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I, Scarlett

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Better Late Than Never

January 12th 2012 8:07 pm
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My mom has been reading some doggie blogs the last few days and when she told me about them, it got me thinking that I have a lot of interesting things to say too! So even though I've been in my forever home for 9 months now, why not start dog-blogging now? But maybe I should bring you up to speed on what I know about the early days and I've been up to since I got here:

? 2008 - Fall 2010: I don't remember much about this period (repressed memories maybe?), but my family tells me that I was living on the mean streets of Indiana with my brother Homer (and I was known as Marge then - can you believe it??) and then something called Animal Control picked us up. Apparently, whoever owned us didn't want to pay the fine to spring us from jail (the nerve!) so we were going to be put down. I don't know exactly what that means, but I guess it must be bad because a nice lady at Animal Control didn't think that was a good idea and frantically tried to find somebody to rescue us. Lucky for her (and me too, I guess), she found the nice people at the American Bullmastiff Association Rescue Service. Through ABARS, a nice lady in Chicago found me and picked me up from Indiana and brought me to Chicago. I was going to stay with her forever, but she had another bullmastiff named Alfie and apparently I didn't play that nicely with him. Now I personally think someone is besmirching my good name, but we won't dwell on that. So I stayed with her for a little while and then a nice lady named Carmen said she'd be my foster mom until I found my forever home.

Meanwhile, in suburban Chicago, 10-year-old Hannah continued her near-daily cajoling, I mean asking, of her parents for a dog. Now Mom was always OK with the idea of a dog, but Dad said there was ZERO chance of getting one. Yeah, we like to remind him of that!

On to March 2011 when Mom happened upon the ABARS website and saw a picture of me. She says this was kismet: Dad has always liked bullmastiffs, and I happened to be both close by and available! Mom sent Dad my picture and it was pretty much over after that. Look how pretty I am - can you blame him?

Foster mom brought me for a home visit in April and she brought all my things too just in case my family decided right then and there that I was the dog for them. Who are we kidding - did you really think they would let me go back after the home visit? I was a little nervous at first because I was so used to being abandoned, but it really was love at first sight all around and I've been here ever since. Mom always reminds me that this is my forever home, and I really hope she means it.

So what have I been up to since April? Well, let's see.

On my second night at home, I taught my family that there is no crate, no matter how many locks, latches and caribiners, that is a match for my escape-artist skills! I think they were surprised when they came home and found me outside the crate, but when they discovered that all I did was sit on the floor (and maybe the couch too, but don't tell them that!) and wait patiently for them, they decided that we really didn't need the crate after all.

In July, my family went on vacation and they were so sad to leave me, but they said that dogs weren't allowed on this trip (really? what kind of trip was this??). So they sent me to camp while they were gone. Camp was OK and I spent a lot of time brushing up on my sit, down, stay, come skills (yawn!), but I was kinda lonely and was really happy when they came back!

They still go away sometimes, but I only went back to camp one time for a few days. I was less lonely this time and even tried to play with other dogs, but I'd rather be with my two-legged friends. Oh yeah, about other dogs, I'm not really sure about them. My mom says it's because I haven't spent a lot of time being "socialized" (whatever that means) but I think it's just because I don't understand them. If they are mean to me, I'm going to be mean back. If they are nice, I'll be nice too, but I get bored easily and start looking for my family. And sometimes, I have to remind whomever I'm playing with that I'm the boss. :-)

I've had a lot of fun firsts with my family: First time to the beach (the water is kinda scary), first time to a hotel (the Sheraton in Ann Arbor is lovely!) and today, first snow! Well, maybe it wasn't technically my first snow, but it was my first snow with my forever family (FF from here on out) and it was so fun! I ran all around the backyard, buried my nose in the snow and even ate some snow! I'm thinking that adding some chicken-flavored syrup to a scoop of snow would make a lovely snow-cone! I had another first today that wasn't that fun: I had my anal glands expressed. I can barely talk about it, the indignity of it all (shudder). Both mom and I are hoping that this was a fluke and I won't EVER need to do that again. Mom was watching some do-it-yourself videos on YouTube last night but decided to take me to the vet, and she said it was the best $21 she ever spent. I have to agree with her because I'm not sure that I could ever look at her the same way again if she was the one that did the deed.

