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Geoffy's Bark Book

A Man Named Wolf, or Tales of the Delishish Dish

So ol’ Geoffy not been writing so much in his diary lately. Gess thares not a lot goin on. jest the usual, eatin, sleepin, chasin squirrels, beggin, yu know. But I started havin sum trouble with my tummy. Not real, but my mom gets real worried bout me, even if I jest coff a liddle.

One day, in the summer, I got the runs really bad. Ever time I ate, boom, right owt the other end. Mom sed ‘of corse he git sick now, it’s the weekend an the Dogtor is closed.’ But I dint feel to bad, an they wuz fixin me chikin ‘n rice, one of my favorites. My mom held me a lot an we laid on the couch watchin TV. She tried to get Dogtor Tison to see me on Monday, but the lady sed he wuz jest too busy an they gave us his frens number at Arbuckle, or sumthing like that. Mom called an then she told my Mimi, ‘I cant take him thare, they don’t like Cresteds. He wont git gud care.’ So she called her fren Derec’s vet, Dogtor Wolf (gud name for an animal Dogtor doncha think?) They sed ‘bring ‘em in’, so Mimi took me. They gave her medicine for me, I had a slight ear infection too. Couple a days later an ol’ Geoffy wuz feeling preddy gud; I wuznt so crazy bout the ear drops, but whut can yu do?

Mom took me back a few days later for a re-check, an yu will never gess whut that gud man did. HE TOL MY MOM TO COOK FUD FOR ME. Geoffy LUVS cooked fud!!! He sed he thought my ear problem wuz frum allergies so he gave my mom a diet for me. Diet schmiet. Its cooked fud, an it smells so wonderful when its cookin I jest sit thare whimperin like a baby puppy. Its sort of embarrassing, but whut can yu do? It usually gits me a liddle bite here an thare. They call me the fud hore, whutever that is.

My ‘diet’ is cooked fish, cooked oatmeal, an cooked veggies an I LUV it! Did I say I luv it? Well I do. I gess its workin for my ears, they don’t itch much an they aren’t getting build up (sez THE man, Dogtor Wolf).

Thares jest one liddle problem. I been throwing up, not bad, but I would have to throw up really early in the morning. Ol’ Geoffy felt bedder after he barfed, but not mom. Well yu know, one thing leads to another, unless the lead takes yu for a walk, but wait, whut wuz I talking bout? Oh yeah, barfin. I heard my mom talking to my Mimi that maybe ‘he’ (that’s me, Geoffy) needs to eat regular fud. Well its back to my fren Dogtor Wolf.

Did I mention all the nice ladies that work thare? Even when they do my nails or take blood, I don’t mind. Well, I’m fudgin a liddle bout the nails, but they git the job done. An I am one huge squirmer. I got me sum strong liddle legs, ask enyone who ever tried to hold me when I dint want to be held, they can show yu the scars.

Enyhoo, Dogtor Wolf told mom that it wuz possible, but not probable, that I had sumthing called Addisons Disease. He had to do a test whare they give me a shot, then take blood an test it. He dint think that wuz whut wuz wrong with me, but they could rule it owt. So, couple a days later, my beloved Mimi LEFT ME THARE, jest brought me in, let the lady take me, an she LEFT!

A couple of days later my mom came an got me. Wait, mom sez it wuz not a couple of days, it wuz a couple of hours. Yu know, time passes differently for dogs, yu think that people would know that by now. Sheesh, an they git the opposable thumbs for Dog’s sake. But Dogtor Wolf had gud news for my mommy. No Addisons, but I do have a liddle sumthing wrong with my tummy. He thinks sumtimes fud stays in my stomach too long an makes me a liddle sick, so he wants my mom to give me a pill two times a day for three weeks to see if it helps stop the barfin. So far it has, but she still has to git up in the night sumtimes an git fud for me when I cant stop swallowin an lickin my mouth. But its all gud I gess, I’m still gittin the DELISHISH DISH!

If eny of yu live in Smyrna an yu need a gud Dogtor, try Smyrna Animal Hospital. They treat yu with respect, even if yu are a Crested (an yur mom is a worry wart)!

I want to give a liddle shout owt too, to my fren an cousin Pony Boy, an my deer, deer fren Amy! Hey dogs!

Geoff sez, be gud.

New Tales of Old: The Adventures of Sir Barxalot and- Chewsamuch

My mom sez she is going to put a story in for my diary; a story she's writting bout me an my best fren Pony. We have different names in her story, but we have some adventures. So be lookin for it. I think she start it preddy soon.

Emergency Vet Visit: Sir Barks-a-lot becomes Sir Barfs-a-lot

My mom sed we had an adventure this week. I don't know bout that, but I know I wuz sick. Im not sure whut happened. Me an Pon wuz hangin out with our Mimi, like we always do, playin owtside an stuff. Then we had our dinner, like we always do, an then my mom came home from workie, like she always does. Every thing wuz the same, cept when my mom an Mimi had thare dinner, my tummy started to feel bad. I went in my big bed an throwed up. A big one. Then I went in my liddle bed an throwed up sum more.

I wuz sort of scart, cuz my tummy kept feelin bad. I wuz sort of cryin an wanted my Mimi to hold me. I gess I thought she could make me feel bedder, but it dint work.

My Mimi cleaned my beds an I tried to lay down, but oh no, heer it comes agin, uggh, Geoffy puked agin. Mimi cleaned my bed agin. I got on my moms bed, maybe she could make me feel bedder. Almost, but then I had to go poop, bad. Mom let me owtside an not a minute too soon. I tell yu, ol Geoffy wuz not a happy camper. When I came back in the howse, my mom put my harness on me. Cool, we wuz goin bye-bye. We wuz drivin an drivin, bout 2 days or so an I heerd my mom tell my Mimi, heer it is. Finally, right when she wuz turnin in the drive, I puked agin. My mom got me owt an I wuz smellin all kinds of dogs an stuff an I had to pee, a lot.

They taked me in an a nice lady carried me to the back ware all the cages are. A nice dogtor got me an sort of squeezed all aroun on my tummy an stuff, taked my temperature (not cool) an stuff. I wuz startin to feel bedder, all the bad stuff wuz owt of me by then; but they put me back in the cage an I not like that, so I wuz barkin an barkin an thare wuz another dog barkin to git owt too (my mom sed "I heerd yu barkin in thare Geoffy, yu naughty monkey). A lady got me owt an put a string around my neck (why not use my lead??) an took me owt a door. Oh boy! Thare wuz my mommy an my Mimi. I wuz so glad to see them. I even let my mom put my harness on me withowt fightin it.

When we wuz drivin home (a couple of days) my tummy felt jest a liddle bit bad, but not like I would throw up. I wuz so tired when we got home, I jest got in my mommys bed an went right to sleep.

I wuz really hongry in the morning; gess whut my Mimi did? She made rice for ol Geoffy, an CHIKIN! Oh I LUV rice an chikin, sorry I drule a liddle bit. I got to eat rice an chikin for a couple of days, an Mimi gave it to me almost whenever I wanted it. Pony got to have it too cuz she sed she couldnt give me sumthin an not give to Pony too. Pon wuz a happy liddle dog.

They started puttin my dry fud in it an it wuz preddy gud too. This mornin my mom jest gave me my dry fud, but heck, it wuz really gud. I ate it all up an went back to bed.

Life is gud (when yu aint barfin).