Gym Dog!

I just got back from the gym, and I feel much better after my "doggy workout". I started with some spinning (that is when you spin a rawhide bone around for a couple of minutes before you eat it). Then I lifted some weights. (I lifted a very heavy bone to my mouth, and it was delicious!) I walked on a treadmill for about 2 minutes until I noticed that I wasn't going anywhere so I got off that stupid treadmill. Then I had a big snack--after all, I burned a lot of calories while I was working out at the gym. Then I came home and took a nap. Okay, to be truthful, I took a nap when I got to the car, and another nap when I got home. I was worn out from all the work at the gym!

Demon Flash Bandit (Member of Gym)

Shake Paws: Good or Bad Idea?

I must share this video with my pals who haven't seen it because it is hilarious. It is called a Sad Dog's Diary, and it was shared by the same human(?) who shared the Sad Cat's Diary. This means that this human meets a lot of sad animals who write diaries. Here is the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xw1C5T-fH2Y

This diary entry has made me think about something that we dogs don't normally worry about. That is-just what are we agreeing to when we shake paws with the humans. Perhaps it is just because cats are naturally suspicious compared to us dogs, but maybe we dogs whould be a bit more suspicious since some of the humans clearly do not act in a dog's best interests. I will contemplate this further while I drift off to sleep.

Demon Flash Bandit (Should We Shake Paws With the Humans?)

Tired Dog

First, I want to warn my readers of a scam involving us dogs and a business opportunity that is bogus. Here is the link in case you are interested, steer clear of this "business".

http://on.aol.com/video/stray-animal-service- a-scam-517798737?hp=1&playlist=127173&icid=maing-grid7%7Cmai n5%7Cdl21%7Csec1_lnk3%26pLid%3D320634

Some of the humans just can't seem to be honest, and now they are using the honest humans love of dogs to scam them out of money--money which could be better spent on bones for your dog!

It is a normal day around here. Angel Zoom Smokey is zooming around the house, and I'm trying to stay out of her way which means I'm about to lie down and take a nap. I don't know why a dog wants to zoom when that time could be better spent napping!

Demon Flash Bandit (Tired Dog)

I Like Bones!

I've written a song that I think will be a big hit among dogs:

I Want Bones!

I want bones, lots of bones, more and more bones.
This dog wants some bones.

I want bones, rawhide bones, dingo bones, milkbones
Any kind of bones.

I can never get too many bones because I love to chew on them.

Give me bones, lot of bones, more and more bones
and I'll be a happy dog!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Enjoys a Good Bone)

Dancing Dog!

You put your right paw in, you put your right paw out, you put your right paw in and you shake it all about....oh hello...I was just practicing my dance moves. Yes, I, Demon Flash Bandit, will be dancing in a new television program, "Dancing With the Dogs". Finally, the network execuatives have learned what we dogs knew all along--that dancing shows involving dogs are much more interesting that ones involving humans. It may take awhile for the humans to discover these simple facts, but at least they learn eventually, and now the humans can watch "must see, tv".

Demon Flash Bandit (Dancing Dog)

I Want to Be an Airport Dog

Mommy had a dr.'s appointment that was in another city yesterday so she was gone for a long time, and neglected to write my dary entry. I'm sorry that my readers weren't able to access my wisdom for an entire day. My Mommy should know better.

I want to share a program with my fellow dogs that many of us are well suited to take part in. That program involves being an "airport dog". No, not the ones who sniff out bombs or drugs, but the ones who give love and receive love from the passengers. Here is the link to read more about it:
http://www.sify.com/news/newest-dogs-in-us-airports-wan t-hugs-not-drugs-news-international-nf4rJbefiij.html

I think most of us dogs would enjoy going to the airport to provide this service to the humans!

Demon Flash Bandit (Could be Airport Dog)

I'm Not Mail!

I don't consider myself to be paranoid, but yesterday, I woke up from a nap, and my back paws were covered with bubble wrap like you use for shipping packages. Mommy says the roll fell off the dresser and landed on my paws, but I think that Mommy is being naive. I think Angel Zoom Smokey got up on the dresser, and put the bubble wrap on my paws because she is planning to mail me somewhere. Don't get me wrong-I wouldn't mind being mailed to some paradise like Alaska, but I wouldn't want to be mailed there without my humans. If I went there, I would want them to accompany me there. I'm not even sure what the post office's hamburger policy might be. I guess I had better start sleeping with one eye open although I do think I'm safe. I don't think Mommy will allow Angel to mail me anywhere because I know Mommy loves me and is very attached to me.

Demon Flash Bandit (Doesn't Want to be Packaged and Mailed)

Dog With Big Ego

I would like to thank my pal, Finley, for the baseball on my page. It is finally baseball season, and that is the only sport that my human Mommy can tolerate. She thinks all other sports are stupid, and that includes car racing which is annoying because I think I would make a great race car driver. I can just see myself winning that race in Indianapolis, but I will never have the opportunity since Mommy won't take me there or buy me a race car to drive. I wonder how many bones a race car costs anyway. I guess it is good for the human drivers that they don't have to compete with us dogs because they wouldn't stand a chance against us.

I want to conpawtulate my pal, Fizzy, for again being a diary pick and I want to thank dogster for choosing my diary entry again today. Perhaps I should say that I appreciate them being lazy and not choosing new diary picks so that I get to be one two days in a roll. If they want to save themselves some work, they could just make my entry a permanent diary choice. Mommy says that wouldn't be fair, and I have too big an ego, but I say if the ego fits, wear it. In fact, I think all us dogs have big egos, but we just don't mind other dogs being important too.

I hope everyone is having a nice holiday weekend!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog With Big Ego)

Angel Zoom Smokey Is in BIG Trouble now!

I would like to conpawtulate my pal, Fizzy, for being chosen as a diary pick today. I also want to thank dogster for choosing my diary as a diary pick. I will assume that the dogs at HQ are sympathetic to my plight about hiring a lawyer to go after Angel Zoom Smokey for stealing my treats. My blog yesterday was about a woman in North Carolina who had her 13 year old son arrested for stealing her poptarts. Angel Zoom Smokey had better watch her tail in the future or she is going to be arrested while I'm singing, "Bad dogs bad dogs, what you gonna do, what you gonna do when they come for you". That would teach her to mess with the Deemster!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Means Business)

Hiring a Doggy Lawyer!

I am very upset about the slight Angel Zoom Smokey and I received on MOther's Day when we didn't get gifts despite it being both Mother's Day, and one of my brother's birthdays which I wrote about yesterday. I just got off the phone with a lawyer, and he says I don't have a case because there is no precedent for a dog having to be given a gift on human special occasiona. I think I barked at the wrong lawyer because this lawyer was a human. I am on the Internet now looking for a puppy lawyer because I bet a puppy whose a lawyer would see the whole situation more clearly since we dogs are so much smarter than the humans. I've got to go now and make a telephone call!

Demon Flash Bandit (Calling a Doggy Lawyer)