Whew, that's quite a lot for my first diary entry, and I'm exhausted. I will try and write regularly, or at least when something interesting happens. But if I miss some entries, they would probably read like this: woke up, took a walk, ate breakfast, napped, got belly rubbed, napped, snuck on couch, slobbered, napped, got belly rubbed, napped, played in yard, chased ball (or not), napped, car ride (if I was lucky), got belly rubbed, begged for food (Mom calls it begging, but it's really my practicing Jedi mind tricks), took a walk, ate dinner, got belly rubbed, napped, last call, went to bed.

Until next time!


Another day, another indignity

January 13th 2012 8:01 am
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Granted, it was more of a humiliation than a violation like yesterday's "incident." Mom read somewhere that us bullies are not tolerant of cold (if you ask me, she spends too much time Googling stuff), so she bought me a pink plaid coat for our winter walks. Yes, you read that correctly. I think I actually prefer last Halloween's pink tutu to the pink plaid coat. Today was a bit brisk, so she broke out the coat. She could not take a hint that I didn't want to wear it: not when my tail was tucked between my legs and not when I backed away. So finally, I gave up and let her slip it on, and we headed out. Once we started walking, it wasn't so bad, but I really would have been OK without it so I kept trying to shake it off but still she kept it on. I didn't feel comfortable enough to go #2 while wearing that thing, but I did my #1 business and will hold #2 in until later today when I'm unrestricted. Mom did take the ridiculous coat off when we got close to home, and she also let me off leash so I ran through the snow, ate some plain snow cones and bounded to the door. I think I like this snow! But not the coat!



January 15th 2012 2:03 pm
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As you know, Mom has trouble taking a hint (see previous entries about the COAT). It was especially evident today as she decided to try the kids' Just Dance game on Kinect. The game suggested to her that if she was tired, she should take a break (read, your dancing sucks) but did Mom take the hint? Nope, she just kept flailing away! Speaking of the COAT, I think at least she finally took my numerous hints on that and has given up on it. But not before one final public humiliation. We had just walked out of the house yesterday with the ridiculous coat on when who should drive by but Otis' mom. Of all people, why did it have to be one of Otis' people?? I'm sure she told Otis and now he'll be even meaner to me. I heard Mom say "I don't think Scarlett likes the coat" to which Otis' mom replied, "or course she doesn't - she's a DOG." Thank you Otis' mom! So after she drove away (chuckling, I'm sure), I stood statue still in the driveway until Mom took the coat off and left it at home. I think it's gone for good. Finally!

Trent and Dad have been gone this weekend at a hockey tournament so we've had a nice girls' weekend. Hannah has had friends sleep over both nights so I got to sleep with Mom both nights. I'm not sure how Dad will feel about that, so I hope he doesn't notice the drool stains on the comforter. The boys are home tonight so it looks like I'm back in one of the kid's rooms tonight!


Who is this Dr. Miller?

January 18th 2012 7:25 am
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I'm not so sure I like this Dr. Miller guy. First, he puts his finger where no one's finger should ever go. Next, he tells my mom that she should stop giving me roast beef and filet mignon (the nerve!). And now, he tells Mom I'm incompetent. There are lots of things I'm good at: getting belly rubs, willing my FF to give me food with just a look (but apparently, not roast beef or filet mignon anymore thanks to Dr. Miller), sleeping. Oh, wait. Mom said I misunderstood and I'm incontinent, not incompetent. I'm a little embarrassed - apparently I'm so relaxed sometimes that a little pee trickles out when I'm lying down. But Mom said it's no big deal, and it happens to the best of us - there's a reason she doesn't do jumping jacks or jump on the trampoline anymore! So I'm going to start taking some pills everyday (I'll think of them like vitamins) to keep me (and the floor and the kids' beds!) nice and dry.


You Like Me ! You Really Like Me!

January 20th 2012 12:06 pm
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Wow, I'm a Dogster Daily Diary Pick for the second time this week! I don't know if this second time was a mistake or if it was because the smart folks at Dogster can't resist my wit and charm. I am truly honored, but also a little nervous. What if people who read my diary don't think I'm as charming and funny as I do? Mom says not to worry and just be myself. She says that to her other kids too, so it must be good advice! As a treat today, Mom gave me some peanut butter on bread - two of my favorite things, and almost as good as roast beef! Speaking of which, when I saw her unload a juicy roast from her grocery bag, I got right into my best sitting position with my head up, ready to unleash my Jedi mind tricks on her, but the roast went right into the fridge! Hmm, maybe I'm NOT as charming as I used to be. Nope, that can't be it. I think Mom wants to wait until she cooks it and can share with the rest of the family before I get my taste.

