September 7th 2008 5:35 pm
[ Leave A Comment ]

Mom and dad did me the ultimate act of love and let me go on Friday. Mom begged me silently my whole life not to make her make that decision because she didn't know if she could, but it turns out that love this deep brings whatever strength you have and multiplies it to a level that no one knows they have until they are there.

They let me go Friday evening. I was all snug in my bed in the living room after being outside in my front yard in the fresh air and sunshine all afternoon, with mom and dad loving on me with a gentle intensity I will never forget. My auntie H (who had Loki) came to see me and my grandyparents did too. Alistair's parents also came to say goodbye. Then I made my last walk up my front steps and got right in my bed.
Mom had it all pretty with candles and a flower above the fireplace.

Afterward, mom sat up with me for most of the night, stroking my fur, talking to me and writing me love letters.

In the morning, mom and dad made a place for me in the back yard, right near Jax. It's always been my favorite corner of the yard. It's nice and shady and I can keep my eye on every part of the yard, and the house. I'd dig myself a nice dirt bed, arrange it so it was all comfy so my chin could rest on the edge of my hole and I could look out, or snooze.

They took out a tree and started digging. Dad got the root ball out and sat down and looked up and saw it from my perspective and said, "No wonder it's his favorite spot. Look at what he got to look at." Dad kept digging, but I guess he didn't quite get what mom had in mind. He was digging right by the fence, along the fence line, but mom said I had to be curled in the corner, the way I always was, so she started expanding it in a different direction and it turned out to be in the shape of a heart.

Mom is going to make it a really beautiful place so they can come out there and sit and be with us. She has been out here all weekend talking to me and Jax and getting it cleaned up. She's crying a lot and that's hard for me to see. I know she'll be ok eventually because she has my dad, Jax, her family, and my Bodacious aunties looking out for her. And I will never ever take my eyes off of her.