October 20th 2011 6:29 pm
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Mom has been so busy she hasn't been keeping up with my diary. Shame on her! I have been a buys schnauzer and so much has happened since summer. My schnauzer buds Piper and Milo came to live with us while their mom went away to school. I thought they were just visiting, but then they didn't leave. In my opinion, this is just too much of a good thing. I felt like they can go any time now. Then my Auntie Jen came and got Milo -
I'm so glad cause all that barking was giving me a headache and making me grumpy. Piper seemed to really like Milo gone too and the house seemed much emptier with just him gone, even though there were 2 other dogs here, sometimes 4 when my sisters come every other week. Only a month later, here she comes back with him. I guess she got a headache too with all his barking. Now he's living here again. He really gives Piper his brother a hard time, but what do I care?
Riley is still here. I have come to accept he is staying for good (or bad). He's almost 1 1/2 years old now and isn't as annoying as when he first came, but he still tears up everything. Mom has my toys safely put away. She said she will give them back when Riley stops chewing. Today mom gave me my squirrel and Riley took it and I barked so ferociously that he went to mom and gave it to her. Ha! I showed him!
The good thing about the boys (Piper and Milo) being here is that Riley picks on them and leaves me alone. (Big schnauzer smile)
Mom found a new (to us) dog park and we've been going there a lot. I don't play with other dogs - that would be way beneath me. But there are lots of smells that keep me busy while Riley greets everyone and generally acts like a fool. I pretend I don't know him, let alone live with him. I hear people say how beautiful I am and that's enough for me. I have admirers everywhere I go.
I should go now and make sure everyone is behaving themselves before I go to my kennel and wait for my night-night treat.
Love to all my many admirers,
Lexi the beautiful
October 20th 2011 6:35 pm
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Now Riley is working on Freestyle. Talk about invading my turf! Mom's taking him to the OCC with us and everything. So one day mom took Riley somewhere - I know it must have been a fun place where he got all the attention that is mine - and then mom had the nerve to come home with him and say, "Lexi, let me tell you what Riley did." I got so mad that I head butted her right on the bridge of her nose. Gave her a headache for 2 days. She hasn't tried to tell me what Riley did since that. Guess she's trainable.
October 20th 2011 6:44 pm
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Mom found this little pea-sized lump under my arm so what does she do but take me to the vet. I start shaking now every time she takes me to that place. I don't like it there. They are always sticking something up my behind. Next thing I know I am waking up and I am all shaved under my arm and there are things called stitches sticking out of me. What the...?
The next day my Auntie Jen came all the way from somewhere called Indiana to see me here in Tennessee. I love my Auntie Jen. I threw up my arm so she could see my boo boo. She didn't notice right away so I had to do it again, and then she gave me lots of sympathy. That was good. I went on to do other things as soon as she finished poor babying me. I wanted everyone to know what happened and feel bad for me, so everytime I saw someone else I did the same thing. Some people were slower than others, but I was patient and kept throwing up my arm until they understood. One night I was showing my dad again and he cleared his throat kind of embarassed like and said, uh Lexi, wrong arm. So I did a quick switch and raised my other arm like nothing had happened. How was I supposed to keep track of it now that they took out the stitches? It really wasn't my fault. Then a new lady I am told is Aunt Rhonda came and stayed with me while mom and dad were away for a night. She understood right away when I showed her my boo boo. She was so sweet about it that I decided I really liked her and let her sleep in the bed with me. Mom says I am milking this for all it is worth. I say, when you find a good thing, use it.
Lexi the poor baby
February 28th 2012 5:01 pm
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It has been waaaay too long since Mom helped me with my diary. Let's see if I can get caught up. The imposters are still here -that would be Milo and Piper. Riley is bigger than ever and still here. He likes Piper best and always is bothering him, so he leaves me alone. Maybe we should just always keep Piper so Riley never bothers me. I think I will go tell mom that.
Hey, I got stairs and treats for Christmas. The stairs are next to the bed and it is just soooo easy to run up them to jump on mom's bladder in the morning. Love it!
I have been working on a new Freestyle routine for level 3. I am doing really good (naturally), even though sometimes mom forgets it or changes it. I really do try to help her remember. After all, there are lots of treats involved. It is fun working with mom, but more fun getting lots of treats!
I get to go ride around in a pedicab this week with Karley who is going to pretend she is Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. That means I will pretend to be Toto again, even though I don't have the right haircut right now for that. I think there will be treats and petting involved, so I'm really good with that. It is to promote the movie being shown at the Tivoli Theater this Saturday. I wanted to be on stage, but the Tivoli said they would have to pay too much for permits. What the...?
I guess that's it for now. Pretty boring, huh? Catch ya next time.
August 10th 2012 1:29 pm
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Hello again, my adoring fans.
