Barkings from the Boss Lady..

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major dog abuse...

May 8th 2008 7:39 am
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So have you heard that it is Be Kind to Animals week? Huh... well SOMEONE and Im not naming names..eh hem.. hint- betty boop voiced woman that used to attend to my every need? MYDEAR obviously didnt get that message. I have been suffering some mega DOG ABUSE lately thanks to her- and Im not likin it one stinkin bit!

I thought the whole Amy Whinehouse comparison was bad- well that was nuttin. MyDears head is like on another planet or sumthin- and its not fun let me tell ya.

For starters, DOGSTER.. yeah like she has not been updatin us- her precious furkids, no rosettes sent to my pals, no pawmails NUTTIN! How the heck am I supposed to find me a boyfriend if she doesnt get her butt back to marketing on my behalf??? GEEZ!! I mean before my buttkisser brudder hooked up wif Sumi Lou
hes gotten tons of lady requests! We are talkin like Fabio or sumthin! ME- nope nuttin- doesnt any guy out there want a fast, smart, Queen like me? Okay sure I might be bossy and have some junk in the trunk- but what the heck- us bigger girls need luv too! At least I have this special girl pal- Beatrix
We are like twins just about! That girl knows how to have F- U- N!
Thank Doggness for girlfriends when the chips (ooooh i would love me some chips right now)are down.

Secondly, my toys. They are all recked. SOMEONE left them out in the rain, pulled all the skweekers out, and demolished every last one of them! Yeah DOG ABUSE!! I need fresh and trendy new fun stuff if Im gonna keep livin here under these conditions let me tell ya. Ive taken up playin with an old sock. Thats how bad it is. BE KIND TO ANIMALS WEEK MY ARSE! Thats okay- maybe ill have to convienently forget Mutters Day!

I think MyDear has even forgot my name. She has been callin me Marie for weeks! GEEZ! Marie? WHy Marie? It guess it is better than "Big Momma" or "Baby Moo Moo" like she used to call me. But still! I tried gettin her to call me Furgie-but NOOOOOOO! Of course not- i never get my way!

If someone could forward the major dog abuse hotline number my way Id really appreciate it. thanks:) Ill keep ya posted if things improve- Im not holdin my breff.

your girl
The Millster
xoxo

 

Disgusted.. that horrid pack of lies- the celebrity dog test

April 28th 2008 7:15 am
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So like my good pal Ella.. I took the celebrity doggie test and I too, am that
nasty woman AMY WHINEHOUSE. Egads really? Am I that horrid? I mean, cmon I can tell you a few differances right off the bat...

Drugs.. Amy seems to love em- Mom has to encase my drugs
in heaps of cheese and still if I detect them in anyway- nope aint happenin.

Teeth- have you seen this womans teeth? Yikes! Get a dental already honey!
Obviously they dont have a VetGuy across the pond cuz she would never get away with those fangs over here!

Weight- Shes skinny.. Im well, full figured.. nuff said.

Hair- dang shes got a beehive on her head! I dont like bees AT ALL. Since Oliver and I tried to play wif a beehive in our yard and got bit up like crazy I hate them bees like you wouldnt believe!

I could go on and on, but is it necessary? GEEZ Its pretty obvious this test is
just a batch of lies! Im DEFINATELY more like... lets see.. Princess DI or someone totally bootyful and smart and fast... Okay like FERGIE!

Aktually we are like twins Fergie and I. The VetGuy even said so.. last time I was there to visit him MyDear asked the most totally embarrasing question... she says.. and right IN FRONT OF ME MIND YOU.."Jeff (thats the VEtGUYs real name) WHY DOES MILLIE HAVE ..... THIS?" and with this she points to my pink swingin lady belly.. you know, like the area that if I was a Momma Kangaroo my Joey would go in? YEAH HOW RUUUUUUDE!!! Well you know what my wonderful pal, Good ol VetGuy JEff said?? He said "THOSE ARE HER LOVELY LADY LUMPS" (swoon)

ME? I have lovely lady lumps? I was sooo happy! Fergie and I have lovely lady lumps! So bring on the treats. I need to keep my Fergie figure totally rockin and that means treats and loads of em. That will teach MyDear to ask rude kwestions about my girly parts!

