My First Day in Heaven

I am now at the Bridge, and I am happy and healthy and whole again. I sent my Mommy angel kisses from Heaven last night while she was dreaming. She had a very hard night, and she still thinks that she hears me following her when she walks through the house. It's going to be tough on her. She couldn't have made it through this without all of her amazing friends here!

My mom feels the love from everyone and she wants to let everyone know how grateful she is. She is still trying to be strong and fight through the tears. But she is so thankful for all the reassuring p-mails and beautiful rosettes. And thank you to Headquarters for picking me as DOTD yesterday. What a special honor on the day of my passing.

Thank you to everyone who has been so kind. And I'm so excited about all the new Angels I've met! Angel, Brandibear, Cali, Ginger, Kosi, Lucky Lucy, Sir Barkley, The Chicago Crew of Angels, Miracle, Nick and so many other beautiful, amazing Angels have been so kind and helpful to show me around.

If I could tell my mom one thing to make her feel better, I would let her know that here at the Bridge, I can spend ALL DAY eating cookies and chasing the Moo-Cows! :) How great is that! She will be happy to hear that.

-Herbie Joe of the Rainbow Bridge

My Sweet Herbie is now an Angel....

It's with a heavy and broken heart that I have to write these words.... This morning we made the hardest decision of our lives to help our little Herbie along to the Bridge.

Today, November 3, 2008 at 11:30 am, Herbie left this world while we held him in our loving arms. I know that he is in a better place, and he is no longer hurting, but my heart hurts. I miss him so much already...

Coming home to an empty house was so hard! Everywhere I step I keep looking for you, expecting you to be right there behind me. I think that I hear you wanting a drink of water or wanting to go outside. Oh, Herbie, I miss you so much. My heart is broken, Little Man.

I know that you are in Heaven with Grand-dad eating all the cookies you can stuff in your little belly. Tell Grand-dad to take good care of my Sweet Angel. Run and be free and play like the healthy pup that you used to be.... There will never be enough tears to say, "I love you forever and a day, Sweet Boy."

Love,

Mom and family

Sudden Turn for the Worse...Nov. 1

Herbie's mom here--

In something that I can only describe as cruel irony, less than four hours after speaking to Herbie's vet and having him warn me that the effects of him feeling better due to the Prednisone were only "temporary," it seems that Herbie has taken a turn for the worse.

Herbie's breathing has suddenly become very shallow and labored as he lays down--almost as if his lymph nodes are so swollen that they are blocking his airway. I have been laying on the floor with him, and he has been staring directly into my eyes as if to say that he's exhausted, but he can't rest. I just wish he could sleep.......I feel so much better when he's asleep because I feel like he's not hurting.

I don't think that it's time yet, but if he can change this drastically in just a few hours, I guess anything's possible. Gosh, I'm just not ready yet. I don't think I'll ever be ready... Please pray for us that if we do have to make the decision, that we can wait until Monday, so that we can take Herbie to his doctor and not to an emergency clinic. As silly as it sounds, I would find some comfort in knowing that it will be done by the doctor who has known him and lovingly taken care of him for the past several years...

Doing Better...Oct. 31

I have been feeling pretty well this week. My mom opted not to try chemo based on my age and the advanced stage of the cancer at diagnosis---it had already infiltrated my liver, and the vet said that chemo might not be effective based on the advanced stage of disease. She fought hard with the choice, but she hopes she made the right decision.

Anyway, I have been on Prednisilone and two other medications for my tummy since last Friday. I have been eating like a hog, bol, and I drink water ALL the time now. I have to go potty every couple of hours but that's okay as long as I have an appetite! The medication seems to have helped a lot....I have a lot of spunk back in my step, and I am much more alert. However, mom knows these effects aren't longlasting, and she's not sure how long things will stay like this, so it's kind of bittersweet.

Lymphosarcoma

This horrible, horrible disease is destroying my sweet little boy! You are so weak and skinny and tired and frail.

Where did this come from?? Why did this happen to you??

We are not ready to lose you yet. Please hang in there, Herbie! You are so strong, but don't do it for us. We understand when you can't fight any longer. We'll be there for you every step of the way...

Our sweet little Herbie-boy. We are going to enjoy every moment that we have left. Here's to those precious moments....

Prayers and Hugs,

Ash

Sad News Today...

This is Herbie's mom. Herbie's not feeling well today, as he hasn't been for the past several weeks. His hearing has deteriorated and his vision has all but failed. He's not been eating, and he's having difficulty swallowing.

Today's vet visit came with some very sad news... Herbie has several lumps in his throat which are most likely cancer. The vet is performing a biopsy, but the outlook is not good. Herbie's vet said that we could try chemo, but of course, in Herbie's state, that may only give him a few weeks--if not, months. We don't want to put Herbie through any more suffering that he has already endured. It's clear that he is not the same Herbie that he was six months ago.

Please pray for Herbie and send him healing thoughts. Our hearts are breaking right now for him. We don't know what our lives would be like without him, and we don't want to have to face that yet....