prey model

Last week a bird was dead at the bottom of the back stairs. When I saw it I was so excited, I just knew I had to have it. I grabbed it and ran off to my special place before Mom could stop me. By the time she'd caught up with me I'd eaten all the good parts -- all that was left were those bony, feathery wings and the back bone. It was sooooo yummmy! Mom laughed at me because I had feathers stuck between my teeth, but she didn't think it was so funny that she had to clean up the mess -- there were feathers everywhere!

Now I know birds are good to eat, so they're even more fun to chase. Mom says she won't feed me prey model, though, no matter how much I like it.

small game

I caught a rat today! It was right in the kitchen. Mom was really happy, because she's been trying to get rid of the rats with traps. I've heard rats in the pantry before, but this time I POUNCED and caught it in a blink!

Then Mom yelled at me to take it outside. Instead, I took it to my special place in the hall where I take all my treats and toys and dropped it. Mom kept yelling at me to take it outside, but I didn't want to -- I wanted her to go away so I could eat it. She also scolded me because it wasn't all the way dead. Sheesh! There's no pleasing her. Finally she put a bowl over the rat and called Uncle Mikey and he came and took it away. So I didn't get to eat it.

Bad Dog

Last night, Mom called me a "BAD DOG!!!!!" She said when she leaves her shoes on the floor and I rip them up, that's her fault; but when I take them out of her tote bag and rip them up, that's me being a bad dog. How am I supposed to remember all these rules?!!!!!!

Emergency!

So, Uncle Mikey and I were out with his bicycle last night, and we stopped at a friend's house to visit. We were in the kitchen and there was all this yummy Chinese food, and I was hungry, so when I saw something that smelled interesting on the floor I started to eat it. Then Uncle Mikey saw me and said "what's that?" and his friend said "rat poison!"

Uncle Mikey grabbed me so fast I hardly had time to swallow. And then he called Mom and Mom came right away. We got in the car and Uncle Mikey held me all the way to a place I'd never been before. Mom said it was the "emergency vet"! The people there were really nice, but they stuck a needle in my butt that made me throw up. I barfed and barfed and barfed until all the poison was out of me. Then they stuck another needle in me they said was the "antidote." They put me in a run to make sure I was done barfing -- it seemed like for-ev-er and I wanted to go home! I barked and barked and barked -- Mom said she could hear me all the way in the waiting room because my bark is really, really loud and "carries well." Finally they said I could go home.

Mom and Uncle Mikey took me home, and then Mom gave me dinner. My tummy was empty and I was soooo hungry I didn't even care that she squirted this black stuff all over my food. It looked yucky but it tasted pretty good and I ate it all up. Then I was really tired and went to sleep with Mom.

Now Uncle Mikey says he has to check for stuff like that every time he takes me somewhere. He was really upset, but Mom was cool. She said it's not his fault I'll eat anything!

More adventures in countersurfing

Mom left a hunk of cheese near the edge of the counter yesterday. Silly Mom -- she knows I love cheese. I nabbed it when her back was turned and snuck it out of the kitchen. Then she saw me, so I gulped it down real fast.

Ow! Ow ow ow ow ow! It made my nose and mouth hurt and my eyes water and when mom saw that she was mean! She laughed and laughed! She told Aunty Cindy maybe next time I'll leave her cheddar with horseradish alone.

pets

I have some pets! They're turtles! Uncle Mikey put them in the back yard, but I brought them in the house to play with. Mom was really surprised when I brought her one in bed. BOL!!!!!!!

The turtles don't like to play with me, though. They pull into their shells and stay there. I think I'd rather have a kitten.

rats!

My favorite squeaky came home today! It turned out that Uncle Mikey had thrown it up on the roof of the shed and it landed in a rats' nest so it didn't roll down. But Uncle Mikey cleaned out the nest and got my squeaky back. It still squeaks really, really loud, and now it smells of rats!!!!!! So it's even more fun to pretend that the squeaky is a rat I'm killing.

Then, I killed a real rat! I took it to Uncle Mikey and he was so happy with me. Uncle Mikey has killed lots and lots of rats, so I was really proud to help out. Mom was proud, too. She likes that I'm a mighty hunter. Besides, real rats don't squeak as much as squeaky toys, so killing a real rat is much quieter for Mom. BOL!

Update: Today I found a dried-out dead rat and left it in the hall for Mom. She was very annoyed -- she said she can't clean up my icky messes and still get to work on time.

help, I'm being abused!

Mom cooked bacon two days in a row and didn't give me any. And today she put me in my crate while she was working outside and squeaked my favorite squeaky really loud a bunch of times. I barked and whined and she paid no attention whatsoever. Someone call the SPCA, please!

Fun with Trees

Uncle Mikey likes to play a game with me where he throws one of my toys up in the tree, and when it falls down, I pounce on it and pretend it's a squirrel. I think this game is fun, but Mom is always warning him that if my favorite squeaky toy gets stuck in the tree, he's going to have to get it down, and it's a BIG tree.

But Uncle Mikey is kinda goofy, and he keeps playing this game with me anyway. We both like it -- it's so fun! Today Mom was telling him again, that if the toy gets stuck, he has to get up in the tree and get it, and on the very next throw, my very most favoritest squeaky got stuck in the tree waaaaaaay up high!

It was too high to reach even with the big ladder, so Uncle Mikey decided to throw more stuff into the tree to knock it down. First he threw a big ball -- that was fun to chase when it came down, but my squeaky was still in the tree. Then he got a big metal bucket that Mom uses to mop the floors and threw it up in the tree. I didn't get to try to catch that one, because Mom was afraid it would come down and hurt me so I stayed on the porch with her.

But the second time Uncle Mikey threw the bucket up in the tree it didn't come down -- it was stuck in the tree, too! Mom started laughing so hard she let go of me. She laughed so hard she was bending over and holding her stomach!

Then Uncle Mikey got the stick with the net at the end he sometimes uses to throw balls for me and threw it up in the tree at the bucket, and it got stuck. Now Mom was laughing so hard I thought she was going to hurt herself -- she just couldn't stop! Uncle Mikey threw the rake at the stick with the net, and the net-stick came down but the rake stuck!

Finally, Uncle Mikey got the rake and the bucket down, but my squeaky was still stuck waaaaay high up in the tree. So he went next door and got an even bigger ladder and used it to whack the tree branches. That was fun, because lots of small branches and leaves came down on us. Finally, my squeaky came down. Squeak, squeak, squeak! I was happy, and Mom said she can't remember ever laughing that hard. Uncle Mikey was the only one who didn't seem too happy, maybe because he spent almost an hour trying to get my squeaky out of the tree and he still had to finish the job he was doing for Mom. When he played with me later, he didn't throw the squeaky anywhere near the tree, so I guess we aren't going to play the pretend-squirrel game any more. Too bad -- Mom and I really had fun today! BOL!

I'm a swinger

Mom has a tree swing in the backyard. Today she picked me up and held me in her lap and we swinged together. Back and forth, back and forth. I thought it would be scary, but it was actually pretty nice. Very soothing. Back and forth, back and forth.