So its been super fun around my den lately.. You know the Daddy Guy is gone and we are like pawtyin around the clock! MyDear is the biggest pushover on the planet so I have taken over as the full time boss! Its pawsome let me tell ya! I have my own room now- MyDear says Im just like a rebellious teenager cuz I have a "tude" . I go lay on my big girl bed (MyDear says its for guests but no one EVER sleeps in it!) and snore my head off- if Oliver even TRIES to get on my big girl bed I show him my fangs and tell him to beat it! HE runs like a widdle baby to tattle on me to MyDear but do I care- NO!!!! BOL! I might let Harvey sleep on my big girl bed if he wanted to.. if he didnt STINK so bad- BOL! DANG you should smell that kids breath- EGADS-HE should be Amy WHinehouse- NOT ME! BOL! Plus he eats his drugs willingly right outta MyDears hand- hey he is like AMY!

Well, he didnt get a much better one- his celebrity test says he is Simon Cowell- HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Peace and treats-
Millielicious
( i be workin on my fitness- not- BOL!)

 

tears..

April 16th 2008 8:02 pm
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From mom tonight:

Just got home and checked in on my Dogster family- when I see my good pals Autumn and Rocky had pawmailed me with this horrible news of Elvis making his journey today. My heart is so broken- for Colleen, his family, his boy, his Priscilla, for all his pals.. Im just so devasted to read this..

 

My funny trick- new and improved!

March 26th 2008 8:06 am
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So since my new little brudder came to live here Ive really had to up my game. Yeah, I thought MyDear was nawseating with Oliver- you should see her with this new kid! Geez! Its non stop- Harvey this and Harvey that- Dang! I mean throw me a bone lady (no for real- Id love a bone right about now) Hello? REmember me? YOUR LITTLE FAVORITE? THE MILLSTER? hmmph..

Ha! Its okay cuz I have come up with some new fabulous dirty tricks to play on her! HAHAHAHAHA! Its sooooo fun messin with MyDear- she never sleeps anymore so she has like NO patience! Unless your short and stinky- then thats a different story!

So when MyDear gets ready to go to work at the MoreGage store- I get ready.. I wait.. When I see her pick up the Banger (Harvey) and head towards his crate.. I take off runnin as fast as I can, wipin out anything and anyone that dares to get in my way- and I dive head first into his crate before MyDear can set him in there. THen I sit down, bark and growl and show my fangs and smile all at the same time at MyDear and just DARE her to TRY to remove my large arse from the crate. Nope. AINT HAPPENIN SISTER! LOOKS LIKE YOU AINT GOIN TO WORK TODAY- BOL!!! It works sooooo good!

So MyDear thinks she can outsmart me- HA! DOESNT SHE KNOW BY NOW? YOU DONT OUTSMART THE QUEEN! She starts chanting (use Betty boop voice)
"OH MILLIE- TREAT TREAT TREAT! " trying to lure me outta the crate-HA! I aint from yesterdays litter honey.. I keep growlin and fang showin and laughin at MyDear as the clock is tickin away.. MyDear gettin madder and madder til she almost blows a gasket! BOL!

She tries to up the treats- "OH MILLIE! I HAVE CHICKEN COOKIES"
nice try- its gettin better...but you can do better than that- i know I smelt somethin way yummier than chicken cookies in that large box you call the fridge..

betty boop has now turned into Carrie or Sybil or some other insane lunatic
"MILLICENT MARIE I AM NOT FOOLIN AROUND GET YOUR BUTT OUTTA THAT CRATE AND COME GET SOME CHEESE RIGHT NOW!!!!!"

uh oh..Millicent Marie? Shes bringin out the big guns- i trot out and collect my cheese and as Im just about to grab my cheese politely outta the Excorsists hands she tosses it across the room and runs to the crate and throws the Banger in there and whams the door shut before I can get my arse back over there. "HAHAHAHA MILLIE!!!"
Then MyDear kisses me goodbye and trots out the door..

My moral of the story-woman better never run outta cheese... BOL!

Bark at ya later-
The Millster xoxo

 

So Hopeful..and so proud to be a Dogster..

March 12th 2008 12:42 pm
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Oh. My. gosh. I cant tell you all how proud we are to be a part of
this pawsome Dogster family. Our eyes have been leakin right along
with all of you terrific pals- out of joy, out of frustration, out of empathy,
out of anger and out of just plain relief... for Elvis and his family and what they are going through.

