Dogster

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Since You Left Us.

I Miss His Feet

Jesse had the most perfect feet. It is my last good memory of him still living. We were together in the vet's office waiting for the lab results, and I just sat there and held his little feet. I rubbed them and just looked at them, and he laid there so calmly, it was as if we were holding hands. They were so solid and they had these little tufts of fur peeking out from the pads. I even loved his toenails.

I miss the sound his nails made on the wood floor when he would walk through the house. I miss the scratches he made in the floor when he would chase Abby around the coffee table.

I miss his feet.

One Year Ago Today

This was our last morning together, but you were miserable from weakness and discomfort. You DID manage to eat two bites of my scrambled egg, what a treat to get people food. And then you laid on the floor til I called the vet with my list of symptoms and hopes for an early appointment.

Dad said goodbye to you on his way to work, but he didn't know that he would never see you again. I know he regrets being so far away from us when the numbers fell and the big decisions had to be made. He did not know that he would have to make the choice by telephone.

My greatest wish that day? That I had waited til Dad was back from work, that I had taken you out for the day, just the two of us in the September sunshine. That I had bought you McNugggets from McDonalds and french fries and we had had a picnic at the dog park. That I had asked the vet to come to our home and help you pass. That I had accompanied you to the crematory myself, and stayed with you til 'it' happened.

I think of you every day.........every day. And I hold you close in my heart. I know that you would not have cared for Emerson in the least, but he has made it easier for me to go on without you.

I love you, little man. I can't wait til we are together again, forever.

Love,

Mommy

First Vacation

It's time for our first vacation without Jesse, the first big trip that he won't be going to his other favorite place, Boone Wood Kennel. For some reason, I am MISSING him so much today! I think the kennel owner is feeling the same, she wasn't nearly as excited to hear that Abby would be there without Jesse. He ruled the kennel, he was the boss man!

The first summer without him, he loved summer so much! He loved to frolick through the yard, and chase the bugs!

This boy will be forever in first place in my heart. Emerson has helped me so much, but I still miss my golden boy.