In my last entry I mentioned the fun pedicab ride I was about to take to promote the Wizard of Oz. Well, wouldn't you know, tornadoes started ripping through town, and there I am out with my newest Dorothy, thinking I am about to get blown all the way to Oz!! We went in a restaurant (yes, I said WE went in a restaurant - a lifelong dream of mine)and walked around and nobody even cared I -a dog - was there. The smells about drove me mad. But I managed to retain my professional composure and didn't beg or steal anyone's food. Meanwhile, Mom was in the basement where she worked, just like in Oz when everyone went in the storm shelter. People still on the street kept looking at the skies and saying, "How did you manage the weather?" to my Dorothy. It was pretty cool.
Then in April Mom and I competed in Freestyle. I got third place in my division. Mom said it didn't count, since it was also last place. Hmmmm. I think she has a bad attitude about it. She wouldn't even let me wear my ribbon. I decided to change the routine, and is it my fault she couldn't follow along? She was not happy with me for a whole week. Geesh. You would think I had done my business on the floor in front of everyone, or something else as mortifying. I think she is looking for different music, as though that will help! Ha!
Lexi, still in Tennessee
October 9th 2012 12:46 pm
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Hi Brothers and Sisters,
I go with my mom to the church where she works and do therapy (unofficially) and ask for food until it is time to go to the hospital to therapize the poor sick kids (who often have food too). All that to say, the staff at the church all know and love me - what's not to love! Knowing this, it came as no surprise that I was asked to come to Sunday school to visit with the kids on the Sunday they celebrated St. Francis of Assisi (patron Saint of animals, for all you unchurched canines out there).
Out in the hallway before the class started, one girl screeched when she saw me. I would like to think it was with delight, but it sounded more like fear. She smelled like fear, too. Then we all went into the classroom and there were 6 or 7 kids (math isn't my strong point so it might have been more)who all sat in a circle on the floor with a few grown-ups, including my mom. The girl who screeched was given a chair to sit in and one of my church friends, Mary Gardner, said it was so she would be more comfortable with her dress. I knew Mary Gardner was just being nice, because I knew the fear girl was up in that chair so that she didn't have to be too close to the source of her fear - me! Well, I also knew just what to do - I am a therapy dog, after all, duh. First, I walked around the inside of the circle, checking out everybody (no one had any food, by the way). When I got to the fear girl I just kept going and didn't stop to say hi. I could tell she was watching me, though, and starting to get curious. Then I made a second round, stopping again to let everyone pet me, and this time I stopped next to the fear girl but didn't look at her. That can be intimidating, you know, when you are scared of someone and they look at you. When she reached out and touched me I knew I was making progress. I thought, well, one more time ought to do it. So there I went again, stopping to see everyone in the circle, and this time I stopped and looked at the fear girl and most of the smell of fear was gone. I tried to tell her it was ok, I wouldn't hurt her, and she must have undertood because she reached out and pet me real nice.
My work here is done.
Lexi the Church Dog
October 17th 2012 1:19 pm
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Hello my loyal fans. (I am a theater dog, after all.)
It is October, the wonderful month when my dad spends all day every Saturday and Sunday at the place where my "Dorothy" works, Rock City. They have this festival with lots of good food and beer all month long. It is called Rocktober Fest. I know that's where we are going when we start driving up the mountain. Oh, I get so excited. Why? I'll tell you why:
1. Food falling on the floor
2. My beloved Dorothy - I think her not on stage name is Kim, like mine is Lexi, not Toto
3. Food falling on the floor
5. Food falling on the floor
6. Music and dancing
7. Food falling on the floor
Well, you get the picture. I have decided I don't really like their beer, but there is always Food falling on the floor. And great music and dancing. (Refer to comment: I am a theater dog, after all.)
The first Saturday, Mom and Dad dressed up in their funny German costumes and off we went to Rocktober Fest. Mom got cold, though, and went to the car. Then she got a call from Dad and started driving away! Aghhh! Seems that he had forgotten something, so she drove real fast back home to get it and changed her clothes (did I mention she was cold) and I was standing at the door ready to go back with her when she grabbed my annoying brother Riley and left me behind!!! Can you imagine the indignity of it all? Huh. Sometimes I just hate him. (I know, I am going to have to ask for forgiveness for that one!)
Lexi the Rocktober Fest Dog
October 17th 2012 1:29 pm
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Hello again my faithful followers,
Here it is the second weekend of Rocktober Fest, and Mom and Dad go off Friday night and don't come back. While it is true that my people brother Andrew came to stay with me - and I love my Andrew - the fact still remains that I got left. Does this mean I won't get to go to Rocktober Fest, I ask myself?
Saturday comes and goes and I am stuck here at the house with my dog brother Riley. Andrew and Jentry go off somewhere - work, I think - and leave me here wondering if and when someone is going to come take me to Rock City. Oh, woe is me.
