December 1st 2013 7:38 pm
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I had some fun while mommy and daddy were at church! Yes, this time mommy got photos. Furst, I thought I sniffed some treats in the closet where the sucky monster lives. But I didn't find any. So I went back to the food bin. Daddy thought he had me locked out, but I figured it out!
Mommy and daddy were not happy. Daddy didn't give us hardly any din-din. Mommy says my belly feels like a watermelon, but I haven't urka'd or anything.
They'll be putting up gates on the kitchen doors. And the closet door, which hasn't latched in 25 years, will now get fixed. So you see, I'm really just contributing to our home improvement! Am I wrong??
November 28th 2013 6:23 pm
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Mommy and daddy left us in charge while they went off somewhere to have their Thanksgiving dinner. So, it fell to us to put together our own feast. Finding food when the pawrents are gone is my job. The only food I found in reach today was our kibble. It's kept in a bin in the kitchen. I decided to make it my quest, to get into that bin and harvest the wealth!
It wasn't easy. Hershey wasn't much help, but he kept sticking his nose in. At one point we accidentally knocked mommy's ovfur-the-stove shelf halfway ovfur. Evfurrything on there came crashing down, but there wasn't any food so we just left it all ovfur the floor.
Finally we got the food bin open, and oh boy! Did we feast! Hershey ate so much he had to urka some back out again! On the carpet! BOL!!
Then mommy and daddy came home. With company. They were so excited to see how clever we had been! (They knew it was mostly me and not Hershey. I'm a lot smarter that way.) They all pitched in to pick things up and put them back togefur. I'm sure they were glad to have a way to work off their big meal! So why does mommy keep calling me Bad to the Bone?
And why didn't we get our din-din?? On Thanksgiving???!
October 21st 2013 2:36 pm
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We've had a furry busy day at our house! Furst, mommy pretended she was going with daddy when he left fur work. She got up furry early to get dressed and stuff, and she put Hershey's calming collar on, and she told us to be Big Boys and even walked out the door with daddy when he left. Then there was a lot of opening and closing the door, and the next thing I knew mommy was saying bye-bye to daddy, and Hershey's calming collar went back in the drawer.
A few hours or days went by and a man came to the door. Hershey and I wanted to say Woof! and welcome him in, but he only wanted to keep walking in and out at the door and making holes and stuff. Mommy kept shooing us back into the living room. Finally he and mommy went out the door and closed it, but mommy came right back in. And then we got our brushing.
When we went outside for our walk, mommy wouldn't let us go around the corner. Hershey says, that means we're waiting fur someone. (Hershey can tell me stuff even though I can't hear.) Sure enough, after awhile a lady came walking toward us. I think I've smelled her befure, but Hershey got so excited, OMD I thought he would turn himself inside out! He said, "Auntie Myrna!!!" He's known her a long time. He loves her, prolly because she brings treats! So then we went on a walk. Mommy held my leash, and Auntie Myrna held Hershey's. She gave us treats evfurry time we sat down! Mommy doesn't do that! BOL!!
Auntie Myrna stayed fur a bit when we got home, talktalktalking with mommy. A little while after she left, another man came to our door! This one came in, and he brought lots of stuff fur us to sniff! It was like our floor, but in little squares. Mommy kept flipping through them. And he had something like a leash that he laid out on the floor, this way and that way. Mommy and the man talktalktalked, and then he left.
I wonder how many more times that front door will open befure daddy comes home?!
October 2nd 2013 8:35 pm
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Fur the furst time all summer, Hershey and I are both feeling just fine, at the same time! We're looking good, too, because we went to the groomer yesfurday! The days are getting shorter, but it's so nice out that daddy promised to take us to Fort Fun when he got home from work. YAAYYY!!
Mommy doesn't feel good. She barely moved all day, and when she took us outside at lunchtime it was only twice around the back court. I didn't even bother to poop. But it was okay, because she knew that when daddy got home from work, he was taking us to Fort Fun! YAAAYYYYY!!!!
So when daddy got home, Hershey and I were SO EXCITED, we were jumping around and running around in circles and daddy could hardly even get our leashes on! And we got in the car, and we drove to Fort Fun!!
But... It was CLOSED!!!! It's NEVFUR closed! We had to turn around and come back home. Oh NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Mommy said, "Oh, it's because it's a National Park." She furgot. I don't even know what that means. All I know is, I was a Good Boy and I got punished. :(
September 5th 2013 1:42 pm
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I've had so many owies this summer I haven't even written about all of them. It started with my big puffy red foot, then I had a sore on my back. Next I got an itchy red eye, then my ear got so itchy I scritched and scritched until I made it bleed! That was last week, and it took until today befure I could get in to see the vet. Meanwhile my foot started to swell up and turn pink again.
Mommy's been washing and wiping and putting all sorts of goops and ointments on my boo-boos, but she's only just keeping ahead of me! So she wanted the vet to check me out. He gave me a shot and said it's allergies and she's doing fine. He gave her more magic juice to rub on me. [mommy note: It's really Panalog; we call it Magic Juice because it seems to cure everything. We should get it by the gallon!] He says the fleas have been especially bad this year, especially the sand fleas, and that's why I flare up after we go to a beach. We'll probably stay away from beaches fur awhile.
He spent most of his time with Hershey! That's fine with me, BOL!!!
August 26th 2013 11:11 pm
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Daddy took me and Hershey to Fort Fun when he got home from work! Here's what we do: He comes in and we all say "Hi! Wag! Wiggle! Jump!" fur a bit. Then he changes his clothes and we get in the car (mommy stays home to fix his din-din). We drive just a little bit, out to the edge of the world where the ocean starts. There are all kinds of trails there, and lots of doggies! Hershey gets to run around off-leash, not that he evfur goes furry far from daddy. There are trees to sniff and pee on, and some places are sandy, and did I mention there are lots and lots of doggies? It's pawsome. I have to be on my leash, but daddy's a fast walker and we go all the way from the car to t-h-e-r-e and then up t-h-e-r-e and then all the way back to the car again! Then we usually go back home and I go night-night.