We are so happy that a prognosis is made- and it is so hopeful. Its what we all have been hoping for- whether it be through prayers or however you ask for miracles to happen- for the gift of more HOPE. And we got it- THANK YOU WE GOT IT!!!! We are so touched to see this support for them and to be apart of it- just more reasons we wuf you all:)

Thanks for including us in all the Hoping, Loving and Supporting our sweet precious pal.. We will keep hoping and praying!

 

Hope, Love and Elvis!!!!

March 1st 2008 6:48 am
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Pupper pals!!! Guess what?!? You may have noticed that my main pic isn't of my lovely face... but rather it's a pic of Elvis!

They-who-do-not-wish-to-be-named (silly pups!!!) have come up with the most fabulous and brilliant idea to celebrate, support, and show our unity for Elvis!

Grab this pic! Right-click! Save to your Desktop! Upload it as YOUR main pic! Let's show Elvis and his pack just how much we love them, support them, are thinking of them, and are hoping for the best!

Let's unite and give Elvis and his pack the best kind of love there is... Dogster love!

The photo is courtesy of
Daisy (beloved angel) and Ella's dad. ITs pawsome! The words and efforts we have totally plagerized of of their pawsome mom! Talk about an angel~!!

 

Prayers for Elvis

February 23rd 2008 7:18 pm
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Hi pals-

Through my tears tonight Im doin my diary.. One of our bestest pals, Elvis
is in need of all of our prayers, thoughts and love. He has been diagnosed with
Acute Neutrophilic Leukemia, and it doesnt look good for our sweet pal. He is only three- much much too young. We are sending so much love to Elvis and his family...

Thinking of you E..

 

Naughty at the Pawty!

February 1st 2008 1:07 pm
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So MyDear decided that she would live life on the edge and have some company over. Now mind you, Oliver and I dont really have the best
track record when it comes to visitors. We tend to get a tad- well Nutso would be a good word to describe it.

So MyDear invited Auntie Shan ( LOVE her) and her super pawsome skin daughter Harley over for dinner last night. I saw that as an opportunity to PAW-TY! I mean why should they be the only ones havin fun??

So Harley is 13 yrs old and like super cool- I mean, if I were a hooman Id be hangin out wif her for sure. She even has an earring in her lip!!! HELLO I WANT THAT!! Anyway- so MyDear didnt want to horify them wif her cookin so she ordered a pizza- smart thinkin! So Oliver and I started off the festivities by barkin our heads off and dashin through the house like our pants were on fire when the pizza guy arrived. The delivery guy was skared! HAHAHA! The more MyDear yelled at us to stop- the more we barked and jumped! BOL!! IT was pawsome!!

So then DING DONG! Auntie Shan and Harley were here! LET THE GAMES BEGIN!! First we rushed the door- barkin, and tryin to jump on anyone and anything that moved- I thought MyDear was gonna have a melt down! She was tryin to settle us down and get the guests in the door before we skared them away! BOL! MyDear even had to get a rolled up US weekly magazine to try and skare us into behavin- Guess what? DIDNT WORK! HAHAHA! We know her empty threats by now!

So that passed finally- (and MyDear was sooooo embarresed I could tell) and the girls were all sittin around chattin and having good ol fun! Oliver and I settled down and showed Auntie Shan and Harley how nice and cute we can be when we want to. That was short lived- MyDear decided to get the pizza out. So all the ladies were sittin around eatin the delicious yummy pizza- when Oliver just went over and helped himself to a piece off of Auntie Shans plate. He gobbled it up so fast he didnt even chew it! Im sorta proud of him- I didnt think ol butt kisser had it in em! THe girls screamed and laughed and I thought MyDear was gonna have meltdown #2.!! BOL! I mean we were like a Cesar Millan "BEFORE" episode!! We NEVER EVER are allowed people food off of people plates- let alone GUESTS! HAHAHA!!

Then the best part- I decided to show off. I have this really cool dance that I do only for company. MyDear calls it my Butt Scootin Boogie. She pretty much dies of total embarresment when I break this out for company. You see first I sit down, and then I start Scoochin my big furry butt on the carpet and at the same time, I start spinnin in a circle. WHile all that is goin on, I start slurpin my big pink toungue at the moon- its so pawsome! I only do it for guests! They love it! They laugh and laugh and laugh! MyDear yells at me to "knock it off" she thinks its disgusting! I detect jellosy because she cant dance like that let me tell ya- she wishes! Harley and Auntie Shan LOVED it! They were roarin wif laughter!!! It was great!!

