Dogster

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It's tough being a big dog in little dog's body

Long time no see

Alright, I'm an evil little doggy. I have not written in a LONG, LONG time. I still stroll around every once in a while, but I don't write often.
I've just gotten so complacent. I run around like an idiot, sleep, and bug my humans. That's about it.
It is my birthday soon though!! I wonder if I'll get presents. I have to say thanks to dogster for my bones, but I'd better get a big chew like Flash's that he can't steal from me. He always steals my little bones. I think I'm free to eat his big one, but when he finishes mine off, he comes and takes his back. So unfair, but hey life is mostly gravy!
I'd better run. Awfully busy trying to come up with a way to chew up mom's new leather chair.
Louis

Lessons learned

Well, I guess I never got around to reporting back on the evil scheme. I have to say I tried it all and was not successful. I did learn some valuable lessons though.
1) If you run out of the house when your sister goes to school, mom will just shut you in the bedroom when she's leaving
2) Mom's aren't above their own version of evil scheming (calling me in for treats when Taylor's leaving)
3) Mom gets REALLY pissed when she has to chase me (It's only fun until she catches you, and believe me, she will)
4) Regaurdless of good reasons, going potty on the floor will ALWAYS get you in trouble (yes, even torrential down pours don't qualify)
5) The crate is much more acceptable if you behave like a total idiot and spaz out from about 4:30 a.m. until 9:00am when mom puts me in it. (by then I'm soo tired I just go right in myself--mom says it's a good thing too, cuz she wants to "ring my neck" whatever that means
6) Make sure to not pester the big black lab too much before 8:00 or he will bite you
7) Big black labs named Flash do not appreciate chiropractic adjustments early in the morning, but if you wait until later, he will let you stand on his back all day
Well, I think that's it. My paws are tired. I need to run and find something to chew on.
Louis

Fed up!! Just going to pee EVERYWHERE until I get what I- want!

I am fed up! My human sister is gone all the time! She leaves in the morning when I get up and doesn't come home until late in the afternoon! Why isn't she home to play with me all day?
My mommy just yells at me all the time! I get bored and chew things up and I have decided to forget about peeing outside. Why should I?
I have to be in my crate for three whole hours in the morning and then again after my lunch. It's boring, boring, boring. I think I will devise a scheme to kidnap my sister from school. (Whatever that is)
I'm starting with peeing, who knows where I will end! If she doesn't quit spending time with school books, I think I will chew them up and eat her homework!! I heard that was an excuse kids use. I did chew the corner of her paper! Maybe the teacher will send her home to stay!!
On a happier note, I did get to go camping this weekend. My mommy and daddy's friends had a lab. At first her and Flash were ignoring me, but I showed her who was boss! If Flash wouldn't have jumped in between us I would have eaten her up!! I'm tough. Maybe I can use that to get Taylor to stay home? I guess that's all I can think about.
I better go. I think she left her bedroom door cracked. I'm gonna see if I can eat her fish! She won't even know it was me. I'll write everyday about how my evil scheme is coming along.
Louis XIV