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The Purina Diet

This is the place to let your fur down! This forum is for games, sharing fun stories, and just having a good time with your fellow Dogsters!

  
Daisy Mae

water=heaven!
 
 
Barked: Mon Mar 8, '10 3:08pm PST 
My boss sent this to me. He's semi-retired; doesn't have enough to do smile

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet,
Biscuit, the Wonder Dog. While in the checkout line a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog and that
I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish
Setter's ass and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.

(Author unknown)
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Maddi

FAST DAWG!
 
 
Barked: Wed Mar 10, '10 5:39pm PST 
My mom is sending that one out! laugh out loud
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Sophie

Did someone say - SQUIRREL???
 
 
Barked: Wed Mar 10, '10 5:53pm PST 
big laughbig laughbig laugh Good one! laugh out loudlaugh out loud Thanks for the good laugh, Daisy!
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Maddi

FAST DAWG!
 
 
Barked: Thu Mar 11, '10 4:17am PST 
But she said A WORD and nothing happened! What's up with that? Is it ME?
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JerryLee

Lord of the- manor,master of- the woods.
 
 
Barked: Thu Mar 11, '10 5:36am PST 
What WORD Maddi ?
Dis iz a cleaned up version of da way I heard it !!! laugh out loud
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