Happy Birthday to ME!

On this day, Feb 2, 8yrs ago a Yorkshire Terrier by the name of Jody gave birth to me. About 12wks later my birth parents, Jody & Winston, sold me on the Internet to my current pack for a lot of cash. I'm a mean shit ass to my human parents whom I think are pissed as hell cause they feel like they shoulda got one of those sweet demure Yorkies instead of me. Whatever... It's my 8th birthday today and I hope I get lots of Jumbones, squeaky toys, cookies & trips up Bunny Hill. Happy Birthday to me! Woof! :-)

Highest Point in Continental US

Hiked up Mt Whitney yesterday.
OK... Maybe I only hiked part way up Mt Whitney yesterday. But my legs are only like 20cm long. (Euro length cause I'm a direct descendent of a Euro, Yorkshire Ben) So basically for a pooch as short as me I may as well of hiked up Mt Whitney yesterday. Was the only pack dog on trail. (I didn't actually have a pack on cause my legs are only like 20cm long & mum carries all my cookies & turkey legs.) But everyone loved me as usual. I'm cute as long as ya don't touch me. Woof! :-)

Congrats to Me! :-)

Mum was so excited to hear that I'm a  Dogster Diary of the Day. She's been texting, calling, emailing & may even have plans for a blimp to fly over the town today. 
If I had fingers & thumbs I'd be typing the darn diary myself. But let's be real.... Being mum's inspiration is a way tougher job than jotting down my shenanigans. 
Woof! 

Fall Hiking

OMDog! Spent the weekend hiking in patches of snow & trees dotted in red, orange & yellow. Of course I couldn't actually see all those colors cause I may or may not have a few cones. But mum said it was amazing. And I thought so too cause I chased my first dear ever. Actually I chased four. I can't count either. But mum can back me up on that too. OMDog! It was pretty incredible that my 7.5lb self chased four 70lb dear down the trail. Had mum had the video option turned on you'd all be seeing what I'm saying.
Woof!

My Junk's Gone

Was off in the mountains this weekend & hiked a lot & stuff. Anyway on the way home at a rest stop, while I'm peeing on the grassy "No Dogs Allowed on the Grass" spot, some dude comes up to mum & says "Is that a Yorkie?" Mum tells him "Yes. She's just big & has a longer snout than most Yorkies." Dude "You know... I have a male & was looking for a female to breed him with." Mum barks back "She's fixed. And even if she wasn't she'd be the worst candidate you were looking for. She's mean. She bites. She's horrible to sleep with. She hates baths & thats why we had to cut her beautiful hair so short. She hates people & most all other dogs. Worst dog we ever had." Dude "But she's so cute." Mum "Don't let that face fool ya. She's the worst. Plus did I mention her junk's gone?"
Am not sure momma really appreciates me....

Follow Up Phone Call Confusion

So the receptionist, Tiffany, from my new vet called & said to mum "We see your little darling's due for her Rabies & Bordetella. And did you want Corona too? I mean... We don't really have Corona in this area. Not the beer. The virus." Mum "But she's up to date on her Rabies. She's had Kennel Cough. And why would she need a vaccine for a beer? She doesn't drink beer." Tiffany "But it says on your hand written record you brought us yesterday that Rabies is due." Mum "Yes. I wrote that 3 years ago to remind me it was due this year. See my handwritten note about how she got it on 5-17?" Receptionist "Oh. It's confusing. Your writing to us looks like she was due on 5-17-11." Mum "She was. And she got it at the vet she used to go to that you worked for before he was busted with the doggy drugs and you quit and started working at this vet's office." Tiffany "So the shot clinics are Wednesdays 9 to 12 and all shots are 1/2 off for the Rabies & Bordatella. But we don't have Corona." Mum "Yes. Yes. No beer vaccination. Thank you." Then mum hung up, looked at me, mumbled "WTF?" & patted me on the head. :-)

No Worse For The Woof

Survived the 12hr food & water fast, teeth & ear cleaning, unexpected broken molar extraction and the drive home in mum's Mini. Doc said "No water until later this evening & no food until tomorrow." So am real glad mum poured that bottle of water into my bowl as soon as we got thru the door cause I was parched. And happy she piled the cookies on top of the couch as soon as I jumped onto it cause I was famished. Woof! :-)

9 Out Of 10 Doggy Dental Hygienists Recommend...

... a professional cleaning once a year. And since my last doggy doc was allegedly caught with doggy drugs, mum's got me a new doggy doc to clean my teeth tomorrow. And all I'm gonna woof is that I can't have anything to eat or drink after midnight tonight. Hoping things might not get too crazy after like 3am tomorrow morning when I'm looking for the water bowl... :-)

Blue Lake

Has been almost a full year since mum's posted for me. Am thinking about firing her. Except I like when she feeds me. I like to sleep with her. She's good company on a walk. She kicks down some decent cookies. She takes me out to potty whenever I want. She protects me from big dogs. She gives me baths which I hate but I always feel better when they're over. She fixes me chicky. Maybe I shouldn't fire her just yet...
Anyway, today we hiked up to Blue Lake which I'm not positive was blue cause am not sure I've got cones. Better Google that... Woof!

Daisy Dukes

So... Have been reading (Yup... That's ruffin right. I read.) all about Jessica Simpson's maltipoo getting nabbed by a coyote... It reminded me to run out to the edge of my yard and "aaarrrrRRRRROOOOOOO!"

R.I.P. Daisy