Only this time when we got back to the car, daddy acted really funny. He went "Oh man!" And he went "You've got to be kidding me!!" And he kept sticking his hands in his pockets and kind of growling. He called mommy on his little talky box. And then he decided we hadn't had enough fun, so we went back out and did our whole walk ALL OVFUR AGAIN!! Daddy must have felt kind of doggy, too! He was looking really close at the trail. I think he almost wanted to get down and sniff!!
When we got back to the car, we didn't get in. We just kind of stood there. Daddy would talk to some people and then they would leave, but we stayed. It was starting to get dark. But then a car pulled up and mommy got out, and then we all got into our car and went home! Now I'm double-tired!
[ed. note: Daddy had put on a pair of shorts with a hole in the pocket, and his car keys are now somewhere on the 2+ miles of trails at Fort Funston. He did not find them on the second walk. Mommy had to call a taxi to take her and HER car keys to the rescue. Daddy is now forbidden from wearing holey pockets out the front door!]
UPDATE 8/27: Daddy found his key tonight on the Lost and Found peg! Praise the Lord!!
August 23rd 2013 9:50 am
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I am a singer, so when mommy read this poem she wanted to save it in my diary.
by Paul Zimmer
Amongst dogs are listeners and singers.
My big dog sang with me so purely,
puckering her ruffled lips into an O,
beginning with small, swallowing sounds
like Coltrane musing, then rising to power
and resonance, gulping air to continue—
her passion and sense of flawless form—
singing not with me, but for the art of dogs.
We joined in many fine songs—"Stardust,"
"Naima," "The Trout," "My Rosary," "Perdido."
She was a great master and died young,
leaving me with unrelieved grief,
her talents known to only a few.
Now I have a small dog who does not sing,
but listens with discernment, requiring
skill and spirit in my falsetto voice.
I sing her name and words of love
andante, con brio, vivace, adagio.
Sometimes she is so moved she turns
to place a paw across her snout,
closes her eyes, sighing like a girl
I held and danced with years ago.
But I am a pretender to dog music.
The true strains rise only from
the rich, red chambers of a canine heart,
these melodies best when the moon is up,
listeners and singers together or
apart, beyond friendship and anger,
far from any human imposter—
ballads of long nights lifting
to starlight, songs of bones, turds,
conquests, hunts, smells, rankings,
things settled long before our birth.
Source: Poetry (August 1999).
July 16th 2013 2:56 pm
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I've been trying furry hard to get better in my eye and my paw. Some days are better than others. Yesfurday I didn't really feel like moving, or even opening my eye much. I did go out fur some business walks. At some point I got an owie on my back. Mommy noticed a little spot on her way to bed last night, she thought it might have been a spatter of mud on my fur or something. I'm not telling how I got it.
This morning daddy found it. I'd been working on it ovfurnight--scritch, scritch, scritch. So this morning it was a big open sore. Mommy says dime-sized. I don't know what that means, but she got all excited and pulled out the cotton balls and cleaning stuff, and then the medicine goop. I still wanted to scritch it, so she went hunting fur my old sweater. It's the sweater I wore in my foster home, when I was all shaved and sicky. I nevfur thought I'd see it again, but she kept it. I think I look kinda spiffy! She put a photo on my page.
Maybe it's the sweater, but I feel a lot better today! We went on a long walk, and my tail is all waggly! Mommy says I'll have to wear the sweater fur a few days. Good thing it's July here, cloudy and cold out! BOL!!!
July 3rd 2013 9:54 pm
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This time it's my eye. Mommy didn't take a photo because she didn't want to flash in it.
When I woke up this morning my eye stayed closed. Remember, I only have one that works. The other one stays mostly closed all the time anyway.
Mommy figured maybe I just had some sleepy goop in my eye. She swabbed it out like she does, with a wet cotton ball. But I still didn't want to open it. In fact, I still really just want to sleep.
When it was time fur our walk I didn't want to go. But I followed Hershey and mommy out the door and around the block. I did it mostly by nose. Then I came in and went back to sleep. That's where I made my mistake. Mommy decided it was time to call the vet.
When daddy got home we all went to the vet's office. I got poked and prodded, and they put stuff in my eye to make it go to sleep and then they put stuff in it to see if there is a boo-boo there, and there is. Maybe I scritched it, maybe I got sand or an eyelash in it, who knows? (There was no foxtail, we know that.) Anyway it's a boo-boo and now I have to get medicine in my eye on top of all the new pills I'm taking AND *shudders*...
...I have to wear a cone.
Can I just sleep until evfurrything is all better?
July 1st 2013 11:33 am
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I have an owie. It's my back paw.
I have a front paw that hurts, too, and I've been chewing on it since two sleeps ago. But mommy couldn't find anything wrong there, even when she poked and cleaned and fiddled with it. Then this morning I rolled ovfur fur a belly rub and showed mommy my BACK paw! The next thing I knew she was on the phone, and then we were on our way to the vet! I didn't want to walk, so I got carried.
The vet suspected a foxtail but didn't find anything. So he says it's some kind of infection. He shaved my footie and gave me TWO shots! And two bottles of pills I have to take. If I'm not better by tomorrow we have to go back. But I walked back to the car, and by the time we got home my tail was wagging again! I'm still mostly napping, though.
My daddy also has an owie in his leg and didn't go to work today. He's going to his vet later. So mommy isn't doing what she planned fur the day, BOL!! She says she's just rolling with it, but I haven't seen her roll.
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