Blog Things ( Bree's personality/quizzes )

Your Monster Profile
Omega Claw
You Feast On: Snow Cones
You Lurk Around In: The Backseats of Cars
You Especially Like to Torment: Lawyers
What's Your Monster Name?

You Are Italian Food
Comforting yet overwhelming.
People love you, but sometimes you're just too much.
What Kind of Food Are You?

Your Fortune Is
Beauty is only a light switch away.
The Wacky Fortune Cookie Generator

Your Personality Profile
You are dreamy, peaceful, and young at heart.
Optimistic and caring, you tend to see the best in people.
You tend to be always smiling - and making others smile.
You are shy and intelligent... and a very hard worker.
You're also funny, but many people don't see your funny side.
Your subtle dry humor leaves your close friends in stitches.
The World's Shortest Personality Test

You Are a Margarita
You aren't just the life of the party, you are the party!
You mix a good drink, bust out some great music, and know how to get down.
What Mixed Drink Are You?

You Are 40% Weird
Normal enough to know that you're weird...
But too damn weird to do anything about it!
How Weird Are You?

Your Outrageous Name is:
Amanda Hugnkiss
Outrageous Name Generator

Your Hidden Talent
Your natural talent is interpersonal relations and dealing with people.
You communicate well and are able to bring disparate groups together.
Your calming presence helps everything go more smoothly.
People crave your praise and complements.
What's Your Hidden Talent?

Your Hawaiian Name is:
Oliana Lana
What's your Hawaiian Name?

Gummy Bears
You may be smooshie and taste unnatural, but you're so darn cute.
What Kind of Candy Are You?

How to give the cat a pill...

Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered Doulton figurines from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

Call fire department to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed, force cat's mouth open with small wrench. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet mignon. Hold head vertically and pour ½ pint of water down throat to wash pill down.

Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture store on way home to order new table.

Dog Humar!

The day is divided into two important sections: the all-important mealtime, and everything else.

I. Mealtime

Just because there does not seem to be anything visible around to eat certainly does not mean there is nothing around to eat. The act of staring at the underside of a table or chair on which someone else is eating sets in motion a chain of events that eventually results in food.

It goes without saying that you should carefully check the lower third of any space for edibles. Mouth-sized things which cannot be identified by sight or smell are considered gum.

When you actually receive a meal, submerge your head into it as you would a shower. Never, never look up again until a minimum of at least fifteen minutes after the obvious food is gone. This is important. Just because your dish is empty does not mean that it is time to stop eating.

Remember that all food is potentially yours up until the time that it is actually swallowed by another. The lengthy path a piece of food will take from a plate to a mouth via a hand is as good a time as any to stake your claim to it.

When it comes to selecting an appropriate beverage, location and packaging mean nothing. There are absolutely no exceptions to this rule.

If you really see something you want, and all your other attempts at getting it have failed, it is only right to grovel shamelessly. As a second tactic, stare intently at the object of your desire, allowing long gelatinous drools to leak like icicles from your lower lip.

II. Everything Else

There are really only two important facial expressions to bother with: complete and overwhelming joy and nothing at all.

Any time that is not meal time is potentially nap time. The best time to take a nap is when you hear your name being called repeatedly. The best location for a nap is dead center of any street or driveway. The most relaxing position is on your side, all four limbs parallel.

The most practical way to get dry is to shake violently near a fully clothed person. A second effective method is to stand on a light-colored piece of furniture.

Personal Safety

At the first hint of any irregular noise, run from room to room barking loudly. If someone actually comes into the house, rush over to them whether you know them or not. Then kiss them so violently that they lose their balance or have to force you away physically.

The greatest unacknowledged threat to life as we have come to know it is squirrels. No matter what you must do, make sure there are none in your yard.


Recreation and Leisure

Ball: There are two equally amusing sets of rules you will want to know.

The Common Form, in which you receive a thrown ball and return it.

The Preferred Form, in which you receive a thrown ball and eat it.

Car: As you know, any open car door is an invitation to get in. Once inside, your only goal is to try to get out.


Health: In the event of a trip to the doctor, always be on your guard. If you are vaccinated, urinate on the physician.

http://www.pawsperouspets.com/humor/index.shtm l

Animal Facts Part 2!

A 1,200-pound horse eats about seven times it's own weight each year.

A bird requires more food in proportion to its size than a baby or a cat.

A capon is a castrated rooster.

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A cat's jaws cannot move sideways.