It's snowing again today. Can't wait for my snow cones! We went to the golf course this morning before it started snowing. I didn't feel much like running so we didn't spend too long there. On our way out, we ran into one of Mom's friends and her dog Zoe. I had never met Zoe before so when she jumped on me, I jumped on her back. I didn't know if she wanted to play or fight! Mom pulled me off and then we had a proper introduction. There were a few other dogs there too and I kinda wanted to play with them, but I was also kinda nervous, so Mom thought it best if we just say hello and head home. That's OK - so long as I get to spend time with my FF.


Oh My Dog!

January 26th 2012 9:11 pm
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I was soooo gassy today. I don't know if it was the roast beef (take that, Dr. Miller!) or the peanut butter sandwiches, but something made me quite the airbag today. I used to not think much of my dog toots, but they seem to make everyone laugh. I think it's because I'm such a big girl and they make such a dainty noise, but as long as they don't smell and everyone thinks they're cute, it's all good, right?

I'm glad Mom isn't taking Dr. Miller's advice too seriously. She cooked that delicious roast she brought home the other day and I've been enjoying it for days now. I've been so full, I didn't even touch that chocolate cupcake Mom left out on the counter all week! But she knows what a sweet tooth I have so it's probably a good thing she finally stuck it in the fridge. Hmmm, if only I had opposable thumbs, I could probably figure out that door....



January 30th 2012 10:49 am
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I discovered the greatest new snack today! Well, at least I thought it was the greatest, but my FF doesn't seem to agree. I thought I was doing them a favor by finding a yummy snack that they didn't have to buy for me, and that I could get for myself. Well, apparently they don't agree that rabbit poop is a good snack for me because they're always telling me "no" and moving me away from it. I'm sure I'll still be able to sneak some when they're not looking, but I guess otherwise it's table scraps, peanut butter sandwiches and other non-poop snacks for me!


Old Habits Die Hard

February 1st 2012 8:01 am
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My FF feels like they won the lottery by finding me because they say I'm so weet and well-behaved (I try!) but sometimes I feel like I won the lottery by ending up with them. I get really good food and treats (even bits of filet against that evil Dr. Miller's advice!), 2 dog beds, 3 human beds and lots of love and belly rubs. But sometimes it's hard to forget where I came from. For example, I love these bully sticks that my FF gives me. I try not to eat them all at once, but I can't help myself! And then when I'm down to the very end, I start to worry that maybe, like back during my time on the street, someone will try to take it away. Or maybe I'll never get another one again. So I take that little end nub and start looking for places to hide it. Apparently under the couch cushions is not a great place because somebody always finds it and gives it back to me. Maybe I need to find a better hiding spot. Or maybe I should realize that I don't have to save and hide my food anymore!

I also remember being lonely a lot. I'm not so lonely anymore, but sometimes when my people are out, I try to find something that smells like them (slippers, the kids' stuffed animals) and I'll hold on to them and lick them. No chewing, just licking! But I'll also have to try and remember that my people always come back to me.


Best. Night. Ever.

February 2nd 2012 10:58 am
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Dad was gone last night so the rest of us had a sleepover in Mom's big bed. I don't think Mom got much sleep. I tried to stay down in my corner of the bed, but I woke up a couple times with her petting me - I think I might have woken her up with some of my doggie nightmares. I'm telling you, it's hard to forget some of the stuff I've seen! And Hannah kept even me up with her snoring. Seriously, we bullmastiffs have nothing on that girl. And poor Trent kept kicking the covers off because he was hot. He should have just done what I do and slept on top of them. Mom seems a little tired and grumpy today and I'm not sure we're going to get to have our family sleepover again tonight.


Mean trick

February 10th 2012 7:52 pm
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Today, my grandpa played a mean trick on me. We went to grandma and grandpa's house for grandma's birthday dinner. I was feeling a little anxious because last time I was there, my FF left me there for a week while they were off gallivanting somewhere. Don't get me wrong - I love my grandparents. But I really love my FF and as you know, I have some abandonment issues. It was fun (and Mom even snuck me birthday cake), but I was a little on edge the whole time. So when I saw my FF putting coats on, I was psyched to head home. But then grandpa called me toward the kitchen to distract me so my FF could leave. Needless to say, I felt sad and inched closer to the front door. Grandpa thought that was hilarious, and that's when I realized he was just teasing me. But I still think it was a mean trick. And when Dad opened the door, I bolted through his legs and ran out to the car. I'm home safe and sound now.

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