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The Biscuit Diaries

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Day 34, Thursday, 4/12/12

May 1st 2012 9:16 am
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I was all set to dictate my diary to Bob tonight, but he couldn’t find the mouse. I’ll bet that cat next door ran off with it.


Day 35, Friday, 4/13/12

May 1st 2012 9:17 am
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Bob went to Teddy Bear Bakery this morning to pick up some cookies for the people Tony works with. I think that’s really nice of Tony to do stuff like that. While Bob went inside to get the cookies, I had to wait in the car, but even from outside, that place sure smells nice.

In chatting with one of the other Canines, Rex, I commented how lucky we were that we had roommates who would take us to the courts to run and plan, and he told me that his roommate only takes him to the courts to wear him out so that she can get some rest. I’m glad Bob and Tony are not that self-centered.


Day 36, Saturday, 4/14/12

May 1st 2012 9:19 am
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Yea! I got to go on a road trip today. Tony went to San Antonio to meet up with a friend of his, Mary Ann, who is visiting from Arizona, and I got to go with him. Tony wasn’t going to take Bob, but Bob looked so pathetic that I convinced Tony we had to take him with us. While Bob and Tony are staying at the Hampton Inn, I’m staying at the luxurious PetSmart PetsHotel. While I’m relaxing in my luxury suite, Bob is pacing the floor trying to figure out what to do without me.


Day 37, Sunday, 4/15/12

May 1st 2012 9:20 am
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I had a great time at the PetSmart PetsHotel. The clerks gave me a Pawgress Report Card with the following marks:
Food: Gobbled it down
Fun: Party animal
Bed: Lights out, sweet dreams
Potty: Took care of business
Overall: Carefree, calm and comfy
They also wrote, “Biscuit was AWESOME!! He made lots of new friends and played a lot.”

Tony and Bob brought their friend Mary Ann to meet me. She’s nice. We took her to the airport, and I hopped out of the car before Bob could catch me. I don’t usually do that, so it caught Bob by surprise. In fact, he looked a little worried. I heard Bob tell Mary Ann that he woke up in his hotel in the middle of the night and saw a white pillow on the floor and thought it was me. He’s got a bad case of separation anxiety.

The car ride home took about three hours, and it was exhausting. I think I’ll sleep well tonight.


Day 38, Monday, 4/16/12

May 1st 2012 9:23 am
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Tony gave me a fresh rope bone today. That’s because I chewed the last one to shreds. That’s OK, though. That’s what it’s for. The new one is different; it’s peanut butter-flavored. Mmmm.

I like my new bed ‘cuz it’s portable; I can grab it between my teeth and drag it from room to room.


Day 39, Tuesday, 4/17/12

May 1st 2012 9:24 am
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I’m so proud of Bob; he graduated from the Beginning Class last night. He even got a certificate. Oh, they put my name on it by mistake, but Bob’s the one who really graduated. He learned all those different ways to give me treats. I’m looking forward to the next class.


Day 40, Wednesday, 4/18/12

May 1st 2012 9:24 am
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I went to PetSmart in Temple today and signed Bob and Tony up for the intermediate class. For the beginning class, we went to the store in Killeen, but that was really a scheduling issue. The Temple store is much closer. I hope the trainer there is as nice as Norma was in Killeen. I’ll miss her, but it’s always good to make new friends. I had a coupon for a $20 discount, which is good because that’s $20 that Bob and Tony can spend on treats for me. Later, the trainer called to say that the class won’t start until next Wednesday. That’s OK. Bob can use the rest anyway.


Day 41, Thursday, 4/19/12

May 1st 2012 9:28 am
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Bob has spent most of the past two days working on a new song for a competition. I think he should write a song about me. He could call it “White Gold.”

So, anyway, because of his writing, he didn’t have time—or didn’t take the time—to take me to the courts this morning. (He needs to work on prioritizing.) He tried to make up for it by playing fetch with me in the afternoon. It wasn’t the same, but I guess I should give him credit for trying, huh?


Day 43, Friday, 4/20/12

May 1st 2012 9:29 am
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What makes Bob think he’s so special? I mean, Tony and I are up early, so what makes Bob think that he can sleep ‘til noon—or even ‘til dawn? I go up to the bed every morning and stick my nose in his face, and he just rolls over and tries to ignore me. This morning, I even jumped up on the bed and tried to push him out. I finally gave up and just lay beside him for a few minutes, but when Tony had to leave for work, I put my paw down and demanded that Bob get his you-know-what out of bed. Now that he’s up, I think I’ll go back to my kennel and take a nap.

I finally got to meet Bob’s vet today. Uh…well…I guess humans call them “doctors.” Anyway, you may recall that I wrote previously in my diary that the doctor had told Bob he could bring me to the office, but Bob was concerned that I wasn’t disciplined enough at the time. Well, I guess I showed him who’s disciplined and who’s not. I was a perfect little angel in the doctor’s office. OK, maybe not perfect, but 99%. The doctor was very nice, and he seemed pretty smart too. I wonder why he became a doctor instead of a vet. Maybe his grades weren’t good enough to get into veterinary school.


Day 43, Saturday, 4/21/12

May 1st 2012 9:32 am
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Hee, hee, hee. I decided to show Bob today that I’m just as creative as he is. He went to his Weight Watchers meeting this morning, and when he came home, he found me crossing the street on my way back to our apartment complex. Bob freaked out that I had gotten out of the apartment. I think he was actually a bit scared, but I introduced him to a couple of our neighbors, Fred and Roger. Fred is one of us, a Canine, and Roger is his servant, a human. Roger’s nice, though; he kept saying how gorgeous I am. While Bob and Roger chatted, I played with Fred. So, anyway, when Bob and I got back to our apartment, I showed him how I had pushed the screen out and gotten out of the apartment through the window. For some strange reason, he didn’t seem too impressed with my creativity. I wonder why. Today, at least, Bob doesn’t have to take me to the courts; I’ve already had my exercise for the day. Of course, if he wants to take me to the courts, that’s fine with me.

Wow! I’m on a roll today. This weekend is the annual Bloomin’ Temple Festival downtown, and Bob took me down there. His friends Rick and Pat were manning the Unity Church’s information booth, so we went to visit them. At the entrance, a girl tried to stop me. “No dogs allowed,” she barked, but I just showed her my Service Animal vest and flashed my baby blue-and-brown eyes at her, and the boss man said to let me in. As Bob and I walked past all the booths looking for Rick and Pat, we had to stop every few seconds to let people come up and pet me. When we finally got to the Unity booth, I drew a huge crowd for them. You might say I was their carnival “barker.” Arrf arrf!

Rick and Pat were getting ready to take their lunch break, so we went down to the Chipotle Grill. Rick said that would be a good choice because they had outside seating. When we got there, though, the manager saw my vest and said it would be OK for me to go inside. We found a table in the corner, and I just lay down and made myself at home while the guys ate. Rick and Pat were very impressed. Pat even took my picture.
Later, Bob went to PetSmart and got me a new dog tag. Tony had gotten one for me last week, but he put the wrong phone number on it, so I had to have a new one. Bob said that after this morning’s “episode,” he didn’t want to waste any time getting me a new tag. I have absolutely no idea what he was referring to.

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