Dogster

return to top

The Adventures of a Farm Dog Leading a Charmed Life

Summertime and the livin' is too darn hawt!

So I have reprimanded my lazy secretary using the severest of terms woofing that she needs to transcribe the details of my adventure. Yes, I (aka SuperPetunia) emerged from the outhouse (no phone booths around here) in my full caped regalia to solve the country's ills- namely the oily gulf. I was tired of the countless images of sea critters struggling against the black sticky stuff. So, I flew down there and rescued as many dog-sized and under mammals as I could- plucking them from their distress and depositing them to animal rescue resources. I found flying to be more exhausting than I remember. It may be some time before I am able to resume my saving the day duties. Secretary looks skeptical but acknowledges that I did seem pretty pooped out and wet upon my return. She has made me promise not to fly anymore in this intense heat and has hidden my cape.

The (Not So) Great Escape

You may or may not have noticed my absence from the Intertubes this week. My Grandma Joyce came to visit and I had to make myself available for belly rubs provided by my fave grandpawrent. Also, the AC feels so lovely when it's a zillion degrees Celsius or something in my yard, that I've been napping even more than usual- if that's possible. Well, Grandma J left yesterday- can you believe it? So, after dinner I asked to go out for my evening constitutional, and quite shockingly, the gate was open just enough for a slightly voluptuous nine year old canine to squeeze through. I took that as a sign that Grandma wanted me to follow her so she could enjoy giving me more belly rubs. Well, I looked in every nearby swamp and area of dense thorny vegetation that I could find but no GMa J. So when it got dark, I returned home through a wide- open gate (weird- it wasn't like that when I left) to my Mama (who I must say looked like H E double hockey sticks with her leaky eyes, flashlight, leash and general demeanor of Mayoress of Crazyville). I was quite tired but I let her clip the leash and escort me inside. I had a nice long drink and was given a bully stick which I didn't even take to my usual bully stick hoarding room. I was THAT tired. My Daddy didn't seem to think I deserved it but Mama overruled using some nonsensical argument to the effect of killing the fatted calf when the prodigal daughter returns such was HER joy. She has already scheduled an emergency visit to the groomer's which I agree is sufficient punishment for my "perceived" wrongdoing. It may be quite some time before I find a slightly open gate again since someone has turned hypervigilant whenever I exit our pack's cool abode. It is clear why I needed to join the dogster group- Dogs Against Maternal Neurosis. Very worn out from my exertions yesterday evening. More juicy details later. Stay cool my fellow pups. Remember "Adventure is out there!"- but it's awfully warm too.

Bad news & good news

Mama took me to the Vampire Vet's office for my annual exam/ shots/ blood analysis. This was not my idea of a fun Friday afternoon- although I did get my entitled share of pats & expressions of admiration from staff & surrounding pawrents. Still, I'd prefer obeisance without the pokes & prods. The good news is I got a clean bill of health from the aforementioned vampire.