DAY 146, Wednesday, 8/1/12

Whew! I’ve been working overtime these past couple of days. Tony and Bob have both been a bit down. Bob even skipped class tonight. It must be the full moon. Anyway, I’ve been playing therapist a lot. Now, if I could only get $150 an hour.

DAY 145, Tuesday, 7/31/12

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about that classic song by Pete Seeger:
“Where have all the crickets gone…long time passing?
Where have all the crickets gone…long time ago?”
Ah…they just don’t write songs like they used to. Not even Bob. Especially not Bob.

Bob woke up early this morning, and even though he said he wasn’t feeling so great, I convinced him that what we both really needed was some exercise, and since it was too early for the heat to have taken hold of us, I convinced him that we should go for a stroll on Pepper Creek Trail. It was immediately obvious that Bob needs some new tennis shoes—his old ones are looking pretty ratty, and I’m embarrassed to be seen in public with him—so I persuaded Tony to order him a new pair. Honestly, if it weren’t for me, these guys would have no style at all.

DAY 144, Monday, 7/30/12

I think I’ve made it very clear by now that I hate that training collar the Bob has been putting on me. However, it seems that I may be getting used to it. At first, I fought Bob when he tried to put it on me—until he figured out that he had to give me treats in the process—and then I fought him when we got outside. I would either try to remove it with my dew claw, or I’d rub my cheek against the ground until I got it off. On our last two walks today, I made no attempt whatsoever to get it off. Fighting it just seems to make it worse. Maybe if I stop fighting it, Bob will stop using it, huh? That would be nice for both of us.

Oh, my buddy Victor came by tonight, and we had a grand time. His birthday was Saturday. He’s 4 now. There’s a picture of the two of us on my profile page.

DAY 143, Sunday, 7/29/12

We had company last night. Three of Tony and Bob’s buddies came over for dinner. Naturally, they all wanted to pet me, and, of course, I had to be fair, so I went around and let everybody have a turn. It would have been easier if they had just formed a circle with me in the middle. Then, they would all have been able to pet me at the same time—non-stop, but I tried to be patient with them nonetheless. I hope they’ll come back soon ‘cuz they all seemed like really nice guys. Tony and Bob seemed to enjoy their company, and I know they enjoyed mine.

It appears that helping me with my diary has improved Bob’s own writing. He was notified this morning that three of his poems have been selected for the next issue of “Harbinger Asylum,” a Houston-based literary magazine. But did he even give me a treat to show his appreciation for my inspiration? Hrmph!

I took Bob to obedience class this afternoon. Yeah, I know, it’s not Wednesday night, but Wendy had a very small class today, and she asked me to go and help out. Besides, I figured that Bob can always use all the practice he can get.

DAY 142, Saturday, 7/28/12

We Germans have a word, “Weltanschaung,” which means “world view,” and I’m starting to worry about Bob’s. Today, for example, he was working on his computer, and I could see that he really needed a break, so I nudged him a few times (OK maybe more than just a few) to let him know that I would play with him if he wanted. Finally, he said, “Not now, Biscuit. I’m busy.” So, naturally, I nudged him some more, and he snapped, “Biscuit! The whole world does not revolve around you!” Now, you gotta admit: that’s just crazy talk!

DAY 141, Friday, 7/27/12

If you’ve been following my diary religiously,* you may recall that when I first moved in with Bob and Tony, I wasn’t too sure about the place. Maybe I was feeling a bit insecure, and I even punched out the window screen once and escaped before Bob found me. That scared the bejeebies out of him. Well, things have changed considerably since then. Tony usually gets up very early each morning, but today, he slept in, and Bob was the first one up. When it came time for us to go out, Bob didn’t want to wake up Tony, so instead of putting the lead on me before opening the door (as he usually does), he let me out onto the landing first. And you know what? I didn’t even make the slightest attempt to run away. I didn’t even turn toward the stairs. I just waited for Bob to come out and hook up the leash. I guess you might say that I’m feeling a bit more secure now.

*If you haven’t read all of my entries, I encourage you to go back to the beginning. The easy way to do that is to put the entries in chronological order with the click of a button. There’s a lot of good stuff back there that you don’t want to miss. --Biscuit

DAY 140, Thursday, 7/26/12

Remember how Bob finally figured out how he could get that training collar on me by crumbling up my treats? Well, Tony suggested that the Lickety Stick that I wrote about on Day 62 might work just as well. And it did—once. That’s all it took for me to figure out that by licking and dodging, licking and dodging, licking and dodging, I could get the treats and still avoid the collar. I’ve known for a long time that Tony and I were both smarter than Bob, but now I think it’s pretty clear who’s the smartest of all, don’t you?

DAY 139, Wednesday, 7/25/12

Bob went to the groomer’s yesterday, so today, it was my turn. Bob took me in the morning and dropped me off. Then, he came back and got me just before class tonight. I think he just wanted to get rid of me so he could go to a movie. Grrrr. No matter…when I got done I was soooooooooo beautiful. I thought about looking for a mirror, but then I realized that I might get an inflated ego, so I let it go. One big ego in the family is enough. Hint, hint.

So, class was good tonight. We didn’t do anything new, just practiced things we had already learned, but that’s good. Practice makes perfect.

DAY 138, Tuesday, 7/24/12

Man, I must really be getting old. During my morning constitutional, I came upon a cricket, and Bob must’ve spotted it the same time as I did ‘cuz he quickly barked, “Leave it!” And you know what? I did. I just left the doggone thing right there in the grass. Am I getting senile?

Yesterday, Bob had what he called an “epiphany.” (He likes to use big words; it makes him feel important.) You know how much trouble he’s been having getting that darn training collar on me. He tries to bribe me with treats, but I’m too quick for him, and I usually snatch up the treats before he can get the collar on. Well, yesterday, the bag of treats was almost empty, and there was nothing left but a handful of crumbs, so that was the bribe. However, it took me longer to lick up the crumbs than it does to snatch up a couple of whole pieces, so while I was busy licking, Bob was able to slip on the collar without my hardly even noticing. “Woof!” (That’s Canine for “Eureka!”) That was his epiphany. The only problem he has now is getting me to go out the door ‘cuz I wanna stay behind and lick the floor clean of all the crumbs that have fallen.

DAY 137, Monday, 7/23/12

I really like our apartment. The windows come down almost all the way to the floor, so I can prop my chin up on the ledge and watch the world go by. This morning, I got kinda excited (Bob would say that I went crazy). He couldn’t imagine what was going on ‘cuz he had just taken me out 15 minutes before. When we got outside, though, we immediately ran into my girlfriend Cassie. Finally, Bob put two and two together and figured out that I must have seen Cassie through the window and demanded to go out and see her.

In our apartment, we also have a nice big coffee table with a magazine/book shelf underneath the top. Whenever Bob and Tony sit on the couch, I like to curl up at their feet and rest my chin on that shelf. I think every home should have a coffee table like that.