Sunday comes and things are looking up. The boy has come - I think his name is Conner - and he is playing with Riley. That is good because I get to bark at Riley a lot when they play. It makes me look like I am protecting the boy, when in reality I am using as an excuse to take my anger and frustration out on Riley. BOL.
Things keep getting better. Andrew talked to my Mom (his mom too) on the phone and I heard him say, yes, Lexi's beard is clean. Then he packed us all in the car and we went to --- you guessed it! Rocktober Fest! Woo hoo. I missed my Mom and Dad so much and was so glad to see them that I couldn't even try to act all mad that they left me. So I got lots of good food off the floor and people adoring me and good music and all is now well in my life.
Lexi, once again the Rocktober Fest Dog
November 9th 2012 9:53 am
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Hello my underlings and ardent admirers,
After several years off from the physical therapy hospital I have made a come-back. It wasn't quite all I had hoped for, but it sure beat laying around the house listening to Riley lick his paws. I close my eyes, but I can still hear him. I digress.
I may have mentioned how much I love going to the children's hospital. Those kids are neatly tucked away in their beds - most of the time - and I sit on the soft mattress and allow them to pet me. Sometimes there is a rogue one in the hallway and I always put on my best therapy dog face and try to make them smile. Of course, I am always, and I mean always, smiling when I am there. The place smells like food - I seem to hit just after breakfast and before lunch and the odors are lingering, coming and going you might say. And everyone makes over me and pets me and says what a wonderful dog I am and wants to know all about me. I think mom should bring my bio and the Oz program and my Annie theatre award, but she seems content to just hand out my calling card. It has a rather flattering picture of me and some of my more important stats as well as pointing folks to my web page. Again, I digress.
So I smile my doggie smile, not just because of the wonderful food smells, but also because I know I am doing something good. I can get kids to smile, too, who have been crying up to the time they see me. I think they are sick, and maybe hurting, but just the sight of my beautiful bearded face cheers them. I know you must be saying, "Is this really Lexi the schnauzer talking?" It does sound so unlike me. Confession time: I do have an altruistic side that likes to make people happy, especially kids and old people. Mom says I am a gift from God to spread joy. Personally, I like the black raspberry spread, but joy seems good too, especially when it ends in a treat for me.
I will get back to you on how this newest therapy job progresses. I go again next month
Love and joy to all of you,
Lexi, therapy dog supreme
November 13th 2012 10:39 am
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Yesterday Mom dropped Riley off at day care and brought me to work, and at that point I thought the world was still turning the right direction on its axis. I had a good day at the church even though it was a Monday and the Quilters were not there. There were still lots of treats from other quarters.
Then we went to get Riley after work, which was still the norm. Where we went next was surprising but pleasant. Mom drove us to the Theatre Centre, a place of many happy memories for me. I not only gave stunning performances there in my role as Toto, I have also presented awards, received an award, and attended performances at other plays there. It's sort of like my alma mater. So far so good. There was even someone there with a microphone doing interviews and she was naturally more interested in me that anyone else. I really didn't understand why Riley was with us, other than he didn't have anywhere else to go, probably because no one wanted him. Mom told her all about my stint in the Wizard of Oz with several amusing antidotes. I know the reporter will have some good material there. Perhaps she will come back wanting a picture, my head shot for instance.
It was what happened next that sent my world spinning. We went into the rehearsal room to audition, just like I did 5 years ago when I got the part of Toto. I heard Riley's name called and Mom tied me to a chair. Everyone had made a terrible mistake. Surely they didn't actually want that big red bumbling mutt. Oh, the injustice! The travesty! What has this world come to! I tried to drag the chair out to the center of the room to make sure they saw me and realized their horrendous error. Someone grabbed my leash and stopped me. Pulled up short I barked and was ignored. Then Riley proceeded to embarrass me as he usually does. While it is true that he sat nicely and stayed and came when told, and while it is also true that he gave quite a nice bow, he was jumping all over people and I think he may have even frightened the little darling who was sent out to be his victim. Just when I thought she had had enough, someone brought her a chair, where she sat and sang prettily to him. He didn't exactly sit still while she sang, but when she was done he did show her how much he appreciated her singing by groveling all over her. I don't think she liked that either. He does weigh quite a bit you know, far more than a one stone schnauzer. In fact, he is probably at least 3 stones plus a lot of pebbles thrown in.
When all the dogs (except me) were done auditioning they were told that there were more dogs auditioning tomorrow and everyone would be notified of the results. Now that I have had more time to think about it, I am thinking that they will simply call me to come be the star without even so much as an audition since they already know what an awesome perfomance I give. They must just be doing this stupid human thing of being "fair" but I think it is just building up false hopes.
I will wait for the call and act surprised when Mom tells me I got the part. He, he. Won't all those other dogs be surprised!
Lexi, the thespian
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