There was so much Chaos goin on- that Oliver decided to run and jump on the couch between MyDear and Auntie Shan- but OOOOPS! When he did and Im not even jokin- he puked all over MyDears whole body!!!! OH MY DOG IT WAS SOOOOO NASTY!! All the girls went nuts! Auntie Shan, MyDear and Harley were laughin so hard I thought they were gonna cry! MyDear went runnin off wif puke all over her pawty clothes!! IT WAS THE BEST! So in the midst I was ticked that my Butt Scootin Boogie was upstaged so I started barkin at everyone- and started Scootin even more! YEHAW now THIS IS A PAWTY!

MyDear was so mortified at us- Good thing the Daddy Guy wasnt home or we would have NEVER gotten away with any of this. And people wonder why MyDear doesnt entertain much- BOL!!! We wonder too- we are so much fun at pawtys its unreal!

So after Auntie Shan and Harley left I was pooped. I ran right off to bed and didnt wake up til morning. Gee I hope they come back soon- what a blast it is to have friends over!

Woofs to my pals!
The Millster xo

 

Im the bully of the playground

January 31st 2008 7:05 am
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So we have gotten like a bigillion tons of snow here at my crib- and its been like a bigillion below zero too- MYKIND OF WEATHER! BOL!! My little brudder Oliver, the ultimate wimp and mommas boy baby- hates the snow and cold- but me- I love it! So Im up to my ol tricks- I pretend like i gotta go out for bizness purposes and I get MyDear to open the door into my yard- then I run off like a loony tick and flop down in the snow bank! BOL! Its the funnest! It was 6 below zero yesterday, and MyDear was sitting in the door way- door open of course- beggin me to come inside. NOPE- NO CAN DO LADY! HHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I pretend like I cant hear her and lay there sniffin the breeze- its pawsome!!

Then sometimes when I get bored- and MyDear is doin her "teachin me a lesson" garbage by not callin me in- I go up to the door and scratch scratch scratch to come inside accompanyed by my famous "Im so cold Im gonna turn into a statue" face. MyDear RUNS to let me in (I told ya I have that lady wrapped) and I wait for her to get the door open - and PSYCHE! I run away laughin!!! This is like my all time favorite game of the winter- I get her every year wif that one- youd think she's learn by now! BOL!

So then my brudder felt like playin outside for like- oh one second. So he gingerly trots around in the snow, all polite and cute- avoiding me at all costs- tryin to blend into the trees- when I come BARRELIN at him at high speeds from across the yard- WHAM! I knock his butt down and run off laughin!!! BOL! TAlk about funny!! MyDear yells at me and is basically appalled that I am such a bully- then of course she has to cuddle and love on ol baby pants cuz he ran to her cryin. What a baby!! Then while she is comforting the wimp I ran and got my skweeky ice cream cone and came runnin at the both of them skweekin like a mad woman- SKWEEEEEEEK!! IN YOUR FACE! I pushed the skweeky cone right in Olivers face! HAHAHAHA! Again MyDear yelled at me to BE NICE! Hey Im nice- I thought he might like to have a rubber ice cream cone skweeked in his face- BOL!!

So tonight should be fun- 5 or 6 more inches on the way- YEHAW!!!! I just love this winter stuff!!!


your pal-
The Millster
xxoo

 

Ive been tagged by my cute pal Ben!

January 24th 2008 9:45 am
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Wow somethin really cool has happened- my super fun and adorable pal
Ben
has Valentines tagged me! Woo hoo!!!! Here are my 5 wishes....in no certain order..


1) for Hope
to finally go home with KM and live the good life...

2) Cheese. Need I say more?

3) the ongoing wish- health, happiness and love for all my pals
and their packs.

4) No more puppy mills. Ever.

5) Loving homes for all.

Whew! That was hard! I better go nap awhile and dream about my wishes- gee I hope they all come true:)

Thanks Ben- that was fun! I have so many pup pals that I want to Tag- I just cant decide. I wouldnt want to leave anyone out so how about I leave it open- if you want to play Valentines Tag- go for it!

The Millster
xxoo

 
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