A chameleon's tongue is twice the length of its body.

A chimpanzee can learn to recognize itself in a mirror, but monkeys can't.

A Cornish game hen is really a young chicken, usually 5 to 6 weeks of age, that weighs no more than 2 pounds.

A cow gives nearly 200,000 glasses of milk in her lifetime.

A female mackerel lays about 500,000 eggs at one time.

A Holstein's spots are like a fingerprint or snowflake. No two cows have exactly the same pattern of spots.

A newborn kangaroo is about 1 inch in length.

A quarter of the horses in the US died of a vast virus epidemic in 1872.

A rat can last longer without water than a camel can.

A typical bed usually houses over 6 billion dust mites.

A woodpecker can peck twenty times a second.

A zebra is white with black stripes.

According to ancient Greek literature, when Odysseus arrived home after an absence of 20 years, disguised as a beggar, the only one to recognize him was his aged dog Argos, who wagged his tail at his master, and then died.

All clams start out as males; some decide to become females at some point in their lives.

All pet hamsters are descended from a single female wild golden hamster found with a litter of 12 young in Syria in 1930.

An iguana can stay under water for 28 minutes.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Animal gestation periods: the shortest is the American opossum, which bears its young 12 to 13 days after conception; the longest is the Asiatic elephant, taking 608 days, or just over 20 months.

Ants are social insects and live in colonies which may have as many as 500,000 individuals.
http://www.familypets.net/pet&animalfacts2.htm

Animal Facts!

A cat's whiskers are usually as wide as its body and as such, help them navigate through tight and narrow spaces. The average cat has 24 whiskers, 12 on each side.

Most domestic dogs are able to reach speeds of 19 miles per hour, when running full out. The greyhound, the king of canine speedsters, is capable of reaching speeds of up to 40 miles per hour! (The domestic cat can run as fast as 30 miles per hour.)

Americans spend almost $4 billion a year on cat food -- more than they spend on baby food.

At least 63% of dog owners admitted to kissing their dogs. Of these, some 45% kissed them on the nose, 19% on the neck, 7% on the back, 5% on the stomach and 2% on the legs. An additional 29% listed the place they kiss their dog as other!

Thirty-three percent of cat owners talk to their pets on the phone or through the answering machine.

Mad Dogs & Englishmen, a New York advertising agency, allows employees to bring their dogs to work with them. The firm was started by Nick Cohen, who brought his own two dogs to the office to keep him company. The agency prospered and as the number of workers grew, so did the number of pets. There are currently twenty-five employees, many of them dog lovers who bring their pets to work on alternate days, to "contribute to the creative environment."

The most popular names for male cats (in order) are: Tiger, Tigger, Smokey, Pepper, Max, Maxwell, Simon, Snoopy, Morris, Micky, Rusty, Rusti, Boots and Bootsie.

The top names for female cats are: Samantha, Misty, Patches, Cali, Muffin, Angel, Angela, Ginger, Tiger, Tigger, Princess, Punkin and Pumpkin.

A frightened dog puts it's tail between it's legs because it covers the scent glands in the anal area. Since the anal glands carry personal scents that identify individual dogs, the tail-between the-legs behavior is the canine equivalent of insecure humans hiding their faces.

The notion that cats and dogs are natural enemies (suggested by the phrase,"fighting like cats and dogs") is overstated, if not simply false. Generally speaking, cats and dogs get along better than cats and cats or dogs and dogs.

In ancient Rome, dusk had officially turned into night when one could no longer tell whether a canine in the distance was a dog or a wolf.

Cats sleep about two-thirds of the time, as compared to humans, who sleep about one-third of the time. Cats, however are generally light sleepers, easily awakened by possibly threatening sounds.

Unlike man, the dog is never impotent! This is because the male dog has a bone inside of his penis that helps maintain his erection.

The world's heaviest cat... No tubby tabby has yet bested the record set by Himmy, an Australian cat that tipped the scales at forty-five pounds, ten ounces in 1982.

The Dalmatian breed of dog originates from the Dalmatian Coast of Croatia.

Walt Disney named Mickey Mouse after Mickey Rooney, whose mother he dated for some time.

The name of the dog on the Cracker Jack box is "Bingo."

Cats prefer to eat their food at 86º F, which is why they don't immediately gulp down the half-eaten can of food from the refrigerator.

According to a survey by the American Animal Hospital Association, 53 percent of pet owners vacation or travel with their pets.

There's a "meow" in the middle of "homeowner."

