Enough of this crap.

Jeez, anyone would think I have no influence any more. Just look at all the weepy stuff in my diary. There should be a ban on humans taking over. Of course, my mind was going and I have to admit I have been a bit busy these past few months. No worries. I will eventually get back to my life history. I am sure you are all on pins and needles waiting to hear my wisdom. First though, I have a few things to share. Heading over the bridge is a bit disorienting at first. Just so you all know, you have the opportunity to say goodbye if you weren't able to before you left. My first night here they let me go back and visit a neighbor dog, Max, help him escape from his house and head over to Mom's. I knew she'd take him in. I got to snuggle with her all night. After that, I had a master plan to implement. There was no way I was going to let Dawson rule the roost. That boy needs someone who isn't distracted by belly rubs to take control. He'd sell Mom for a decent rub.

I know what you are thinking. I'd have sold her for a homemade biscuit. Not true. She was worth at least 10 homemade biscuits and I wouldn't have settled for less. Any way, first I had to convince Mom that Dawson wasn't meant to be an only dog. That was harder than you think - she take her promises very seriously. Of course, I had to implement "Have Puppies" urge into a breeder. Fortunately, I knew which one, 'cause Mom visited the page regularly and ooohed and aaaahed. Darn near got one when I was around, but I couldn't have that, now could I? Then I had to get all those Standard Poodles that were in rescue adopted, so none would be available. It really isn't so hard, there are a lot of good people out there who are more than willing to step up and become a dog's pet.

Nor was convincing Mom all that hard. No, the hard part was working with those darn puppies convincing one of them that Mom was not to be missed. Most of them didn't have a brain cell aware enough to understand this was more critical that where the next meal was coming from or staying warm. I persisted. I spent most of my time on the girls, as I knew that would be best for Mom. Two of them were pretty attentive so I hoped that all would go well on that day when Mom finally stopped by to pick one out.

Those puppies must have been smarter than I thought. All of the girls who saw her made a play for her. One was just too pushy, so I nosed her away. Another just wouldn't have been right, so she got pushed aside as well. Mom liked one who reminded her of me (Hmmm, I wonder why?) but my money was on the other one. She was determined. She spent everyday listening to my stories, and had the confidence to know she already had a home and didn't need to worry about anything else.

Smart girl. That flopping over for a belly rub move was inspired. So was the ear nibble. The calm, quiet thing was just perfect. Thank goodness Ginger stepped up to the challenge of looking after Mom. Now I can get back to the important things. *sniff* Ah, smells like the Rainbow Cafe has just finished a batch of biscotti.

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