Hi, I’m Allison. Read my introduction to learn more about me and my three mixed-breed dogs from Thailand, Jelly, Lorraina, and Manic.

I would not consider myself a jealous person. However, when it comes to my dogs, jealousy oozes from my pores if they seem to favor someone else over me. I desperately wanted to think that dogs are pure enough not to have favorite people, but I honestly think Manic favors my husband over me. Should I divorce him over my perceived idea that one of our dogs loves him more than me?

Answer: maybe.

Manic: The Daddy’s Boy

I first started noticing Manic’s preference for my husband over me in the evenings. Manic sleeps in our bed, but before he settles in, he loves getting cuddles. He will leap onto the bed, crashing against our older dog, Jelly (who leaves in a huff due to the disturbance), and snuggle up against one of us for scruffs and cuddles. Usually, he would alternate between us; basically, whoever was in bed first.

However, Manic started waiting for pre-sleep cuddles from my husband rather than me. At first, I did not mind. Manic would often slap my phone out of my hand if I stopped petting him for a few seconds, so I enjoyed my uninterrupted doom-scrolling.

But as soon as my husband climbed into bed, Manic would leap to his side and lay beside him, wanting to be the little spoon. He would gaze at my husband with longing eyes and slap his paws on the bed, demanding to be petted. Manic looked like he was in heaven, lying there in my husband’s arms. He closed his eyes and sighed contentedly.

Ouch, Manic. Ouch.

What Did I Do Wrong?

My jealousy over Manic favoring my husband led me down a spiral. Why did Manic hate me? Yes, I know I was being dramatic, throwing around such an ugly word to describe Manic’s feelings toward me. But I was hurt, gosh darn it!

I thought about my interactions with Manic. I always greeted him when I returned from the gym or ran errands, so I never ignored him. I was in charge of feeding them during the day, so he could not use “withholding food” as an excuse. I always made sure he took his heartworm and flea/tick medication on time. I checked to make sure his e-collar was charged so he would not escape into the woods.

I am a good dog parent! So, what did I do wrong? But then it dawned on me: my husband was the fun dog parent.

The Good Dog Parent vs the Fun Dog Parent

My husband is, for sure, the fun dog parent.

Every morning, the first thing he does is grab some treats from the jar and divide them amongst the trio. The dogs were all used to this early morning routine. Once, I woke up before him and tried to do the treat distribution amongst the trio. However, as soon as my husband got up, they ran to him for a second round.

My husband also gave them treats after dinner. Again, the dogs are used to the routine. As soon as they finish their dinner, they expect a small treat. Even if my husband was working in the garage, he asked me to tell him once they were finished eating so he could give them the treat. I said that I could do that since I was in the house. He insisted because he does it “a certain way.”

He also plays a lot more with Manic. While working in the garage, Manic would sneak in and steal a piece of wood, rope, or clean rags and run off with them. It was a game for him because my husband would run after him, and they would play with the item Manic stole.

Yup. He was the fun dog parent. I was the boring one.

Does Manic Love Me?

As dog owners know, people have different parenting styles for our canines. The most important thing is the love and care we give them. I love all my dogs, and I show my love by making sure they are healthy, fed, exercised, and safe. Of course, my husband does that, too. He just does it in his way, while I did it my way.

The other day, it was rainy. Rainy days always bring me down. Plus, I had a headache, so I was snuggled under the covers, wishing the day would end. Then, I felt a presence next to me. I opened my eyes and saw Manic standing over me. I slid down next to me. He did his playful paw-slaps on my arm, indicating that he wanted to be held. I wrapped my arms around him. I guess he does love me, after all.

• See also: My Dog Doesn’t Like My Boyfriend, What Should I Do? 7 Vet-Approved Tips