Surveys show that 62 percent of dog owners admit that their dog owns a sweater, wintercoat or raincoat.

In 1987, cats overtook dogs as the number one pet in America.

History of the Boston Terrier

The Boston Terrier can trace its history back to 1865, in Boston, Massachusetts. At this time pit fighting between dogs was still a popular form of entertainment. There were a number of breeds of dogs that had their start in the fighting pit, and the Boston Terrier is no exception. The Boston Terrier of 1865 is not the dog we know today.
The history that has been passed down is that Robert C. Hooper, of Boston, Massachusetts, purchased a dog that was part English Bulldog, and part English Terrier (the English Terrier being an all white dog). This dog's name was Judge. He was rather tall in stature, was colored a dark brindle with a white stripe on his face. He possessed a square and blocky head, with a nearly even mouth. Judge weighed approximately 32 pounds. A cross breeding was arranged with a Bulldog-type female by the name of Gyp, who was owned by Edward Burnett, of Southboro, Massachusetts. Gyp was rather short statured, possessed a short, blocky head, and weighed around 20 pounds. What was interesting was that some of the offspring from this mating weighed in excess of 60 pounds. These were not wimpy dogs.
As time passed, these dogs were referred to as stableman's or the barber's dog. The reason being that the employees of the very wealthy (most centered around Breed's Hill of Boston), would get together to gossip, drink, and pass the time at the local tavern. Some of these employees had access to their employer's purebred dogs. These employees would borrow their employer's dogs and breed them to other dogs, and arrange for the puppies to "find new homes". The offspring would end up in the fighting pits, either as young pups to demonstrate their "courage", or as older dogs, to actually fight other dogs, rats, bulls, etc. What is interesting is that these breedings were not foolish, nor frivolous. These people were actually looking for certain qualities in the dogs that they were breeding. They did not know the science of genetics, but they did know that certain strengths could be passed from one generation to another. The dogs that were used in the fighting pits were also used as family dogs. Their devotion to their masters was notable even by the people who found pit fighting repugnant.
By 1891, the Boston Terrier was an established breed of dog. By this we mean that the Boston Terrier was reproducing true to its form. Offspring were consistently looking like their sire and dam. Forty breeders decided to form the American Bullterrier Club in Boston, and applied to the American Kennel Club for membership status. There were many objections raised due to the Boston Terrier not looking anything like a Bullterrier. Finally, a noted writer and authority, James Watson, suggested that since this new breed did not resemble the Bullterrier, that the dog should have its own identity. He felt that this dog having been bred in and around Boston, it should be named the Boston Terrier. So the club changed its name to the Boston Terrier Club and in 1893 it was admitted to membership in the A.K.C.
If we advance the years to the early 1900's, we still can find Boston Terriers being shown in the Conformation Ring weighing around 30 pounds. However, in the 1920's breeders started to pay more attention to the markings on the body, and the body proportions. Pit fighting, for the most part, was illegal in most states, and its popularity was dwindling. So the breeders started looking at the dog as a companion. Remember that these dogs already had a reputation for having a notable devotion to their masters and family. By the 1950's the Boston Terrier was very much like the dog we know today. For show purposes, there are three weight classes that pertain to the Boston - they are light (under 15 lbs.), middle (under 20 lbs.), and heavy-weight (under 25 lbs.).
The Boston Terrier Club has as a guideline for its member breeders - "We are the heirs of the past, and the Trustees of the future." If only all breeders felt that way about their charges.

http://www.barkbytes.com/history/boston.htm

Bree's Virtual Pets!

adopt your own virtual pet!
adopt your own virtual pet!
adopt your own virtual pet!

Quiz: Bree's best Halloween costume!

Your costume is a dark fairy costume!
What Should Your Halloween Costume Be? brought to you by Quizilla

What kind of wich am I?

PURPLE WITCH
The witch of success, you are confident in yourselfand in the things you do. Once you mastersomething, youve learned it for life. Otherscome to you for help with their problems andyou are happy to help them whenever possible.Others feel safe when they talk to you aboutanything and you feel honored to have them seekyou out for help. You are the Purple Witch.
What Color Witch Are You brought to you by Quizilla

Have YOU gone to the DOGS?!

This is really cute guys! I was looking around the internet for some good story's to put in my diary. It was writen by:

Posted on canine-l by dennisr


You know you have gone to the "DOGS" when ...

* Nobody's feet are allowed on the furniture, but your dogs are welcome to sleep on any piece they so choose.

