world to me. Sophie was a very special girl and I was so very blessed to have her in my life for the last 15 years.

Take care,
Molly

Rest in Peace, Sophie

My sweet baby girl crossed the rainbow bridge today. Her journey was peaceful, in my arms and looking into my eyes. She was the sweetest girl and I can't imagine my life without her. I was so very blessed to have her in my life for the last 15 years.

Rest in peace, baby girl.

Shameless!

This is Sophie's mom with a shameless plug for a contest and request for your vote! Our sweet Sophie will be journeying to the bridge within the next two weeks. Her appointment is April 23rd but if she needs to go sooner, that date could change. She's the sweetest dog and I've been blessed to have her with me for 15 years. I adopted her from the Humane Society when she was 1 and I was a 19 year old college student. She is my constant companion. She is my heart.

If you are on Facebook, I need your help! Sophie is entered into a photo contest for Senior Dogs. The winner gets a portrait of their dog and I'm sure you can guess how much I would love that! The competition is stiff and some of the other dogs have their own profiles with thousands of friends. It's going to be an uphill battle for Sophie to have a chance (and it's okay if she doesn't win :). We could definitely use the support of the Dogster and Catster community!

Please help me with a chance at winning the painting of Sophie! To vote, go to Daily Digg and "like" the page (it's a cute page with photo contests for dogs!).

After you've liked the page, please go to Sophie's photo entry and click "like" under her photo and then leave a comment. Each "like" under her photo is a vote and each comment is a vote so each person can vote twice!

Thank you! Thank you!

Update: Sophie is currently tied for first place! Thanks to those who have voted! If you haven't voted, please vote for Sophie. The contest runs through April 19th. And if you don't have FB, don't worry- your support and Sophie-love is more than enough, even without voting.

Sophie Update

From Sophie's Mom:

Sophie did well with the anesthesia and the dental. Once they cleaned her teeth, they decided that she didn't need any extractions! As an elderly dog, she has elderly teeth that are stained and quite worn down, but they aren't diseased, just old. She also had a growth removed near her eye. That doesn't look so great tonight but will hopefully look better in the morning.

Unfortunately, Sophie's bloodwork continues to look bad. She had bloodwork done in November and then again today. In less than 3 months, her kidney levels and liver levels have skyrocketed. I'll be calling the vet in the morning to discuss changing Sophie's arthritis medication dosage to be easier on her liver. Sophie's calcium levels are also very, very high (as they have been for 2 1/2 years). The calcium levels likely indicate cancer; due to Sophie's age, the plan is to keep her comfortable and peaceful throughout the remainder of her life, however long that may be.

She's an amazingly sweet soul. How lucky am I to have had this amazing being in my life for nearly 15 years? Beyond lucky, truly blessed, every moment that she is in my life is a true blessing.

Thanks for the support and kind words- I was worried about her!

Take care,
Molly

Big Day Tomorrow

From Sophie's Mom-

Please keep Sophie in your thoughts tomorrow. After a very difficult decision, the vet and I have decided that Sophie needs to go under anesthesia for a dental and a growth removed near her eye. Due to her elderly age and her kidney problems, it was a very difficult decisiong; however, for her quality of life and to avoid pain in her teeth/mouth, it's important to clean her teeth (and possibly extract some). I'm nervous about her going under, she's my baby. But it's important and the vet feels good about it (we will have lots of pre-anesthesia bloodwork done prior to the anesthesia).

She may need to spend the night at the vet's office, I'll know more tomorrow...

Take care,
Sophie's mom Molly

Senior News

Hi pals,

Hope everydog is doing well! We are enjoying the weather cooling down, it gots hot here in the summers!

I had a v-e-t appointment last week. My kidney numbers are not very good. But I am still doing well, eating and drinking normally. At my age, the blood test resuls are never good so we try not to worry about the numbers and focus on my day to day health instead.

In other news, I have my very own fan page on Facebook! If you or your parent are on FB, I would love to have you join my page: Sophie ~ Sweet Senior Dog Fanpage and celebrate my senior years with me!

love,
Sophie

Dog of the Day!

Wow! What a very special treat to find out that I'm Dog of the Day! The kitties in my family are usually the ones being honored on Catster- this is my very first Dogster honor ever!
Thank you, HQ!

Life is good. I spend most of my time sleeping. I like to be outside with Mommy and I still love to eat! I like to cuddle with my kitty siblings and I love when my kitty sister Lucy grooms my face and ears. I close my eyes and lean into her.

I am no longer able to go upstairs in my house due to my arthritis. That's kind of a bummer because I always liked to sleep on the guest bed and the landing on the stairs. I also can't get in or out of the car on my own- another bummer, I always loved car rides (except if we were headed to the v-e-t!).

In some ways, it's hard getting old. I wish I could still hear and I wish I could see better and I definitely wish that my back legs weren't affected by arthritis. But I'm amazingly healthy for a senior (my vet says geriatric but I prefer senior or golden girl!) and I have lived a good, long life. Mommy and I have been together so long that we can almost read each other's mind. We are completely in-sync (and in love).

When my mom adopted me at the Humane Society, I was about 1 1/2 years old. Mommy was a 19 year old college student. We've been together ever since; we've grown up together.

My life is very peaceful and I am content. Being a golden girl isn't just about being old or having old-age health problems, it's also about love, routine, and the comfort that comes with knowing each other so well, for so long, and with so much love.

Thank you for the Dog of the Day honor! My mommy got a little teary-eyed when she read the email from HQ. Every day with me is a very special day for her and it makes her happy to know that new friends will have a chance to meet me and know me through Dogster today.

Me? It's a great honor and I'm going to love the extra treats and loving I get today AND celebrating with friends and meeting the new friends I've made!

But truthfully, it's time for this golden girl to get back to napping!


love,
Sophie

Things are a little rough

The past month and especially the last week have been hard on me. My arthritis is getting worse and I'm struggling to stand up and to lay down. Mommy has put non-slip rugs all over the house to help me because as pretty as the hardwood floors are, they aren't a friend to a senior dog like me.

I've been walking into walls and furniture and I've started just standing in place, starring at the the walls. Mom's not sure if it's because it's hard for me to lay down or if I'm getting confused and forgetting what I was planning to do.

I had an accident in the house this morning. That's very unusual for me and it has my family concerned. Luckily my mom is working from home this afternoon and can keep a close eye on me. I seem to be doing better this afternoon and I've been drinking my water and eating my food throughout so hopefully it was just a little episode. Any more strange behavior and Mommy says I'll have to go for a v-e-t visit. Paws crossed that I don't have to because it's very stressful on me (I don't like the vet or car rides anymore).

Thanks to my kitty and doggie friends for your purrs and tailwags. Thank you Hilda, Margo, Sunny, Penelope and family, Teddy, and the Cali Crew.

love and paws crossed that tomorrow is a better day,
Sophie