November 3rd 2012 10:46 am
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To start off, I took ANOTHER bath today, but this time with a new shampoo that makes me smell like oatmeal, hmm. While taking my bath, I smelled so good I began to eat my shampoo, which got me in trouble. But, really if you smelled like oatmeal, wouldn't you eat yourself? Humans, I still wonder how they got on top of the food chain. Anyway, today I went on a Zombie Walk! Actually, I did not choose to go my little 6 year old friend made me because he did not want to go by himself. I made myself look very scary by putting on NON-TOXIC red paint all over my nose and mouth, so it looks like I am a zombie dog. Whenever someone saw me they asked what I eat, because I guess I am really fit for a zombie, so I respond,"Braaaaaaainsss," and walk away like a penguin. All the other zombies were around 6-8, so I was the big zombie there and everyone loved me. I took pics too! They are on my wall! So, that's it for now. Bark to you later! Woof!
November 2nd 2012 5:05 pm
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WOOF! Did you fellow woofers have a good day? Well, before you brag about how many squirrels and mailmen you chased hear me out! No pup would like to live in New Jersey this past week. First of all, the beginning of this month I got a rash and it is annoying me as much as the cat that is walking by me right now. Because I got this stupid rash, I take at least one bath a week! Grrr! I hate water and hot water and cold water and shampoo and colored shampoo and scented shampoo, but I do love shamPOODLES! Rrrruuufff. BOL!
Besides that, in New Jersey this week Hurricane Sandy has came and let me tell you she is one rude visitor. Sadly, I did not get to meet her, I guess she was too scared of me, but if I did meet her, she would be called Hurricane History! I cannot believe I did not see her, but I guess Mother Nature did and she did not like her, because it seems like Mother Nature was trying to blow her out of town, then she started to cry because how mean Sandy was. Grrr! I just hate mean people. Sandy has some nerve to, because she has seemed to come in my back yard over night and broke my fence! Now I cannot go outside and run, I have to be on a leash at all times! She also knocked down some of my favorite trees and she tries to steal my electricity from me. But, the nice public service people took it back from her today! I had to stay six days without watching DOGS 101 and THE DOG WHISPERER and having nice cold meat from the fridge! I am nearly jumping for joy now because she is gone, but I heard another Hurricane is coming! This one better watch out, I am on alert! Grrrr!
Remember how I said I got a rash! Well, my mom said I have to have a vet check it out! I love going to the vet's office to see other dogs, but as soon as I go in his office I get the chills. Really, any vets out there believe in "personal space" or at least asking before touching. My vet can not speak BARK, but I try to tell him Touch with your eyes, not with your rubber, foul, smelling gloves, dude! My mom tells me he is just doing his job, but PUH-LEEZEE he is probably really lonely and no dog loves him, so he pets me. That makes perfect sense right!
October 15th 2012 1:49 pm
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Hey fellow woofers! I love fall so much I have written a poem about it here it goes:
Fall, fall, fall
We don't go to the mall, mall, mall.
The leaves are so small,
but the trees are so tall,
Fall, fall, fall
Fall is the time for rolling in the dirty leaves,
and the time to bark at thieves,
Fall is the best season, I believe
Fall Fall Fall!
Bol! I am like Doggy Shakespeare!