* It takes an entirely separate garbage can to handle all the poop.

* All kinds of things around the house are in need of repair, but the injured dog you rescued by the side of the road requires immediate surgery and out comes the checkbook.

* You and your family haven't had your annual check up in two years, but the dogs are all medically up to date.

* You start barking at your children to "Sit! Stay!"

* You're more concerned with the dogs' needs than your own when the budget gets tight.

* At least three of your five weeks vacation are scheduled around grooming, vaccinations and dental cleaning...all for the dogs!

* Dog crates double as chairs and/or tables in your family room.

* You can only remember people by associating them with their dog.

* Overnight guests (who share your bed) are offended by having to sleep with you and the dog(s).

* You snuggle closer to the dog than the person with whom you are sleeping.

* You decide to downsize from a huge house in the city to an average country cottage with lots of land in order to build the kennel of your dreams.

* You spend more time looking through mail order catalogues for dog supplies than for Victoria's Secret nighties or Miles Kimball gadgets.

* All your social activities revolved around other dog people.

* Your voice is immediately recognized by your vet's receptionist.

* Everyone in the office is eager to know if the dogs are all right because you were late for the meeting.

* The whereabouts of all your important legal and personal documents escapes you, yet you know precisely where to locate the file that includes all the vet records, breed papers and registration.

* Your trunk has an emergency food kit for any strays you might come across.

* The majority of your charitable contributions go to animal organizations.

* To win a precious .75 show ribbon, you think nothing of forking out hundreds of dollars to board/pet sit the other dogs, pay for entry fees, gas, accommodations and meals.

* You no longer have to buy extra large garbage bags, because the empty, 40 pound dog food bags work just as well.

* Complete strangers call you on the phone to ask a question because they heard you were a "dog person."

* Your mom calls and asks how the granddogs are.

* Every gift you ever get has something to do with dogs.

* Your cookie jar has never seen the likes of people cookies.

* You rip up the carpet and lay tile to make clean up so much easier.

* Your children (wife, husband) complain that you always take more pictures of the dog than you do of them.

* While proudly showing off your family album, your guest asks, "Isn't there anyone else in your family besides the dog?"

* Any conversation you're having is effortlessly directed back to the topic of dogs.

* Your first concern when planning a vacation is whether or not the hotel will take pets.

* You politely bow out of an important social engagement so you can attend a dog show.

* The number one priority when buying a new house is the size and landscape of the backyard.

* The only (or at least first) forum you log onto is the animal forum.

* You describe your children as having temperaments rather than personalities.

* The cost of boarding your furkids equals that of your entire vacation.

* Your dog decides he doesn't like someone and you tend to agree.

* All your non-dog friends know to dress down when visiting your house.

* Your friends know which chair not to sit in.

* First time visitors wonder aloud, "Do you smell something?" and you really don't.

* You become the family dog kennel for all your relatives.

* You don't think twice about sitting on the floor because both the couch and the chair are completely dog full.

* Your desk proudly displays your canine family.

* All dates must pass your dog's inspection.

* The first question you ask when on a date is, "So, do you like animals?"

* You buy a bigger bed that will comfortably sleep six.

* You break down and buy another pillow so you can have one to sleep on.

* More than half of your grocery money goes to dog food and treats.

* You buy a mini van to give them all enough travel room.

* Your carpeting matches the color of your dog -- purposely.

* The thought of changing a baby's diaper makes you swoon, but you can pick up dog poop barehanded, if necessary, without batting an eye.

* You send out specially-made holiday cards that feature you and the dogs.

* Your spouse issues the ultimatum "It's them or me" and you have no problem pointing out the suitcase.

* You readily allow them to give you slobbery kisses, but you don't dare wipe a toddler's nose.

* Onlookers grimace at the sight of you sharing your sandwich with your four-legged pal, bite for bite.

* Your dog has the best birthday party over and above any kid in the entire neighborhood.

* Your dogs eat only the most nutritionally sound food, while your favorite meal is mac 'n cheese.

* You've traced your dog's family tree further than you have your own.

* You're more familiar with dog laws than you are with people laws.

* You stagger your dog magazine subscriptions to make sure you'll receive one every week.

* Your vet's office number is the first one on your speed dial list; his home is number two.

* One of your vet files is labeled "Other."

* Your vet takes a few extra courses just to keep up with your breed's assorted ailments.

* Your file is the only one that remains in the "IN" box.

* Your file rivals War And Peace.